Hey so… this happened again and i am now really scared of somehow repressing sexual desires ( sorry )



For anyone who doesn’t know what i am talking abt, here is the link https://www.reddit.com/r/Asexual/s/I4YhxuUY4A


So first off, i really apologise for this type of post, i really did not felt well this time bc i woke up with a dream that i didn’t want at all


I am sex-repulsed. No, i don’t think sexual dreams are shameful. I think it is normal for ppl to have them and like it. I just did not like what i just witnessed in my dream bc i don’t like sex Thats it.




Welp this happened again, but worse bc now it included me ( i wish it wasn’t bc i did not want to be here. And tbh… while i was in that dream, i was literally thinking abt a comic book that i saw. Idk it was an action comic book abt two ppl fighting or whatever )

The worst part is that..( TMI I AM SORRY ) my body reacted even though i did not find it apealing.

Which made it even worse bc now i am afraid of somehow repress sexual desires/urges or attractions bc THESE ARE NORMAL.

At first i didnt react bc i thought
‘’ its just a dream. I didn’t like the dream but i am too tired to react ‘’


But then hours later my brain goes ‘’ You know that one dream that you had that your body reacted but you still didnt like the dream. Then it means you are trying to repress urges and you actually did like it. Bc it looks like you did bc your body reacted while you said you didnt like the dream which means you are lying and that you are trying to unconsciously block your sexual desires, urges and attraction ‘’



Yeah this whole paragraph made me cry……LITERALLY.


Bc I DON’T WANNA BLOCK/REPRESS URGES. ITS FRICKIN NORMAL.



But idk if i do feel them. But i am scared now bc i heard that ppl who are sexually repressed gets sex dreams and convinces themselves that they didn’t like it.




I GENUINELY DIDN’T LIKE IT. but I AM SCARED FOR MY LIFE ABT IT BC WHAT IF I SM SOMEHOW REPRESSING SEXUAL ATTRACTIONS/URGES/DESIRES THAT I HAVE WOTHOUT ME NOTICING IT?????



I don’t wanna do that.



Worse, i checked my phone the other Day and a dude in the comment said something abt ‘’ welp, it can happen that the reason why they have these dreams is bc its their actual desires being unconsciously blocked by themselves for whatever reasons ‘’



Yeah, this made me past my limits today. ( no hate on whoever commented this. I am sure you didnt mean to trigger me. It is my mental problem and it is not your fault )

Now i am scared THE PISS out of myself.


Bc i am scared of somehow repressing sexual attraction/desires and urges unconsciously

( future me: you have been repeating this a thousand Times…..stop it )



Like….i can’t no more. My brain keeps playing with me and even convinces me that i ‘’ did like it ‘’ bc i didnt react to it. STOPPPPPPPP





like i am scared of repression. I don’t wanna do that


Anyways Thats my stupid rant. I am sorrry abt it, it is pretty embarrassing.




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@asexualityonreddit

Question for asexuals — do you guys enjoy 🌽 in any form?

Genuine question! For asexual people, do you still enjoy 🌽 in any form — like videos, erotic novels, or illustrations? Or is it just something that doesn’t interest you at all? I’m just curious how it works for different people since everyone’s experience seems a bit different.

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Asexuality Pro List

Comment below and share some of your pro’s. Off the top of my head as an asexual without a dating life or a sex life (ever):
- time, time, time ⏰ I have lots of it and all of the freedom to do what I want with it
- I am readily available for my loved ones at all times
- studying my niche interests and goals like I’ve always wanted to since I was a kid
- Built (and still building) stronger familial relationships and friendships
- Stronger sense of personal values and beliefs
- Nobody is stressing me out
- physically, absolutely no risk of disease or pregnancy in my everyday life
- had the space and time to recognize my unhealthy habits and boundary issues and work on them
- no STD’s (sexually transmitted demons): Personally, I believe that sex transfers more than physical material. So, this is a pro for me

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Am i still Aceflux?

Title. I’ve been more interested in sex the last day or two and I label as a Queer Demiboy.

Queer ☂️
-Homoflexible
-Aceflux


So as i still Aceflux? If not, what label might fit me better now?

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Lingerie?

So, im in a relationship, and i was shopping the other day, and I was in a few lingerie stores just looking around cause why not, and i started imagining my partner in some of the things, we've never done anything sexual so far, and ive never had these thoughts, ive never imagined someone wearing them except for maybe me.. but like, it was just my partner wearing them, not anything sexual, just.. idk how to explain it. Has this happened to anyone else? I just saw some stuff and I thought oh they would wear something like this, and then the image popped up in my head

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@asexualityonreddit

I have no words,except why? And ew
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@asexualityonreddit

October 26th UK Meet-Up in Birmingham

Hey UK Aces 💜🖤 We are holding another Ace meet-up in Birmingham on Sunday 26th October! Possibly a bit spooky themed so if you want to dress up, bring accessories or games please do!

Starting at 12pm Meeting at Bacchus near New Street, here are directions as Google maps can be a bit confusing!

Bacchus is located under the Burlington hotel, in the Burlington arcade.
If you come out of new street station and turn right along Stephenson street, walk past the tram stop and then past grand central kitchen and ONU clothes shop, that is the entrance to the arcade. If on New street then the entrance to Burlington arcade is opposite cannon street.

Last two times were good turn outs, so it would be great to meet more of you! It’s a calm, safe and fun way to meet other ace people, play games, chat and have a laugh together.

Let me know if you’d be up for it, and feel free to bring friends or family if you are nervous coming alone. Hope to see you there!




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@asexualityonreddit

Reading smut as an asexual

Hallo everyone I just want to ask the asexuals who read smut, I read smut and not only the vanilla one I tend to read heavy smut like noncon dubcon etc, but when I read it I dont get turned on by it I just enjoy reading it. But sometimes I dont feel like an ace because I read it, does anyone have the same problem as me?

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@asexualityonreddit

I think I am asexual but I don’t know…
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@asexualityonreddit

I doubt it's intentional, but Dan Heng being ace does seem quite possible...
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Dating this guy and he might be ace but he goes from 0 to 100 sexually

We met a little over a month ago. He had a higher body count then me (like most 20 year olds since mine is 1) and had hookups before so I assumed he was into sex. I was even scared he'd leave when I wanted to date for a month or two before having sex.

The first date he was sad I wouldn't kiss him. The second I was still waiting, but we kissed anyways because I was attracted to him. Whenever I brought you sex he would ask if I wanted to go have it right away. If I said no he would ask if we could give each other head instead, or he could finger me whatever. I still said no because it felt weird and abrupt. Iwanted to cuddle for hours at first. Then after a few weeks all the kissing and cuddling stopped when we hungout.

I mentioned this to him and he said I just don't initiate it is all. Well I've been asking him about it, then he said he doesnt like it and never has. I was confused because he was the one trying to at first and he said I was basically SA him. I obviously backed all the way off and said I would never want him to do things with me if he doesn't want to do them. I asked if he just doesn't like me if he didn't want to kiss, cuddle, or have sex and he said he does like me. I've literally never experienced this before normally guys lie about liking you to get sex. I offered to just be friends and he said that's not what he wants.

He said "we can cuddle" and then got mad when I no longer wanted to. He then proceeded to borderline force himself onto me and started rubbing me and kissing really hard. I don't feel assaulted but I could see someone else feeling that way. He was hard too, and kept saying he thought I wanted sex. I said I did but I no longer do because he said he doesn't. Honestly I think it's over since touching him feels like SA, it always feels like he doesn't want it then says I don't intiate. He keeps going from don't touch me to being very tough sexually and I'm starting to get scared

https://redd.it/1o311g3
@asexualityonreddit

Finding love whilst graysexual

Hey so i discovered a few months ago that I am graysexual and it has made my dating life so hard because all people want to do in this generation is the deed.

How do I find someone and keep them when they find out cus im currently talking to someone and when we meet up for the first time he wants to do it but I feel repulsed at the thought of it.

Please help

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@asexualityonreddit

Am I only likeable by people sexually attracted to me?
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@asexualityonreddit

My phone had a system update and now the clock is ace

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Something “wrong” with asexual people

I was talking with a friend and she had an opinion which i’d like to talk about because I find it interesting.

She said that asexual people have some kind of “genetic” failure due to not having an urge to reproduce or such. Of course she said she meant no offense by it (Though I was a bit offended but I let it pass).

I keep thinking about how she may be wrong because, yes, despite us being animals, we really no longer belong in nature and we dont really have any instincts left. So she basically said that we, as animals should have the instinct to reproduce, and that if we dont (refering to asexual people), then there is something wrong with our biology.

I think she is wrong because as I said before, even if we are animals we no longer form part of nature. And despite animals experiencing sexual attraction, I doubt they do the same way as humans do. I know there are animals that purely engage in sex due to pleasure, like some primates. But most animals reproduce in order to survive, pleasure being there as a bonus to reinforce the act, but not the main reason.

I just think humans have differentiated a lot from animals so saying there is something biologically wrong with asexual people for not feeling sexual attraction to another person is a bit weird. Its just not comparable.

Just thought I’d share. Would be interesting to see what other people think!

https://redd.it/1o36ljn
@asexualityonreddit

A questionnaire had my labels

It’s the little things, right? I did some training that included demographic questions as part of a survey.

First, the racial/ethnic options included my background, which almost never happens. It wasn’t even that detailed, about 9 broad options. But I finally got to pick the ones that actually describe me how I usually describe myself. Again, that never happens, and I’ve answered formal demographic questions since I was a young child. I’m in my late 30s now.

Second, the list of orientations (also 9, including ‘other: “please describe”’) included asexual! Right at the top because alphabetical order. I really wasn’t expecting that. This is also something that’s never included when these questions are asked, so I usually select Prefer not to answer.

It was really nice to be able select the correct categories. No aromantic option, but you can’t have it all, I guess. (If I were to improve it, I’d at least say ‘asexual and/or aromantic,’ especially since it’s multiple choice.)

Anyway, just thought I’d share. Things are slowly improving in some ways, in some places. This was through a university, so not as surprising, I suppose. But still surprising to me and was a nice feeling, like, “ah, finally.”

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@asexualityonreddit

Probably gonna regret this but...

Ehi, guys. Hi. So... first of all i am 19, also i don't have much knowledge on these things and i had internet as my only source. I know you can't tell if i am ace just by a description on reddit. But maybe you can give your opinion, since it's probably the best reference i got. Promise i am not ginna take it as pure gold, but an help is always an help. If i found something to add, i am gonna edit my message.

I never was interested in having sex so i am still a virgin. I never had experiences, i am trying to understand if i am asexual also because i don't want to find myself with someone and realize that it's not what i want. I always found penetration repulsive. Every kind of penetration always felt so... unsettling. I have kinks (they don't involve sex) and i find kissing and hugging really romantic and nice. But i also found out asexuality is a spectrum and some aces likes kissing and some don't.

I have ADHD and slight neurodivergence. Does these things can be an influence? Waiting for answers, thank you for your time.

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@asexualityonreddit

Genuine question. Do people who aren’t asexual actually like crap like this…?

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