i hate being ace in the modern world
basically i (21nb) have been an asexual for all my life. ive never really had interest in sex or anything related to that. about a year ago i started going out on dates for the first time in my life and i quickly realized being ace (and nonbinary) is very difficult in dating.
every time ive met a new date ive tried my best being honest about my feelings and my wants but still i feel like im not being heard or taken seriously. i was born female and i absolutely hate my chest being sexualized by the people i go out with. it makes me feel so disgusted.
im constantly wondering if theres any innocent love left in the world or is lust and sex all there is? being in a relationship is so much more than that but no matter how much i do for someone my dates always end up turning me down once they realize im not interested in them that way.
theres a possibility i could be demisexual but i haven't had the chance to connect with someone deep enought to find out because people these days want to get intimate very soon and it turns me off completely.
maybe someone has same kinds of thoughs or has experienced something similar? also if youve found partners who are okay with not doing the deed id like to hear your story!
https://redd.it/1mojqaj
@asexualityonreddit
basically i (21nb) have been an asexual for all my life. ive never really had interest in sex or anything related to that. about a year ago i started going out on dates for the first time in my life and i quickly realized being ace (and nonbinary) is very difficult in dating.
every time ive met a new date ive tried my best being honest about my feelings and my wants but still i feel like im not being heard or taken seriously. i was born female and i absolutely hate my chest being sexualized by the people i go out with. it makes me feel so disgusted.
im constantly wondering if theres any innocent love left in the world or is lust and sex all there is? being in a relationship is so much more than that but no matter how much i do for someone my dates always end up turning me down once they realize im not interested in them that way.
theres a possibility i could be demisexual but i haven't had the chance to connect with someone deep enought to find out because people these days want to get intimate very soon and it turns me off completely.
maybe someone has same kinds of thoughs or has experienced something similar? also if youve found partners who are okay with not doing the deed id like to hear your story!
https://redd.it/1mojqaj
@asexualityonreddit
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Deep Aversion to Sex (Asexual, Religious) — Am I Alone in This?
I’ve been a very religious person and an actual asexual my whole life (26 years M, might not be relevant but conventionally good-looking) — asexual not due to low libido from medication, hormones etc, but simply never having any desire for sexual intimacy. in other words, asexuality is not a phase for me, but a reality and an existence. At 16, while other males/females were keen on going into bed with their sweethearts, I knew I was very different.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve had a deep, visceral disgust toward sexual situations such as — hookup culture, “friends with benefits,” sleeping around, and sex before marriage. This reaction is **the same regardless of whether it’s between gay couples, straight couples, etc**. I don’t feel as strongly about sex within marriage for others (while i still do not want to go through that), so I think my aversion comes from a mix of my asexual orientation, being a prude, my strong religious values regarding 'sex outside marriage'.
Recently, I’ve been increasingly disgusted by how pervasive sexual themes are in media and everyday life. These days I’m just like, *“Are people really that depraved?”* when I see:
* The *Bonnie Blue and 1000 Men* documentary
* The *S-Line* Korean drama showing sexual relationships between friends and colleagues, something I find unsettling because it would mirror what happens in real life, just without the “red lines” being visible to us.
* Public interviews where unmarried straight/gay people casually share and glorify their “body counts” "hookups" or answering interview questions "what position is your favorite, etc." "are you top or bottom"
The whole concept of 'being intimate' is embarrassing for me. And I find hearing about sex deeply repulsive. “Sex sells” culture makes it impossible to avoid. I’ve even worried people might assume I’m heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual — that implies a sexual attraction/action is present.
When I watched the Jubilee video *“Do All Asexuals Think the Same?”*, it really warmed my heart to see others who feel like me. It reminded me I’m not alone.
People might think I’m silly or overreacting. Does anyone else here feel the same or relate to the above?
I don't think a lot of people will understand me and it sucks that there aren't more asexual individuals in a world where most people are thinking about/craving 'sex'. My friends and family would think i am probably silly for feeling that way.
https://redd.it/1mootml
@asexualityonreddit
I’ve been a very religious person and an actual asexual my whole life (26 years M, might not be relevant but conventionally good-looking) — asexual not due to low libido from medication, hormones etc, but simply never having any desire for sexual intimacy. in other words, asexuality is not a phase for me, but a reality and an existence. At 16, while other males/females were keen on going into bed with their sweethearts, I knew I was very different.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve had a deep, visceral disgust toward sexual situations such as — hookup culture, “friends with benefits,” sleeping around, and sex before marriage. This reaction is **the same regardless of whether it’s between gay couples, straight couples, etc**. I don’t feel as strongly about sex within marriage for others (while i still do not want to go through that), so I think my aversion comes from a mix of my asexual orientation, being a prude, my strong religious values regarding 'sex outside marriage'.
Recently, I’ve been increasingly disgusted by how pervasive sexual themes are in media and everyday life. These days I’m just like, *“Are people really that depraved?”* when I see:
* The *Bonnie Blue and 1000 Men* documentary
* The *S-Line* Korean drama showing sexual relationships between friends and colleagues, something I find unsettling because it would mirror what happens in real life, just without the “red lines” being visible to us.
* Public interviews where unmarried straight/gay people casually share and glorify their “body counts” "hookups" or answering interview questions "what position is your favorite, etc." "are you top or bottom"
The whole concept of 'being intimate' is embarrassing for me. And I find hearing about sex deeply repulsive. “Sex sells” culture makes it impossible to avoid. I’ve even worried people might assume I’m heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual — that implies a sexual attraction/action is present.
When I watched the Jubilee video *“Do All Asexuals Think the Same?”*, it really warmed my heart to see others who feel like me. It reminded me I’m not alone.
People might think I’m silly or overreacting. Does anyone else here feel the same or relate to the above?
I don't think a lot of people will understand me and it sucks that there aren't more asexual individuals in a world where most people are thinking about/craving 'sex'. My friends and family would think i am probably silly for feeling that way.
https://redd.it/1mootml
@asexualityonreddit
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Are me and my boyfriend on the ace spectrum?
Me and my boyfriend have been together for over 3 years, and we've never had sex. We've always had attraction towards each other, especially when we first got together but those feelings have sort of simmered down for both of us over time. We still love each other very much, and are very happy together, but everytime we're together we never think about having sex or really doing anything sexual. I just love spending time with him, cuddling and kissing, but I rarely think of doing anything more. And even when I do have those feelings, I feel like I could never act on them, and he feels the same, saying it's scary to think about. Sometimes I feel like we're being a couple wrong, and we only act like close friends and that makes me sad. We love each other so much and wanna spend the rest of our lives together, and both of us would be perfectly fine never having sex. So, are we asexual? Can you be asexual if you experience attraction but don't really want to act on it?
https://redd.it/1mos2hv
@asexualityonreddit
Me and my boyfriend have been together for over 3 years, and we've never had sex. We've always had attraction towards each other, especially when we first got together but those feelings have sort of simmered down for both of us over time. We still love each other very much, and are very happy together, but everytime we're together we never think about having sex or really doing anything sexual. I just love spending time with him, cuddling and kissing, but I rarely think of doing anything more. And even when I do have those feelings, I feel like I could never act on them, and he feels the same, saying it's scary to think about. Sometimes I feel like we're being a couple wrong, and we only act like close friends and that makes me sad. We love each other so much and wanna spend the rest of our lives together, and both of us would be perfectly fine never having sex. So, are we asexual? Can you be asexual if you experience attraction but don't really want to act on it?
https://redd.it/1mos2hv
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Not sure what I am.
Hello! I figured I would ask around in this subreddit to get an answer over something.
I have never considered myself to be asexual and I still don't think I am, but lately I feel like I fall under some kind of related or blanket term to it.
In short, I don't feel arousal. I never get "turned on" or horny or anything like that no matter what happens with me. Doesn't matter if it's with someone I don't know, or someone I'm intensely close with... it's just something I don't ever feel.
Despite this, I don't mind sexual acts. I actually lean heavily into them but it's more because I find it fun and amusing over it being for any sexual pleasure. I could care less about being pleasured, I just enjoy seeing how my partner reacts to what I do. I do get a little bored if things take too long but, still.
I write smut as a hobby and as a freelance way to make money, I enjoy writing it, I like learning more about that stuff. I also still feel sexual attraction but... I don't get aroused if I feel it. It's more of a "Oh they're pretty hot" and not a "Oh I want to have sex with them" kind of thing.
In the committed relationship I am in, while I do indulge my partner in his desires, I ultimately just want to be his biggest supporter. I love spending time with him normally and the idea of sex or whatever never once enters my mind during any of it... and if I do tease him, it's because I like how he reacts and little else.
So I'm just confused. I wouldn't want to give up the sexual stuff I do involve myself with, whether it be the smut I write or the stuff I do with my partner or even the artwork I look at from time to time.
And yet in none of those things do I feel aroused. Even for the artwork I just think it looks nice and nothing beyond that. Even for my partner it's for his enjoyment... and mine too, but mine just comes from the fact he is enjoying it.
So... what am I? I don't think I'm asexual given the other stuff but, I just wanna know if there is even a label for this stuff.
https://redd.it/1moseue
@asexualityonreddit
Hello! I figured I would ask around in this subreddit to get an answer over something.
I have never considered myself to be asexual and I still don't think I am, but lately I feel like I fall under some kind of related or blanket term to it.
In short, I don't feel arousal. I never get "turned on" or horny or anything like that no matter what happens with me. Doesn't matter if it's with someone I don't know, or someone I'm intensely close with... it's just something I don't ever feel.
Despite this, I don't mind sexual acts. I actually lean heavily into them but it's more because I find it fun and amusing over it being for any sexual pleasure. I could care less about being pleasured, I just enjoy seeing how my partner reacts to what I do. I do get a little bored if things take too long but, still.
I write smut as a hobby and as a freelance way to make money, I enjoy writing it, I like learning more about that stuff. I also still feel sexual attraction but... I don't get aroused if I feel it. It's more of a "Oh they're pretty hot" and not a "Oh I want to have sex with them" kind of thing.
In the committed relationship I am in, while I do indulge my partner in his desires, I ultimately just want to be his biggest supporter. I love spending time with him normally and the idea of sex or whatever never once enters my mind during any of it... and if I do tease him, it's because I like how he reacts and little else.
So I'm just confused. I wouldn't want to give up the sexual stuff I do involve myself with, whether it be the smut I write or the stuff I do with my partner or even the artwork I look at from time to time.
And yet in none of those things do I feel aroused. Even for the artwork I just think it looks nice and nothing beyond that. Even for my partner it's for his enjoyment... and mine too, but mine just comes from the fact he is enjoying it.
So... what am I? I don't think I'm asexual given the other stuff but, I just wanna know if there is even a label for this stuff.
https://redd.it/1moseue
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Im not sure exactly what to do here...
Hi! Ive never really posted before so hello but umm yeah. Some background info on me: im a massive people pleaser and have a rough time sticking up for myself and what i need/ defining my boundaries and yeah... But I think I've come to the conclusion that I'm some variation of ace and thats really great and all but I feel like theres no way i can maintain a romantic relationship with any non ace person??? I mean im currently in a relationship and of course hes lovely and so understanding but i still feel this looming weight of ‘well its bound to come up/happen at some point’ I just know sex is not something that I need as a person and thinking about it makes me want to claw my skin off :D but for him its just normal???? I feel like at some point hes going to realize theres someone in the world who would just give that to him but I don't think it can be me and even though I have zero indication of him being any level of upset or frustrated at all with me because of this (hes been very sweet and supportive and honestly perfect but oh well) i cant stop thinking about it and I feel like im going to end up sabatoging a relationship that I absolutely want to keep because on some level I think I feel defective?
Anyways thank you for listening to my slight rant, I think I just needed to say something at all instead of stewing over it again😅
https://redd.it/1moxgpg
@asexualityonreddit
Hi! Ive never really posted before so hello but umm yeah. Some background info on me: im a massive people pleaser and have a rough time sticking up for myself and what i need/ defining my boundaries and yeah... But I think I've come to the conclusion that I'm some variation of ace and thats really great and all but I feel like theres no way i can maintain a romantic relationship with any non ace person??? I mean im currently in a relationship and of course hes lovely and so understanding but i still feel this looming weight of ‘well its bound to come up/happen at some point’ I just know sex is not something that I need as a person and thinking about it makes me want to claw my skin off :D but for him its just normal???? I feel like at some point hes going to realize theres someone in the world who would just give that to him but I don't think it can be me and even though I have zero indication of him being any level of upset or frustrated at all with me because of this (hes been very sweet and supportive and honestly perfect but oh well) i cant stop thinking about it and I feel like im going to end up sabatoging a relationship that I absolutely want to keep because on some level I think I feel defective?
Anyways thank you for listening to my slight rant, I think I just needed to say something at all instead of stewing over it again😅
https://redd.it/1moxgpg
@asexualityonreddit
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Do you guys have any hobbies?
37 F here from the US - discovered I was asexual about 10 years ago.
Just curious: how do you guys spend your free time, if you have any?
For me, I enjoy going to the gym, hiking, trying new recipes, and leather restoration.
What about you guys?
https://redd.it/1mp4uz3
@asexualityonreddit
37 F here from the US - discovered I was asexual about 10 years ago.
Just curious: how do you guys spend your free time, if you have any?
For me, I enjoy going to the gym, hiking, trying new recipes, and leather restoration.
What about you guys?
https://redd.it/1mp4uz3
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Trying to feel validated
I know its normal to be this but somehow i still feel alien to others and then to myself. Ik i should love myself and all but i wonder what it must be to be so into the other person that i would want to put my face anywhere near them in an intimate way lol. Idk just a rant
https://redd.it/1mp65hx
@asexualityonreddit
I know its normal to be this but somehow i still feel alien to others and then to myself. Ik i should love myself and all but i wonder what it must be to be so into the other person that i would want to put my face anywhere near them in an intimate way lol. Idk just a rant
https://redd.it/1mp65hx
@asexualityonreddit
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Whats the difference between sexual and sensual attraction?
Hello friends!
I (35M) am beginning to think Im ace (heteroromantic sex-repulsed, I guess...? still figuring out). Id like to thank you all for this space and for spreading awareness. Im considering debating this with my therapist in the near future (she already suspects Im a closeted gay because I never mention a girlfriend).
I read the FAQ, the wiki index, and the "questioning" pages, and found them super useful. I have a question, tho.
Could you folks please elaborate on the difference between "sexual attraction" and "sensual attraction"? It is not very clear to me.
Thanks again!
https://redd.it/1mp81hd
@asexualityonreddit
Hello friends!
I (35M) am beginning to think Im ace (heteroromantic sex-repulsed, I guess...? still figuring out). Id like to thank you all for this space and for spreading awareness. Im considering debating this with my therapist in the near future (she already suspects Im a closeted gay because I never mention a girlfriend).
I read the FAQ, the wiki index, and the "questioning" pages, and found them super useful. I have a question, tho.
Could you folks please elaborate on the difference between "sexual attraction" and "sensual attraction"? It is not very clear to me.
Thanks again!
https://redd.it/1mp81hd
@asexualityonreddit
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Is this a crime, it's meant to be garlic bread (not burnt by me)
https://redd.it/1mpe7kr
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/1mpe7kr
@asexualityonreddit
Are You Aro (Advice)?
**Hi everyone!**
Welcome to our weekly Advice post about Aromanticism! Aromantic people experience little to no romantic attraction.
**Do any of these resonate with you?**
\* You rarely (if ever) experience crushes on others.
\* You find the idea of a romantic relationship unappealing, and prefer strong platonic bonds.
\* You've been in romantic relationships but felt like you were going through the motions.
\* You've researched what crushes are "supposed" to feel like, but can't relate.
These are just a few signs you might be Aromantic. Aromanticism is a spectrum, and every person's experience is unique.
\*\*Have questions about aromanticism or your own identity?\*\* Ask away in the comments below, and we'll and your fellow Aro’s will do the best to help!
* [**More signs that you are Aro**](https://aromanticguide.com/am-i-aro)
* [**Honeymoon Phase**](https://health.clevelandclinic.org/what-is-the-honeymoon-phase)
* [**Types of attraction (might be incomplete)**](https://types-of-attraction.carrd.co/)
https://redd.it/1mpgiiq
@asexualityonreddit
**Hi everyone!**
Welcome to our weekly Advice post about Aromanticism! Aromantic people experience little to no romantic attraction.
**Do any of these resonate with you?**
\* You rarely (if ever) experience crushes on others.
\* You find the idea of a romantic relationship unappealing, and prefer strong platonic bonds.
\* You've been in romantic relationships but felt like you were going through the motions.
\* You've researched what crushes are "supposed" to feel like, but can't relate.
These are just a few signs you might be Aromantic. Aromanticism is a spectrum, and every person's experience is unique.
\*\*Have questions about aromanticism or your own identity?\*\* Ask away in the comments below, and we'll and your fellow Aro’s will do the best to help!
* [**More signs that you are Aro**](https://aromanticguide.com/am-i-aro)
* [**Honeymoon Phase**](https://health.clevelandclinic.org/what-is-the-honeymoon-phase)
* [**Types of attraction (might be incomplete)**](https://types-of-attraction.carrd.co/)
https://redd.it/1mpgiiq
@asexualityonreddit
Me when people say they want a big boy to come by their house
https://redd.it/1mpcahl
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/1mpcahl
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Romantic Desire as an Asexual?? Does anyone get it? Help me out here.
Hello. I am a Cis Asexual Soft Tomboy Butch; Dyke Lesbian as anyone who is one.
Now my attraction is like anyone; you don’t know why; you just do and; or are.
Yes; I am attracted to Big ish Masculine Mullet-y Nonbinary Butch; Dyke lesbians with no chest, the pronouns are changed; but the rest is still as woman as it was.
I keep having dreams about being in the lap of a Big ish Masculine Mullet-y Nonbinary Butch; Dyke lesbian with no chest, the pronouns are changed; but the rest is still as woman as it was leaning in to them as I fall sleep.
With that said…
Does that mean I only have Romantic Desire? I mean, because I don’t want the sex part and I still find them ones attractive as all hell.
https://redd.it/1mpi0zd
@asexualityonreddit
Hello. I am a Cis Asexual Soft Tomboy Butch; Dyke Lesbian as anyone who is one.
Now my attraction is like anyone; you don’t know why; you just do and; or are.
Yes; I am attracted to Big ish Masculine Mullet-y Nonbinary Butch; Dyke lesbians with no chest, the pronouns are changed; but the rest is still as woman as it was.
I keep having dreams about being in the lap of a Big ish Masculine Mullet-y Nonbinary Butch; Dyke lesbian with no chest, the pronouns are changed; but the rest is still as woman as it was leaning in to them as I fall sleep.
With that said…
Does that mean I only have Romantic Desire? I mean, because I don’t want the sex part and I still find them ones attractive as all hell.
https://redd.it/1mpi0zd
@asexualityonreddit
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Why I No Longer Identify as Asexual/Aromantic - Here's My Story
So, a huge disclaimer on this post, I don't intend to be aphobic or offend anyone, this is simply my story. I'm not trying to insinuate that every instance of identifying as ace is a phase, (though in my case, it was). I'm making this post because I've seen a lot of posts from minors -- or otherwise very young people -- that are confused and looking for a label. I'm here to warn people about the potential harm of labeling yourself too soon and the pressure that can come from it.
When I was young (around five years old) I began treatment for precocious puberty (starting puberty too soon), and used puberty blockers until I was about nine or ten. During that time, I can't recall ever having a crush on a boy -- or anyone for that matter -- and I felt super isolated and couldn't understand why I didn't feel the way the other girls did. Looking back now, it was likely a side effect of the blockers, but being that young, the thought never crossed my mind. Like I said, it was difficult at first, but before long, I started to embrace it. As a young girl in elementary and middle school, I liked feeling "different" and seeing the stunned reactions of other people when I told them I'd never had a crush before. By the end of middle school however, that was a flat-out lie.
My eighth grade year was done entirely online due to Covid, and during that isolation, I was spending more and more time online, and was swept up in confusion surrounding my sexuality with all the different labels and brightly-colored flags. This also coincided with one of the worst years of my life -- being so isolated and all. I started to question if the one crush I had had previously was even real or considered a crush; as I found many different definitions and emotions associated with them. By the time I went back to school in freshman year, I didn't just think, I knew I was asexual in some way or at the very least queer. Or at least, I wanted to be.
Still seeking to be different and wanting attention from others, I continued to lie. I pretended like I had no idea what it meant or how it felt to find someone attractive or develop a crush on them. Being so young, it was easy, as I hadn't developed enough yet; and the one crush I did have didn't really "count." At this point, my lie started to become my truth as I convinced myself more and more -- continuing to write off any instance of attraction as an immediate reflex, "Oh, I just like his outfit," or, "Oh, I just like his music/movies" (in the case of a celebrity crush). I suppressed my emotions so much because, 1. I wanted to be different. and 2. I was never comfortable with the idea that someone could have an influence over me like that. I viewed it negatively -- like it was a weakness to have a crush.
Eventually, I told this lie to my two friends. Their ears perked up, and they gave me what I was looking for -- they slapped the label "Asexual" on me immediately; I was fourteen. Being with that label made me feel high and mighty -- holier than thou over everyone else. Girls would complain about their crush and I'd say, "Huh, that's weird, I don't have that problem." I was very much asking, "Am I cool yet?"
I spent a lot of time online and determined for myself that I was Aromantic too -- once again, feeling better than everyone else even among asexuals. I felt it was "cheating" to not be aromantic. By this point, it was real to me. Something about having a label and a community completely silenced the part of my brain keeping me tethered to reality -- the part that would remind me I was lying to my peers. I constantly monitored myself and picked apart every glance I stole towards a guy; I'd tell myself it wasn't attraction because "I don't do that," and suppressed, suppressed, suppressed. I thought emotions that were actually normal were signs of asexuality, and the groups I was a part of both online and off only affirmed that. Things like being afraid to have sex, or being afraid to kiss a guy, are completely normal for young
So, a huge disclaimer on this post, I don't intend to be aphobic or offend anyone, this is simply my story. I'm not trying to insinuate that every instance of identifying as ace is a phase, (though in my case, it was). I'm making this post because I've seen a lot of posts from minors -- or otherwise very young people -- that are confused and looking for a label. I'm here to warn people about the potential harm of labeling yourself too soon and the pressure that can come from it.
When I was young (around five years old) I began treatment for precocious puberty (starting puberty too soon), and used puberty blockers until I was about nine or ten. During that time, I can't recall ever having a crush on a boy -- or anyone for that matter -- and I felt super isolated and couldn't understand why I didn't feel the way the other girls did. Looking back now, it was likely a side effect of the blockers, but being that young, the thought never crossed my mind. Like I said, it was difficult at first, but before long, I started to embrace it. As a young girl in elementary and middle school, I liked feeling "different" and seeing the stunned reactions of other people when I told them I'd never had a crush before. By the end of middle school however, that was a flat-out lie.
My eighth grade year was done entirely online due to Covid, and during that isolation, I was spending more and more time online, and was swept up in confusion surrounding my sexuality with all the different labels and brightly-colored flags. This also coincided with one of the worst years of my life -- being so isolated and all. I started to question if the one crush I had had previously was even real or considered a crush; as I found many different definitions and emotions associated with them. By the time I went back to school in freshman year, I didn't just think, I knew I was asexual in some way or at the very least queer. Or at least, I wanted to be.
Still seeking to be different and wanting attention from others, I continued to lie. I pretended like I had no idea what it meant or how it felt to find someone attractive or develop a crush on them. Being so young, it was easy, as I hadn't developed enough yet; and the one crush I did have didn't really "count." At this point, my lie started to become my truth as I convinced myself more and more -- continuing to write off any instance of attraction as an immediate reflex, "Oh, I just like his outfit," or, "Oh, I just like his music/movies" (in the case of a celebrity crush). I suppressed my emotions so much because, 1. I wanted to be different. and 2. I was never comfortable with the idea that someone could have an influence over me like that. I viewed it negatively -- like it was a weakness to have a crush.
Eventually, I told this lie to my two friends. Their ears perked up, and they gave me what I was looking for -- they slapped the label "Asexual" on me immediately; I was fourteen. Being with that label made me feel high and mighty -- holier than thou over everyone else. Girls would complain about their crush and I'd say, "Huh, that's weird, I don't have that problem." I was very much asking, "Am I cool yet?"
I spent a lot of time online and determined for myself that I was Aromantic too -- once again, feeling better than everyone else even among asexuals. I felt it was "cheating" to not be aromantic. By this point, it was real to me. Something about having a label and a community completely silenced the part of my brain keeping me tethered to reality -- the part that would remind me I was lying to my peers. I constantly monitored myself and picked apart every glance I stole towards a guy; I'd tell myself it wasn't attraction because "I don't do that," and suppressed, suppressed, suppressed. I thought emotions that were actually normal were signs of asexuality, and the groups I was a part of both online and off only affirmed that. Things like being afraid to have sex, or being afraid to kiss a guy, are completely normal for young