Felt this fits here
https://redd.it/1orfxt4
@asexualityonreddit

My partner is asexual but i am not- i need advice

My partner (ftm20) and i (f20) have been dating for a little over two months, and im realizing that the level of intimacy i want and the level he’s okay with are vastly different, and i really want to support his wishes but i also crave that physical connection and im not sure how to go about keeping him comfortable without sending myself into depression. I love him so much and i really want what’s best for him, but I have to think about myself too, and it feels like an intrusion to ask him about the limits, so i was wondering if any of you seasoned asexuals could give me some advice on this. :)

https://redd.it/1orh10x
@asexualityonreddit

Ace neck strap for my 90s film camera
https://redd.it/1orbwxc
@asexualityonreddit

Can someone turn asexual

Idk if I am or not but I get grossed out by sex now,
I used to have it a lot in my 20s up till I was like 35 and then I met a girl online that scared me and she be became creepy and obsessed with me I haven’t done it or met anyone ever since so idk 🤷

Haven’t had sex in 5 years or dated anyone


Sex grosses me out now idk why


https://redd.it/1orfnud
@asexualityonreddit

Am I really aromantic?

So I have been questioning for a while now.

AM I REALLY AROMANTIC?

I ask this because I was talking to my mom (who is very accepting of my sexuality) but she really got me thinking about some things. I do want a relationship one day, I would like to grow old with someone. To me it looks like a live in best friend. We sleep in the same room together maybe even the same bed, we go to dinners together, we go to the movies, we really do everything together.

It's just I don't like physical affection no hugging, kissing, touching, cuddling, I don't want to smell your skin, even words like baby, honey, and bae etc. Yeah no just call me by my name. 😭

But my mom was saying that hanging around someone, wanting to be in their presence, thinking of them is a form of romance so maybe I am not aromantic?

Maybe I just experience romance differently?

I feel as if many aromatics don't want a relationship at all but I definitely do so I don't know.

https://redd.it/1ork5x2
@asexualityonreddit

Aces of reddit: What is your toxic trait?

I'm curious. What do y'all feel like it's your toxic trait (or biggest red flag, if you will)

I'm the last one to judge of course, I just felt like it's an interesting question. Imma answer it too, of course:

For me, it's my possessiveness, if you can call it that. Or not really possessiveness, but I get jealous very easily, am overall just clingy and have seperation anxiety and stuff like that, hard to explain. And while there are supposedly some people who like that, I personally haven't met anyone lol.

https://redd.it/1orml4v
@asexualityonreddit

Why sex?

I never really understood why people are having sex. I always was disgusted by it, at first I thought it was because my first contact with sex was when I heard about r@pe in the media when I was 5 or something. But now I understand that everyone is just different. People like sex because it's pleasurable but when I think about it I just think that it's really unhygienic. I don't want some body liquid from someone else in my bed or on me. And touching eachother's private parts?? Ewww, it smells so bad. I always thought it was pretty disgusting and when people told me about it my brain was just horrified: "No way! People real do something THAT unhygienic and they enjoy it??"

Is some of your guys' first thought also how unhygienic it is when thinking about sex?

https://redd.it/1ornq17
@asexualityonreddit

[OC] Sneaky crow

https://redd.it/1orqg45
@asexualityonreddit

To all asexual/aroace people here who have never been in a relationship… do you feel insecure?

I’m happy with being aroace. I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything. It’s a part of my identity that I’m proud of. Yet, I can’t help but wonder… since I’ve never been in a relationship, and no one has ever attempted to start one with me, is there something unlikeable about me? Am I ugly and I just don’t know it? Do I not mesh well with other people?

Maybe weird post, but I just wanted to know if any of you guys feel the same, and if some of you do, how you guys deal with these feelings. I’m happy with being single for life, but these thoughts keep nagging at me.

Thanks for reading.

https://redd.it/1orn174
@asexualityonreddit

lol my name is allo(like allosexuality) and i’m Asexual
https://redd.it/1orswb8
@asexualityonreddit

Anyone here struggles with sexual intrusive thoughts?




Yeah, i feel so uncomfortable today again. And i don’t wan’t to feel like i am the only one in this world who struggles with it ( bc i hate it )


I struggle with intrusive thoughts AT NIGHT. Mostly at night i daydream so it can be easy for me to sleep faster
.

But now i can’t because my brain ruins it.

Like…. STOP

I kept doing this over and over again the whole night

And the worst part is that it felted so real. Like…. i am genuinely scared right now



Idk how to explain it. When this unwanted thought came, i kept having groinal responce and intrusive urges…..


Like…bro this is terrifying.

I am even afraid of calling them groinal responce/intrusive urges because what if i am just saying that to repress my actual urges and sexual desire/attraction?



I don’t want that.


And i kept going to stupid searches on how to know if it is just OCD or actual repression.


The only signs they gaved me is that people with repression have thoughts that they desire but unconsciously push it away

And OCD have unwanted thoughts that they find it distressing.



Which made me even more stressed because i don’t know if i desired the thoughts and tried to unconsciously push it away or if it is actually unwanted thoughts.



Because my whole fear IS trying to push away sexual fantasies that i desire ( even though my thoughts aren’t enjoyable )



I usually push the thoughts away because they GENUINELY annoy me. It makes me feel uncomfortable. And it makes it even worse when it feels real.


Idk how to explain it. It is how your brain kind of convince you that you did like it, and then you get these weird sensations that makes it feel real everytime your brain convinces you that you do
which makes it worse because it makes it seem like you ‘’ liked it ‘’ but you didn’t.


It makes it worse for me to explain it because anytime i actually say that i genuinely did not like it whether these sensations that makes it feel real and groinal responce.

I would get these thoughts that goes ‘’ you are just saying that to deny that you are repressing sexual attractions, desires and urges. You are trying to convince yourself you aren’t but you are and it shows that you are because you wouldn’t have these sensations in the first place ‘’



I hate this so much because sexual repression/supression and shame are GENUIENLY AGAINST MY MORALS.


I know sexual attraction is okay, i know craving someones body is okay, i know having sexual urges and desires are okay. IT IS BASIC KNOLEDGE.


There is literally nothing wrong with them

But i am STILL AFRAID of somehow repressing them out of fear even though i don’t find it scary. I know it is normal.

And it is okay to feel it but i am afraid of somehow repressing them because i keep getting thoughts that i don’t enjoy nor want pop in my head and then makes it FEEL REAL.



I hate it so much i want it gone.

Sometimes i feel like allosexuals have it easy because they don’t doubt if they are repressing sexual attraction because they ACTUALLY FEEL IT. They don’t question it


And i am here developping a fear of sexual repression

Because i am afraid of somehow denying that i am an allo by forcing myself to not feel sexual attraction……



This is hell. Absolute fricking hell



https://redd.it/1orrbpt
@asexualityonreddit

I hate being ace

Im an adult sex repulsed asexual f. I've never wanted to do those things with anyone before. I have done them anyway in past relationships because I felt like I had to. But it had a horrible horrible affect on my mental health and self image. I absolutely hate sex.
But I am very capable of loving and having feelings for people. I want a partner. But in addition to nobody i like liking me back. Even if they did. There not ace.
Its so frustrating and I wish I could just be normal and have a normal relationship like everyone else. But I seriously cannot tolerate a sexual relationship, and that just has to be part of it for everyone but me.
I keep hearing people say asexuality isn't a disorder, but i feel like there has to be something wrong with me. Hormonally, neurologically, something. But i know this will never change. And i dont think im ever gonna be able to stop hating myself for it.

https://redd.it/1orrzmz
@asexualityonreddit