My partner is sex neutral to sex repulsed and an SA survivor. Any books or resources I can read to better understand them?

I want my partner to not have to explain themselves constantly to me. I do know about asexuality etc but I’m yet to learn its nuances. So, if anyone knows any resources, please do let me know, thank you :)

https://redd.it/1ngl8g2
@asexualityonreddit

After 5 or less years, I have FINALLY FOUND MY ASEXUALITY 😭😭😭😭😭
https://redd.it/1nggn44
@asexualityonreddit

DENMARK IS FIGHTING BACK!!
https://redd.it/1ngnbwz
@asexualityonreddit

DENMARK IS FIGHTING BACK!!
https://redd.it/1ngnba6
@asexualityonreddit

THEY ARE FIGHTING BACK!!!
https://redd.it/1ngndie
@asexualityonreddit

Help me process my feels

I need help processing my feels for several reasons. The biggest one is I’m on the spectrum so I like to outsource these things to the normies 😅 I’m in a relatively new marriage. While we dated I was open and honest about my sexuality (asexual but heteroromantic) and neurodivergence. And we both connected and fell in love.

We both made consensual concessions in regards to sex in our relationship. But I struggle with a capital S. I’m not sex repulsed by any means, I just don’t know how to engage or seduce or flirt. I’m missing those files in my root menu.

So we discussed an opening of the relationship on her side for sexual needs. We talked, discussed, researched, therapy’d. And intellectually I’m on board. Truly and honestly.

But as she’s been going out on dates, my emotions and mental states indicate that subconsciously I am not okay. So what do I do? How do I get my intellect and my heart in alignment? How do I figure out why I’m not okay? Because I don’t know why.

https://redd.it/1ngtpx1
@asexualityonreddit

drew the aro+ace flags as characters!:)

https://redd.it/1ngxh9t
@asexualityonreddit

Ugh
https://redd.it/1nh0ic7
@asexualityonreddit

saying you don't like something, magically makes everyone push it onto you (comci by me)
https://redd.it/1nh0i6o
@asexualityonreddit

Weird question, can you feel hot towards someone without it being sexual attraction?

The reason why i am asking this is bc i have searched on things abt sexual attraction and it says that when you are attracted to someone sexually, you Will feel hot. ( it was also told that to me on someone who dm’ed me for some reason Idk ) Btw, when i mean feeling hot towards someone, i mean like, you feel hot, like….how the sun hits you ig….i think thats how they meant it???

And i thought ‘’ hm, so its like blushing? ‘’ bc when someone blushes, they Will feel hot on their cheek. But idk if its sexual bc i thought someone can feel hot towards someone bc they feel awkward or shy around them? Idk man. Maybe km wierd with attractions, my apologies.

And this made me ask a question to myself bc….idk

I thought ‘’ can it happen that someone can feel hot towards someone without sexual attraction? ‘’

Which sounds stupid….

But i am still curious abt it since Idk how sexual attraction exactly works

So yeah, Thats why i asked here. Can asexuals feel that without sexual attraction? Or is it not possible?

Again my apologies for the weird question, i just wanna know.

Edit: i would like to inform something abt my post since some ppl might misunderstand it.

I am asking if asexuals can feel hot towards someone without sexual attraction. Like…actually feeling hot. Like for example, the sun hitting you and it feels hot kind of way. Idk.

I am not asking if asexuals find ppl hot.

Which can cause some misunderstanding which is…Understandable, i didnt explain it well ig.

https://redd.it/1nh2q1b
@asexualityonreddit

Found a detergent for us
https://redd.it/1nh337f
@asexualityonreddit

Where’d the meme that us asexuals like garlic bread come from?

https://redd.it/1nh5yj9
@asexualityonreddit

Garlic bread
https://redd.it/1nh7neo
@asexualityonreddit

Marshmallow Bunnies - Art by Me.

https://redd.it/1nh91k2
@asexualityonreddit