People on Telegram were unsurprised about this news. I, however, was very surprised.

Hello, I have arrived and I am bringing gifts. It is malwares.

Each VirusSign block contains 3,000 malwares. Each InTheWild block contains 25,000 malwares.

If my math is correct this is approx. 98,000 malwares.

- Virussign.2025.09.07
- Virussign.2025.09.08
- Virussign.2025.09.09
- Virussign.2025.09.10
- Virussign.2025.09.11
- Virussign.2025.09.12
- Virussign.2025.09.13
- Virussign.2025.09.14
- Virussign.2025.09.15
- Virussign.2025.09.16
- Virussign.2025.09.17
- Virussign.2025.09.18
- Virussign.2025.09.19
- Virussign.2025.09.20
- Virussign.2025.09.21
- Virussign.2025.09.22
- InTheWild.0211
- InTheWild.0212

Please download the malwares and stare at them longly and passionately.

I gotta add some more papers n shit too. Add some other stuff too, or something. I've got a bottle of Tylenol extra strength. Gonna lock in tomorrow and push some crazy updates.

Love you all
- smelly smellington

Also, I'm surprised X still uses the Twitter authentication subdomain for Okta. But I guess, "X.Okta-dot-com" wasn't available.

One time some SANS nerds low-key talked to me about doing SANS stuff

They told me I couldn't be a degenerate with the constant swearing, weird cat memes, chain smoking, dark jokes, looking homeless, etc

I can't change who I am dawg. I guess I'm a loser forever

At the end of the day all I have is my son, my wife, my family, and my soul

Can't sell my soul for money. Can't pretend to be something I'm not just for money (I'm a degenerate nerd)

That's why still don't monetize this shit and just beg for money like a bum

Earlier today I made a post about the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation performing an offensive security operation against Telegram.

This was incorrect. I'll explain why.

The document begins with the FBI Philadelphia office requesting permission from the United States Federal Courts to perform a "remote access search", which typically, for a lack of a better word, is "hacking". This coincided with what the report later described as Telegram not cooperating with them.

However, this is misleading and/or partially incorrect. I can't tell if maybe the FBI agent is inaccurately describing what they intend on doing, or if they're vastly over simplifying to the courts their objective, but basically they want to decrypt the Telegram messages... or maybe this is the court legal nomenclature for analyzing encrypted data? I don't know.

Anyway

The paperwork says the FBI will remotely retrieve messages... But the messages are local ... Are they not?

In the court paperwork some individuals were distributing CSAM (Child Sexual Abuse Material). The court documents go into horrific details on the footage discovered. It is sickening. The people distributing the content have already been arrested. Over 1,100 CSAM videos have been retrieved from social media profiles and the perpetrators MEGA.

Included in this is CSAM on infant children.

It concludes with them describing software suites, such as Cellebrite, to analyze the Telegram message content. This conflicts with headlines and initial court documents which suggest this is "remote".

I'll have to read it closer to understand what the fuck they're talking about because it confused me. I'll also share the official court document later on too

When you make an oopsie doopsies from not reading closely enough in front of 400,000 people it sucks

You get booed, people throw tomatoes at you, kids point and laugh at you, even my dog wont look at me. He said, "wow, you're so dumb, you need to be more careful with what you say online. You have a large audience and miscalculations and missteps like this can have real world ramifications."

I said wtf why is my dog speaking German

You don't have to write super sophisticated malware with 9000 different evasion techniques

Just name it important_file.pdf.exe and have it prompt for UAC. They'll probably allow it

Lots of drama on the internet today with Bug Bounty Nerds and HackOne

Bug Bounty Nerds are saying HackerOne is ran by Zionists, or something, and saying HackerOne is Islamophobic, or something

I don't know the whole lore behind this and I don't know the main characters arguing back and forth. It feels like I've walked into the shit show in the middle of season two of the anime.

Will report back if I understand what's going on (I probably won't report back, but people keeping tagging me).

tldr watching nerds fight and have no idea wtf is going on (I'm scared and confused but also nosey)

This image got censored on Xitter for violence, or something. Makes zero sense. There was footage of the Charlie Kirk assassination all over Xitter and literally nothing was censored. You'd be scrolling and accidentally find the murder video, yet they block a cartoon meme with ms-paint blood

Wtf are they doing over there

cybersecurity

The volume of updates I've pushed to the malware library far exceed Xitter limits. I also don't want to do Xitter articles for it. I'll instead push them to VX FEED Discord.

This Discord is straight business. There is no memeing, silly posts, or talking allowed.