Inside out would be a rated R movie if the protagonist was a 12 yearold boy
A television channel playing "The Lion King" on Father's Day is the equivalent of playing "Bambi" on Mother's Day.
The creators of The Truman Show must have gone through hell to stop Truman from masturbating all the time.
If rich people were sent to the same prisons as everyone else, the prison system would be fixed real fast.
The worst part about TV ads isn’t the ads themselves, it’s that they keep playing the same ones over and over again.
There comes a time in every man’s life when MILF porn is just watching a woman your own age fuck.
When a person is really attractive but hides a terrible personality, they’re basically real-life click bait.
Women in razor ads are always shown shaving their already hairless legs.
When you’re standing on grass and look directly down, you can see the soil in between the blades. When you look at the field of grass in front of you, you only see the blades. From a distance, the grass is always greener.
Killing yourself before reaching 18 years old is like quiting a game before even finishing its tutorial
If Assassin's Creed keeps going up through time it'll eventually just become Splinter Cell.
The fact that millions of years of evolution have lead up to us being able to share with anybody in the world the thoughts we had whilst standing under a water flow is pretty incredible.
In a few hundred years, if Google Earth still exists, people will be able to see documented time lapses of how the world has changed
If you do something for 8 hours a day almost every day, it's an addiction. Unless you get paid for it, then it's a job.
It's ironic that plastic surgery is common for hollywood stars who tell us to embrace our unique features
Hot chocolate, chocolate milk, and a chocolate milkshake are all basically the same drink at different temperatures.
Maybe the reason super villains always spill their evil plan is because the want someone to talk to.
A temporary tattoo on a child is basically just a “last washed” indicator.
We rarely remember dreams in real life, and rarely remember real life in our dreams.