Sears has been going out of business longer than Uber and Instagram have existed.

"That 70's Show" premiered August 1998 - 28 years after 1970. If a hypothetical "That 90's Show" were to air with the same offset, it would premiere 2 months from now.

You've seen more of the moon than you'll ever see of the Earth

George Washington died in 1799. The first dinosaur fossil was discovered in 1824. George Washington never knew dinosaurs existed.

Depression and anxiety is a bit like radiation. There’s always a little bit in the background; but not enough to kill you. Then, once in a while, you get a free trip to Chernobyl.

Lava is basically the earth's blood that eventually becomes a scab.

One of the best feelings is actually remembering what you were going to say.

No Disney Princess will probably ever come close to matching Mulan's kill count. The chick straight up buried so many Huns ALIVE on that snowy mountain.

Adults think it's disrespectful when you don't let them disrespect you

Going to sleep when you’re not feeling well is like turning your body off and back on again to see if it fixes the problem

Maybe the reason why some of us stay up late at night and sleep all through the day is because we were meant to live on the other side of the planet.

Setting the bar really low in a game of limbo is actually setting the bar really high.

Before the invention of cameras, no one had ever seen themselves with their eyes closed.

Aliens invaded the Moon on July 20th, 1969.

We are closer to the last Pharoah of Egypt, than he was to the first Pharoah.

You can usually tell a person's tech proficiency by how they phrase their Google searches

When AI gets really smart it’ll be smart enough to not reveal how smart it is.

People say that if you practice an activity for 21 days streak it becomes a habit. However, being woken up 7665 times in the morning, 21 YO still struggle with that.

If you're wearing cowboy clothes, you're ranch dressing.

Whenever we imagine the 1910s-50s we see it in black and white, but whenever we imagine prehistoric times, we see it in color.

Society diagnoses sociopathy as a dangerous thing while promoting the traits that come with it. Be the best at what you do, believe in yourself, think for yourself, don't worry what others think, overcome all obstacles in your way, ignore or outmatch the competition, be the captain of your domain.