Running away from your problems never helps unless you are overweight.
If youโre not supposed to do something while pregnant (smoke, drink, caffeine, sit or stand for extended period of time, eat raw meats) then it probably isnโt very healthy for you even when youโre not pregnant.
Forwarded from Reuben
"yea" is a typo of "yes" that just got accepted.
There is a alternative universe where every coin toss in history was Heads and the scients can't explain why.
Forwarded from Deleted Account
Anxiety is like perpetually hearing the Boss/Enemy music but never seeing the Threat.
Itโs a good thing farts arenโt contagious like yawning is. That would be terrible for everybody,
Dogs can't sweat, they pant So if a dog were to wear sweat pants, they'd be pant pants
Maybe actually plants are the ones farming humans, growing us with oxygen until we die and then being absorbed by them when we are buried.
Paper towel in a microwave is to aluminum foil in an oven as aluminum foil in a microwave is to paper towel in an oven.
The people who take advantage of nice people are the first ones to question them when they are no longer nice.
๐1
Millions of innocent cats have been held up in the air because of Lion King.
Dogs protect humans from other humans. Humans protect dogs from other dogs.
If they'd just print the directions on the sauce packet, we wouldn't have to throw away the Mac & Cheese box four times.
One day sex robots are going to be so advanced they might just start fucking each other and not humans
Aging is the continual process of realizing what an idiot you were a few years ago.
Imagine being naked in a room with people speaking different language and they all want to touch you. Thats the life of a dog