Technically, only change is cold and hard cash.

The only way to get through life is to become crazy

We look back at past societies like they were dumbasses. Imagine people looking back on us 2000 years in the future.

You realize how much you value pockets the second you realize the pants you have on don’t have any

To people in 1923, 2023 is utterly unrecognisable and was impossible to predict. 2123 will be unrecognisable to us and is impossible to predict.

Bar stools in bars are drunkenness tests. If you fall off the stool you are too drunk to serve.

In fps games your character doesn’t blink.

The sun has never actually risen or set

A telephone makes sound travel faster than sound.

Strict vegans shouldn't use anything oil powered or made of oil (like plastic) because it comes from dino bones.

Freckles are nature's glitter.

Dating apps only make money off single people, so their entire profit model is to keep everyone single.

So the Titanic is being shown again in theatres on Valentine's day. Nothing says Valentine's day like a man drowning in cold water on a sinking ship.

In limbo, setting the bar too low is the same as setting the bar too high.

People cover their laptop cameras for fear of hackers, but never their phone cameras.

Bird photography is the closest IRL thing to collecting Pokémons

Winter is the only season that happens twice a year

66% of multi-billion dollar movies have featured Zoe Saldana painted blue or green

It is better to be left-handed when fighting, since right-handed people aren't used to lefties, giving the lefty an advantage, and lefties aren't used to each other, giving neither an advantage.

People not wanting to work for little pay is a problem which can actually be fixed simply by throwing money at it.

Growing overweight is, in part, due to having an efficient, survival-oriented metabolism.