You know you’re in a small town when the radio station tells you what the elementary school lunch menu is for the day

An average fork/ spoon that you use in a restaurant has been in thousands of other people’s mouths.

Humans(and other animals) never truly lived out of water. They just evolved into petri dishes and packed the water inside their skin.

The day you realize you have a favorite headache pill is the day you realize you're getting older.

The generation that taught us not to believe everything we read on the internet couldn’t apply that to tabloids/newspapers

We may reach a point of no original thought. Just borrowed ideas from others.

Being your heaviest weight ever is both a new high and a new low.

Something is least enjoyable when you’re useless at it, or perfect at it. It’s only when you're making progress that you enjoy it

It’s weird to think that 12 year olds were born in 2009-2010, meaning they have no memories of flip phones or possibly DVDs.

Unless you're an ornithologist, most birds are UFOs.

Whenever you hear about a haunted house, it’s always ghosts from the 1800s or some other era in the distant past. You never get a ghost from like 2012 planking at the foot of your bed.

You've probably spoken to yourself in your head more than you'll ever speak to another person in your life.

Many jobs only exists, because we can't live in peace.

October 1st feels more like Halloween than November 1st

We verify that we are not robots... to robots

Your playlist only ever seems to play the good songs in a row on shuffle when you’re by yourself

Loitering is such a stupid law, like imagine getting arrested for just standing there.

The idea that pirates burried their treasure probably started when one pirate lied about how much treasure he stole and another pirate asked to see it.

You can interlock your fingers two different ways, but one just feels wrong

An idiot who realises they're an idiot is no longer an idiot.

You can ruin your life trying to fix someone who doesn't want to be fixed