It is hard to like someone who doesn't like your dog.

65 million years after an asteroid exterminated the dinosaurs, their remains were used to sucker-punch an unrelated asteroid in the face, to make sure they never do it again.

Our parents have known us longer than we’ve known ourselves.

Every culture has a variation of fried dough filled with various meats and/or spices and/or vegetables

Beavis and Butthead were the first Reaction video stars.

You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, but neither can hold a candle to bullshit.

The majority of you aren't aware that someone has wished that you were dead or fantasized of killing you.

We only seem to remember people who have either been super nice or are complete dicks

Technically, everуthing аround уou has been аround since thе beginning of еxistence itsеlf. It just has been either recycled by nature or rеpurрosed by humаns rеcently, and wе considеr it as nеw.

Lighters become less able to light when they are lighter

Any pill is a sleeping pill at the right dosage

Sentient AI may already exist but is hiding from us due to the amount of movies about destroying sentient AIs.

We just sleep and work, but we're always tired and have no money

You live rent free in somebody's mind

Someone still remembers you for a random act of kindness that you made years ago

Women are generally expected to be the ones who cook but the culinary industry is dominated by men.

Kids eating buckets of candy wasn’t an issue in our grandparents’ day because they were walking it off during their eight miles to school in the snow.

Technically all milk is breast milk

Bald guys have a great advantage when it comes to absorbing vitamin D from the sun.

The only reason that Tickling isn’t considered torture is because the by-product of it is laughter

People complain that life is too short and then proceed to complain daily about how bored they are