Most of those AOL CD's you used to get still exist in a landfill somewhere

For most people, the smoke detector is more of an annoyance than a convenience.

Since you never died, there’s a chance of you are immortal

Wolverine probably still has his wisdom teeth.

Kids are terrible at telling stories, which makes listening to them hard, but they can’t get better without practice which required parental patience.

The goal of going to therapy is to eventually stop going to therapy

When speaking in ASL your body language is your accent.

Maybe death feels like what it felt like before we existed.

Morticians have seen more naked people than a normal person

Cardiac surgeons don't get a lot of one-star reviews

Superheros must at some point get bored of their outfit.

Covering a small pet with your hand turns you into it’s heated weighted blanket

Straight men sometimes have trouble telling whether or not other men are handsome

The world is divided in two categories

In the Toy Story universe the Muppets probably sound and act different than they're portrayed on TV.

The most intimacy most men receive is when their barber shaves the back of their neck

People are more closely related to whales than koalas

Gay people don’t have to deal with the frustrations of not understanding the opposite gender

Humans are the most technologically advanced species in nature, yet our first thought when we discover something new is what we have to do to eat it.

There is someone in the world with the exact same voice as you but you might not even notice it even if you meet them since you don’t hear yourself the same way and as frequently as others hear you.

Working remote has really cut down on the amount of people holding in a shit during work