Anything that detaches from the human body instantly becomes gross.

If you are utterly embarrassed by yourself when you were younger you are definitely growing as a person

In just 2-3 decades we went from working hard to find reliable information, to instant information at our finger tips, to working hard to find reliable information again.

Eyeballs and Testicles are pretty close to the same volume, and could theoretically fit in each other’s locations.

Most of us masturbate to a circuit processing 0s and 1s

Eating your whole plate of food never actually helped any children in poor countries.

If a bread factory burns down at one point during the process it can be considered a toast factory

Vegans could technically eat human meat because a person can verbally consent.

You can masturbate to climax but you cannot tickle yourself to laugh

The more you know, the less you speak.

Espionage/heist movies never show the bloody elbows and kneecaps people would get from crawling through air ducts, which are usually held together by unshielded screws through the sheet metal.

If humans could fly, they'd consider it exercise and still probably never do it.

There's a certain poetic beauty to not being able to really capture a sunset on your phone. You just have to be there

We’re moving away from an ownership society, to a rent-forever society.

A broken clock is correct more times a day than one who's off by one minute

If you die in a carcrash and the radio is still playing. That's basically your life's outro song.

If you bite you're bottom lip you look sexy but if you bite your top lip you look like an idiot

Lonely people forget how amazing it is to have the bed to yourself

Everyone asks you what your favorite color or food is, but no one asks you what your favorite temperature is.

Nothing ruins a Friday faster than realizing it's only Tuesday.

Millions of years ago, A wolf explained to his pup that if you eat a man you get fed for a day, roll over and play dead, and you will be fed for the rest of your life.