Shower Thoughts 🚿
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If you're wearing noise-cancelling headphones and someone has to wave at you to get your attention, you have gone from being voice-activated to being motion-activated.
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Freedom is going to bed without an alarm
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Someday, aggressively running your hand through someone's butt crack, then saying MasterCard, will make no sense because of chip and tap technology.
😱10πŸ‘Ž6πŸ”₯5πŸ‘3πŸŽ‰2😁1
For most people. You are one pay check away from being homeless
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Spiders are nature's 3d printers.
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They generally get a bad rap but sometimes in life β€˜material objects’ are all you have and can really help you through.
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Life expectancy in The Matrix is likely higher than IRL, as the machines have a vested interest in keeping you alive as long as possible to harvest energy.
😱13πŸ‘1πŸ€”1
If you had 200billion cookies and still wanted more, you'd be seen as greedy: but not greedy if it was dollars instead of cookies
πŸ‘Ž11😒10πŸ‘8😁6πŸ”₯2πŸ€”1
When someone dies on a heart monitor the beep stays on. Meaning the beep isn't the beat, the gap is.
πŸ‘20😱10πŸ€”2πŸ‘Ž1
The pilot who dropped the atomic bomb on Japan probably has the highest personal kill count in human history
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It is rare to see a black family adopting white children.
😁32πŸ‘19πŸ‘Ž11😱10πŸ€”1
So a single hair is singular. A few hairs is plural. But a lot of hair is singular again.
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Rap music almost never has cover songs of other rap songs
πŸ‘Ž16πŸ‘4πŸ€”1
You can't stand backward on stairs
πŸ‘29πŸ‘Ž14😁7😱7πŸ”₯1
There’s a huge possibility that you exist in some random person’s photo reel
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Eating fast is a trait common with people who grew up in abusive households
πŸ‘22πŸ‘Ž18πŸ€”1
Someone out there has the record of the longest continuous pee without knowing it
πŸ‘Ž18πŸ”₯7πŸ‘5😁3
Anal sex may have been a lot more common before the invention of quality condoms and other contraceptives.
πŸ‘36😒8πŸ”₯7😱7🀩6πŸ‘Ž1😁1
You don’t realize you’ve fallen asleep until you wake up again
πŸ‘32😱24πŸ‘Ž2😁1
Unicycles are all wheel drive.
πŸ‘22❀6😁5πŸ€”1
Short people will often ask a taller person to help get something from a high shelf but taller people always have to get their own low down stuff.
😁39πŸ‘21😒10πŸ‘Ž4🀩1