Being a toddler must be so strange. Going to sleep in a crib and waking up in Walmart

Stepmothers have no middle ground in media depictions; either they’re evil in fairy tales or horny in porns

Because of the fact you exist and your line survived there is a high chance you had a good worrior among your ancestors.

Take 10 years to build a relationship, 1 min to destroy it.

If humans become a multiplanetary civilization, there's gonna be a whole community of Gymbros regularly travelling to hi-gravity planets just for workouts.

A lot of people are afraid to be in a horror movie scenario, but most movie scenarios can be completely avoided by simply leaving the house or not being stupid trying to hide in the basement.

You're racing all the people born in the same year as you to see who lives the longest and the number of competitors is thinner every hour.

Some burglars are much better at moving stuff out of the house than professional moving companies. If burglars made their own moving company they’d likely make way more money.

The David and Goliath story is supposed to be inspiring but David essentially just brought a Gun to a knife fight.

When you smoke, you actually pay to get cancer.

Most relationship advice is given by people in relationships that just haven't failed yet.

We went from buying ringtones in 2002 to always having our phones on silent in 2022

Earth is a wet rock that's been sitting out so long, stuff has started to grow on it.

Jurassic Park, as a business, would have been wildly successful if they had just stuck to herbivores.

It seems odd that the generation using up all the Social Security money is the same generation that complains the most about people receiving unemployment checks.

The real moral of the Tortoise and the Hare story isn’t “slow and steady win the race”, but “Don’t F***ing sleep in the middle of a race”

The toughest thing to do as an adult is to keep your screaming on the inside.

The first humans sent on a voyage to another solar system might be greeted by humans who were sent later on a faster ship

By deleting their sub, Anti work actually fulfilled their mission to stop working.

If somebody has a kink where they get gratification from being shamed, social media is the perfect place for them.

People most often find successful relationships when they begin loving themselves and stop looking for a relationship