People make fun of bald people about something completely 100% outside of their control

Growing up on the internet is realising that the amish aren't crazy.

You fuck is a compliment. Fuck you is an insult.

some sexual positions have a height requirement

People who use sign language don't have targeted ads based off their conversations.

We used to eat cake right after someone blew all over it. Wild times

Most people follow laws not because they agree with them, but because they're incapable of dealing with the consequences.

If there was a monster underneath your bed that you had reason to fear, you’d be dead already.

Somewhere, there is an object placed by someone, that holds the world record for not ever being moved by anyone since it was placed.

No matter what color a bread tie is, it becomes perfectly camouflaged once it hits a countertop.

If Spider-Man lived in our reality, people would probably take his web remains from buildings and sell it on Ebay.

If unicorns were real, they would have been hunted to extinction.

Celebrities would probably be afraid of their biggest fan.

Every year we celebrate coming out of our moms vagina.

The letter B is P but pregnant.

Flintstones had no reason to have a Christmas Celebration.

Stairs are floors with extra steps.

Considering Mosquitos are the #1 killer of humans and humans have been engineering ways to devastate the mosquito population, the two species could be considered each others mortal enemy

Most of Marios enemies never actually attack him, they just pace around going about their day.

If you shuffle a new deck of cards long enough, at some point it will come back to the exact same order.

Watching people have sex is creepy but watching porn is normal