Shower Thoughts 🚿
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People that use glue traps instead of spring traps to catch mice are more sadistic
Kim Jong Un is a millennial.
Practice makes perfect, but we all still bite the inside of our mouth sometimes while eating.
Someone needs to make an exact science of how to reheat things in the microwave.
If you face any direction except the door in an elevator people will think you’re insane.
Onions force you to mourn their death
If you're a regular at a restaurant, there's a high chance that you have used the exact same set of utensils more than once at said place.
Every single item in our homes has been thought out, planned, designed. From a nail in the wall to the washing machine. Countless hours spent on every detail.
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You tell people you live in a tiny house, it's cute and neat. You tell people you live in a shed, you're a fuckin loser
Someone was the first human to masturbate in space.
Conspiracy theories aren’t really theories, they’re hypotheses.
If we are NPC’s in a game - criminals are the players.
Escalators and electric toothbrushes are some of the only things that are perfectly useable when completely broken.
the demise of the human species will ultimately be a good thing for the planet and its inhabitants
People mock garbage collectors and janitors without realizing that they're the reason for their environment being clean and sanitary
People with two prosthetic legs can pick their height
People treat a great day and a horrible day the same way. With alcohol.
Saying there is a secret ingredient in a dessert is interesting. Saying there is a secret ingredient in a drink is very concerning.
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Most adults get excited to ride gokarts even though they could drive a real car on real roads whenever they want.
It’s a better idea to teach students how to get trustworthy information from the internet rather than memorizing facts to pass an exam
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If you refuse to pay your taxes, you are put in a place where you live off of other people's taxes.