Your tongue is never comfortable in your mouth and your ballsack is never comfortable between your legs.

Everyone is walking around with varying amounts of poo and pee

Women who give birth to boys technically grew some balls

A corrupt cop is an undercover criminal

Spider-Man almost certainly has auto-rotate turned off on his phone.

Telling someone he has fat balls is an insult, telling someone he has big balls is often a compliment.

If you're 30, you've spent 10 years of your life sleeping.

Mankind will become extinct not from lack of food or water but lack of empathy.

Because dead animals eventually decompose into fertilizer, it is possible to have beef-fed grass.

The cloning facility in Star Wars is an infinite source of food for cannibals.

If Garbage trucks play music like ice cream trucks then you can hear them coming and you won’t forgot to roll your trash bin out.

If everyone in the world played in a single elimination Rock Paper Scissors tournament, the winner would only have to play 33 games

Nothing feels better than sleeping in, but nothing feels worse than waking up late

Farting on your period is such a dangerous game

Exercise to the point of pain is an encouraged form of self harm

A potato chip is a thing that can break apart and still be functionally the same thing as it was before.

If you had to go to the hospital, wouldn't it be better to take an Uber rather than an ambulance because of the ambulance bill.

The oldest person alive watched the entire planet's population be replaced

Jeff Bezos has done an excellent cosplay of Lex Luthor.

Talking to yourself is pretty normal. In fact, it can be therapeutic in some way or another

In medieval times, many people would’ve died due to Carbon Monoxide poisoning or suffocation from fire torches burning inside the castles, but their deaths would’ve been attributed to witchcraft and other conspiracies.