Characters thinking each new attempt to reopen Jurassic Park will be a success is a parallel to people thinking each new Jurassic Park film will actually be good.

Create a playlist with music from the Cranberries, Eminem and the Peanuts soundtrack you will have made your own trail mix.

You can have a fully gay threesome, but you can't have a fully straight threesome.

When you pretend that you're not high, you're an actor playing the role of yourself

The Star Wars movies probably exist in the Star Wars universes similar to how we have movies about WWI and WWII.

That one dream everyone had of going to school in their underwear was a prediction for online school.

No matter what country you're from, how you identify yourself or what you believe in, you've tried to move objects with your mind before.

Hearing something scratching above your ceiling is nowhere near as creepy as hearing something scratching below your floor.

Somewhere out there a teacher still uses the overhead projector with transparencies.

You never truly appreciate the walls until you're watching a movie with your parents and a sex scene comes on

In the grand scheme of all numbers, the difference between 1 and 1 million is both infinitely large and incredibly small

There are enough ants on earth to destroy the human race. Yet they don't. Be grateful.

Most people only want a lot of money so they can stop thinking about money altogether

Life is the process of replacing one set of problems with another until you die

If ghosts really exist and can kill you, the first few seconds after they do will be really awkward for all involved.

There’s someone sitting in your kindergarten chair and thinks it’s their chair

Evil chickens are probably a good source of deviled eggs

If you are feeling guilty about something you did in the past, it's not so much that you are worried that you did that, it's that you are worried you are still that person in your past.

Theory: The reason men’s pants pockets are larger is so we can discreetly rearrange our twig and berries. Being able to hold more stuff is an unintended benefit.

The real “conspiracies” that are impacting people’s lives are happening in plain sight. But folks drift to the outlandish conspiracy theories because solving the real conspiracies takes work, sacrifice, commitment and they don’t fit cleanly in a predefined narrative.

"It's OK to be not OK" is usually followed by the suggestion to get help, cause it's really not OK.