Those in power won't stop reminding you that you are free. If you were, no one would need to remind you of it.

There is likely many hours worth of security footage out there of yourself that you'll never see

Some magicians could actually be using real magic and just pretending that they are pretending

If he ever stops being weird, he can just become Norm-Al Yankovic.

We are more worried about the rise of artificial intelligence than the decrease of real intelligence

You are half your mother’s age when you reach the age she was at your birth

Schools have a problem when the students care more about grades then actually learning.

‘Stop’ and ‘end’ can usually be used interchangeably, but ending someone is a bit more extreme than stopping them.

If your profession has an appreciation week, you are severely underpaid for the work you do!

Bacon smells at least twice as good when it is someone else cooking it.

If Pinocchio were real, he would likely be stolen and used as an infinite source of free wood.

Being the last person to comment on something is actually a lot harder than being first.

People will swim in the ocean, even though there are definitely many corpses in it. People will not swim in a pool with a corpse in it. Humans all have a corpse:water ratio that is acceptable for them to swim in.

Orange feels more in between yellow and red than green feels in between yellow and blue

Just add fur to all the creatures that do not have it and take the fur away from those that do to create a literal nightmare.

When watching videos online the ads never have any trouble buffering

Father's day could be accurately renamed "Motherfuckers Day"

There is a 100% chance Guy Fieri referenced Flavortown when going down on a girl

There are probably people thinking they adopted a stray cat, while the actual owners are anxiously waiting for their pet's return

It's free to contact three satellites at the speed of light 13000 miles in the sky to know your position down to a few feet but it costs 7$ for a convenience fee to pay a parking ticket online.

James Bond is always doing amazing feats in tailored suits. It’s amazing to think of what he’d be able to accomplish is athletic wear designed for the specific extreme activity he was involved in.