Saying someone treats dogs like children is intended as an insult, saying someone treats children like dogs is a serious accusation. But both can be managed perfectly with food, toys, and teaching them to behave with positive reinforcement.
When you get zapped by electricity, you get shocked both physically and mentally.
People driving big or expensive cars get criticized for overcompensating, but those driving clunkers almost never get complimented for "undercompensating."
When growing up, Einstein probably used to hear "Ok, Einstein" quite often.
If humans see a Neanderthal minding its own business , they will get scared. Obviously that's why Mickey Mouse is scared of a mouse.
Non-native English speakers are more succesful at using "your" and "you're" correctly in a written sentences than the native English speakers
Your mouth and your anus are not separate holes. They are opposite ends of one hole that goes through your body.
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when computers eventually become sentient they're going to need therapy for all the things we googled on them.
Maybe trees are farming us. Providing us oxygen until we die and become compost for them.
Eating bread on a space station requires human knowledge from a span of more than ten thousand years, from agriculture to space exploration.
The lids on Tylenol bottles drastically underestimate how good kids are at opening things, and horribly overestimate how good a hungover adult is at opening things.
"Take a picture, it will last longer" was probably a much more snarky comment back when everyone didn't have a camera in their pockets.
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Any sufficiently advanced trolling is indistiguishable from real posts
The scary thing about dating is you are going to break up or get married
If people said half the stuff that hentai characters said during sex. A lot less people would have sex.