Shower Thoughts ๐Ÿšฟ
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That one guy from Superman was way too enthusiastic about seeing a bird.
One often overlooked but very important aspects of evolution is that our arms are exactly long enough for us to wipe our own ass.
You canโ€™t date someone half your age until youโ€™re 36
If you die when paragliding people wonโ€™t notice until you hit something or the ground, and theyโ€™ll think that was the cause of death.
For a split second, you were the youngest human on the planet.
The Simpsons have owned the same vehicles for 30 years and are still no closer to financial independence.
If the โ€œmany worldsโ€ hypothesis of infinite realities is correct, there are realities which differ from each other by something as a subtle as a single sub-atomic particle across all of Creation.
Lex Luthor got cancer from kryptonite. Therefore, kryptonite is his kryptonite.
It isn't until you die that your skeleton finally hatches.
You've probably walked by countless people on the last day they were alive
You might have made a decision that saved your life, without knowing it.
The biggest benefit to being a billionaire is that most punishments for most crimes turn into easily affordable fines.
WW2 movies always make it seem like all soldiers were middle age men, when in reality many of them were the age of high school seniors.
Both ends of a Dog are the smelly end.
The sickest comebacks are the ones you come up with way after the fight has ended
If someone died from an allergic reaction to a food before there was the knowledge of allergies, the society around that person would probably think the food was poisonous to everyone
The selling point for many meal kits is that the food is "restaurant quality." The selling point for many restaurants is that the food is "homemade."
Having a coat of arms is either awesome or horrifying.
One Reason People Want Grandchildren is to Enjoy Parenthood Again Without as Much Reponsibility
Spotify interrupts you to tell you the joys of not being interrupted
Fingerprint unlock on your phone feels safer then face unlock because you are providing an input (your finger) as opposed to it being taken from you.
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