Shaggy and Scooby Could Probably Deep throat really good.

To keep ourselves safe, we reinforce our doors with multiple locks, but put curtains and blinds on our easy to break windows.

Technically everything is portable, its just about how much effort you need.

Tomatoes are fruit, not vegetables, which makes most pizza types a fruit pie.

Depending on how active you are on the internet, you've probably met a murderer

Not a single one of your direct ancestors were virgins

4 legged animals must look at humans and think "how the hell do they not just fall over"

You are never worthless. You can serve as a bad exemple to the society.

Babies born feet first briefly wear their mothers as hats.

In Harry Potter and deathly hallows, when everyone turned into Harry Potter, they knew size of his penis. Maybe that’s why Hermione choosed Ron.

You don't know how many times locking your car has been useful.

No one in 2015 answered the right answer to the question, ‘where do you see yourself in 5 years?’.

Nodding or waving at people that stop for you while you cross the crosswalk is very strange because you're basically just acknowledging that they could have killed you but they didn't

Humans think that we are so advanced, but in reality, we are the only species that need to wear socks due to our feet getting cold.

If an FBI surveillance van named their internet source “FBI Surveillance Van,” no one would suspect a thing.

We are very lucky that most dead plants don’t stink like animals do otherwise autumn would suck

90% of problems in Harry Potter could’ve been resolved with a gun.

Coal is only an acceptable gift if it has been properly aged

If someone robs a bank, the punishment is life altering. When banks rob us, they just pay themselves more.

Porn addicted dudes probably saw more dicks then women.

We spend the first half our lives trying to look older, and the second half trying to look younger.