Just because 2 people are your cousins doesn't mean they are related to each other

The Sims doesn't have a disabilities pack because they don't want disabled sims to die in their game when someone inevitably takes away the wheelchair ramp during a fire.

You know when a creep gets caught with like 56,312 pics of child pornography? There is a guy at the FBI, whose job it is to go through tens of thousands of pictures of child porn to check what they are. He watches child porn all day, to save the children

When you fall as a kid, you worry about damage to the outside of your knee. When you fall as an adult, you worry about damage to the inside.

If you have smart lights that turn off with just your voice, your animals may be in constant fear that your next sentence will bring on the darkness

You were the size of an Action figure at one point.

Fascism is actually extremely popular, as long as it pushes your own personal value system.

Voldemort can sleep face down due to his unavailability of a nose.

Getting a new device comes with having to rebuild the library of alarm clocks you could choose from

Considering how much stress they are under, door hinges are shockingly reliable.

The Titanic moved over liquid water, was powered by water vapor and was sunk by frozen water.

A significant part of designing a cereal is making sure it won't sink in the milk.

Not separating your laundry for long enough eventually makes it unnecessary to separate your laundry.

Using a pro wrestling move "incorrectly" would actually do more damage in a fight.

A rock you touched could have also been touched by a caveman.

Microbial life is thought to be producing the phosphine gas that was recently discovered in Venus' atmosphere. On Earth, phosphine can be found as a toxic gas in swamps. So in a twist of irony, the first alien life may have been discovered by detecting swamp gas in the light reflected by Venus.

No matter what part of the world you're in, you're always surrounded by fish

Dreaming about showing up to class naked is probably very confusing for kids being homeschooled.

The Mandela Effect proves we would rather believe that we're capable of spontaneously crossing into alternate timelines rather than admit we were wrong about something.

The purge is becoming less and less science fiction every day.

We give dogs a lot of crap for eating random things but humans ate tide pods and drank bleach knowing what they were