Shower Thoughts ๐Ÿšฟ
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Worst part of being a kid was not having adults take you seriously when you knew what you were talking about
No matter who you are when a dog wants to lay with you thereโ€™s nothing you can do to not enjoy the unconditional love
Humans developed the capabilities to kill each other before they developed the capability to heal each other
If an asteroid is on course to hit Earth, half of the world wouldn't believe it despite concrete proof
The 15 minutes of extra sleep after you wake up feels like a lot more than the 8 hours of sleep that you just had.
โ€œWhat colour is watermelonโ€ and โ€œwhat colour is a watermelonโ€ have two completely different answers.
The first dab was probably a Nazi who had to sneeze during a salute
When you fall and scrape your knee, you just survived being hit by the planet.
When the Queen dies the conspiracy theories about her being alive will blow up like never before.
A sausage is roughly the same shape when it goes in your mouth hole and out your bum hole.
We are slowly getting to the point where it safe to assume that Elvis Presley is definitely dead.
It's not until you're in charge of paying all the bills that you truly understand your dad's obsession with the thermostat.
Memories ruin really good songs
In movies, Santa always delivers presents to one house in a neighborhood then flies off without going to the others.
The world has gone quiet for deaf people who read lips.
Rick Astley is going to be the most interesting celebrity death because majority of the links about it will be Rick Rolls.
According to movies, the most stressful part of being a veterinarian is having very dangerous criminals coming in and needing medical attention.
Your pets have probably seen you naked more than any girl has.
Frogs are anti-aircraft animals
as children, we used to think that being kids is suck and adults can do whatever they want, as adults, we realize that being humans sucks.
The real life Sheldon Cooper would the type of person to complain about Big Bang Theory online at every opportunity
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