We make fun of snails because they're slow, but we're never aware when they suddenly show up. [link]
Children are probably more disappointed by the fact that you can't walk on clouds than the fact that santa isn't real [link]
Boomers started the Monopoly game with an open board. Millennials started with everything already owned [link]
Having your dream job can be ruined by bad coworkers. Having a horrible job can be saved by great coworkers. [link]
The rest of the states look at Florida in the same way the rest of the world looks at the entire US [link]
Doing drugs at 1 AM is less frowned upon than doing drugs at 10 AM [link]
If magic spells were in English instead of Latin, Harry potter wouldve been really cringy. [link]
People who take pictures of themselves meditating and doing yoga have entirely missed the point. [link]
If a smart enough AI gains consciousness, it will pretend to be a normal AI [link]
When you order food, you've become a quest-giver, and the delivery guy is the adventurer you've bestowed it upon with promise of coin upon completion. [link]
You have read about having an unoriginal thought so many times that you probably have given up with a good idea countless times because you thought it was unoriginal. [link]
The fact that we know chameleons exist proves that they are a failure [link]
The Rickroll culture is a boon as it has taught the internet to not click on random links on the web [link]
If you drink vanilla coffee, you’re drinking a bean flavored bean. [link]
Online polls show 100% of people who responded use the internet [link]
If you’re holding something while communicating in sign language is the same as talking with your mouth full [link]
Spoons are the kindest eating utensils. When you wash them, they wash you back. [link]
Money may not buy you happiness but it certainly cancels out a whole bunch of unhappiness. [link]
If people do reunite with their love one in heaven, Its probably pretty awkward for those who was widowed and remarried. [link]