Dropping your phone on the ground with the screen side down is the modern Schrodinger's Cat.
Sneezing with a mask on feels like shitting your pants with your face.
Drug tests are the only tests where having less knowledge of the subject makes you more likely to pass.
If man a is seen naked in his living room by a woman, he’s a pervert. If a woman is seen naked in her living room by a man, he’s a pervert.
Dogs always expect us to share our food with them but look at us weird when we get close to their bowl
When Rogue One (2016) came out, it was the first Star Wars film not to have an opening crawl. The story itself was the opening crawl for the original Star Wars (1977) film.
Maybe dad jokes aren't caused by having kids. Maybe dad jokes are what attract women to future dads.
If you dropped an ant off a skyscraper, it would just have a nice view for a few minutes, then land and be on its merry way.
Drug cartels are paying better taxes than Amazon because they want their money laundry look clean
Let’s be honest: Harry Potter peaked as a child star. Once he started Hogwarts, he was a mediocre wizard who road the coattails of his friends’ superior magic skills, used up his trust fund to become a quidditch jock, then married his HS sweetheart, and then finally became a cop.
In most of the prank videos, the only ones getting pranked are the ones watching them.
It's really annoying that we live in such a technologically advanced age and we still can't unpress a button in a lift.
If given a choice, most people would marry their childhood crush as compared to any model.
George Lucas didn’t like that Han shot first, so he decided to go back and change that, but not delete a scene where siblings kiss.
As the population goes up, the probability of having an original idea goes down.
Everyone wants to be a superhero until they’re asked to put a mask on.
Taking a deep breath with your eyes closed feels better than with your eyes open