If you have the ability to read mind and have a friend with photographic memory, then you have a mobile library.
Having your reading glasses from the dollar store break and you’re not fazed because you can just go buy another pair (or two) is exactly how wealthy people must feel about everything they purchase.
We're attending funerals knowing damn well that they won't come to ours
Being a female werewolf must suck. They'd have to deal with "that time of the month," two times a month.
If essential oils were essential big pharma would have bought them all out and quadrupled the prices.
Showers are great because where else is it acceptable to piss on the floor whilst brushing your teeth
We are more likely to go onto page two on pornhub than page 2 of google
The only difference between being murdered and being assassinated is how important you are in the public eye
If a person is allergic to cats, they're probably allergic to lions too. Lion allergy. Sounds much cooler.
“Julius Ceaser has been dead for well over 40 years” is a correct statement even if it sounds wrong.
Dying really couldn't be that bad, so far no one has returned to complain.
Maybe the urinals were invented when a tall guy walked by a sink and thought "why not?".
If Batman really wanted to stop crime, he could invest that gadget-money into employment, infrastructure and social services to stop crime at its root cause.