Shower Thoughts 🚿
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It can take over 30 minutes to find the 'right' position to fall asleep, yet once you're sleeping positions don't matter anymore.
If you stand back to back with someone, you're facing them with the longest possible distance between you and them
Being a baby is so difficult. Imagine utilizing all the power to crawl at the end of room and some elder picking you up and leaving you again at your starting point.
Eye drops are technical blinker fluid
Collectively, it would've saved us so much time if all chargers were initially made so it didn't matter which side you used, like the USB C.
Leap day makes February rent feel like marginally less of a scam.
There is no way of telling if the perfect crime has been commited.
There are thousands of Rubik's cubes that have never been solved and never will be.
Growing up is getting bored with everything you used to enjoy, without anything really replacing it
A hot guy/girl that's into you is more attractive than a hotter guy/girl that isn't interested in you.
With Stark gone, Professor Hulk is both the smartest, and angriest, person in the room.
You’re the last person that’s gonna die in your lifetime.
If you have the ability to read mind and have a friend with photographic memory, then you have a mobile library.
Having your reading glasses from the dollar store break and you’re not fazed because you can just go buy another pair (or two) is exactly how wealthy people must feel about everything they purchase.
Saying "like" is the human version of buffering
We're attending funerals knowing damn well that they won't come to ours
Being a female werewolf must suck. They'd have to deal with "that time of the month," two times a month.
If essential oils were essential big pharma would have bought them all out and quadrupled the prices.
Farts are kind of food ghosts
Showers are great because where else is it acceptable to piss on the floor whilst brushing your teeth
The real online IQ test is seeing if you will pay to see the results.