Saying “you’re one in a million” is taken as a compliment about how unique someone is but saying “you’re one in 7.53 billion” points out how insignificant someone is in the grand scheme of things
Being 5 minutes early to an appointment doesn't feel that early but being 5 minutes late feels really late.
You can't dope to win the Olympics, but you can use autotune to win a Grammy.
Vanilla is universally associated with "plain" despite being its own unique flavor.
Bic creates two of the most stolen items, the lighter and the pen. A strategy that works in their favor.
Your future wife is probably telling her boyfriend that they will stay together forever
If humans naturally had horns, we'd probably have to shave them down to a socially acceptable length.
Maybe Hogwarts wouldn’t be in such disarray all the time if they hired more than 1 caretaker (who happens to be super shitty at his job)
Whenever prescription drugs mention to not operate heavy machinery after consumption, they are most likely implying something like a car but we always think they’re implying something like a forklift.
The Jedi could just crush the brains of their enemies with the Force instead of engaging into a slow and risky lightsaber battle.
Someone has probably solved a major world problem in their head at one point but passed it off as stupid because they’re just an average person
The 22nd of february 2022 (22/2/22) is on a tuesday, making it a twos-day.
Having a lot of old cars on your property is classy if you're rich, but trashy if you're poor.
Being delicious to humans is one of the biggest evolutionary advantages there are. Bad for the individual, but great for the survival of the species.
Sometimes you meet someone and you immediately know that you want to spend the rest of your days far far away from them.
Auntie Anne’s needs to partner with the movie theaters. Ditch those frozen, dry and sad reheated ones. Can you imagine the absurd sales increase?! Heavenly pretzels annnndddd a solid film? Oh I’m here for it. I’m here.