If you take a nude picture of yourself 1 minute before you turn 18, in a minute you will be an adult in possession of underage pornographic content.
Plants are farming us. They give us oxygen and then they consume us when we decompose.
If banks made 6 billion dollars from overdraft fees last year, then banks made 6 billion off of people who don't have money.
Somebody in the 1800s saw a glass bottle and thought, “You know what would go great in there? An entire fucking ship.”
If auto-correct were to prank people with incorrect spellings on April 1st, most people wouldn't even know the difference.
None of Aladdin happened! It was all a tale spun by that merchant to sell you his piece of shit lamp!
Every commercial that tells kids "grown-ups are too stupid to get why it's cool!" was written by an adult manipulating stupid children.
Going to the gym and seeing all those people lift the highest weights around like it's nothing while you're still new is kind of like being in an MMO town hub after you just finished the tutorial and seeing all the max level people flex their end-game gear
If aliens see footage of human speech, they might think that "um" is a word in the human language.
Peeling off stickers can be either the most satisfying feeling or the most frustrating task, depending on the sticker
Introverts are NPCs, we don't talk to you unless you talk to us first.
At the beginning of Naruto, the three main characters existed in a “love square.” Naruto loves Sakura, Sakura loves Sasuke, Sasuke loves nobody, and nobody loves Naruto.
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Ads in mobile games are all just the mini game "where is the x going to pop up"
If you think women are the weaker sex, try pulling the blankets back to your side.
Due to inflation, ‘Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?’ becomes cheaper to produce every year
If sharks were drawn to pee instead of blood, the number of attacks per year would skyrocket.
It’s strange that guys think a vagina is loose from being with 50 different men but wouldn’t get looser from fucking the same man 50 times.
The voice in your head has grown up with you and at one point was a child.