Learn to code, they said.
It will be fun, they said.
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Have a BUG free Weekend.
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My boss asked me how good I was at making spreadsheets. I told him I Excel at it.
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What kind of classes do spiders attend?
Webinars.
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Efficiency is a highly developed form of laziness.
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Some days I fix a bug in 10 minutes and waste 50 minutes feeling happy.
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Be a real man! Push to prod on Friday.
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What happened to the ML Engineer who went too long to the gym?
... overfitting.
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Floppy disks are like Jesus. They died to become the icon of savings.
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You don’t become wise by adding knowledge. You become wise by removing bullshit.
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To the next generation of kids:
Good luck finding usernames lol.
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[ 2B | !2B ] That is the expression.
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Your mind is software. Update it often.
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Last night the internet stopped working so i spent a few hours with my family, they seem like good people.
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A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
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Why did the computer need a rest after its road trip? He had a hard drive.
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I hacked my own computer. I knew the password.
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How do computers get drunk? They take screenshots.
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My bedtime story to scare the kids is by telling them about Netscape Navigator.

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Our new IT guy moved here from Australia...
He comes from a LAN down under.
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