"Getting close" - Anna Bright
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"All the energy of egocentrics goes into holding on to the illusions of their grandiosity, and falling from the throne, licking and patching up the wounds of disappointment in themselves and the world." (С)

Suppose you have some sort of life-changing desire, such as:

- Start monetizing your hobby
- Change your job
- Increase income
- Get into effective planning
- Develop a healthier diet
- Learn a foreign language
- Change your place of living

And there's no way you can do it. You don't have:

- energy
- time
- enough motivation
- money
- a sense of readiness, a belief in yourself.

In this case I do the following:

1. I allocate 1 main change in my life. And give the next 3-4 months the Name (Such 3-4 months I call super breakthrough). But I also give them such names, as "Getting book done" or "Popularity" or "Video-content" or "Healthy eyes" and so on.

2. Define what I want to achieve by it, the result in SMART (google SMART goals, if you don't know what that is). You can also do a little extra (1-2 more directions and + what else will pile up on top by itself).

3. I make a very clear plan (decomposition) for the main task.

4. I make sure (!) to allocate time for the MAIN change I want to make. If there is no time, I remove something else, optimize it, or temporarily move it away.

I aslo try to prioritize the main thing during the day. And the rest is leftover. Everything adapts there, all will have it's time. Or I either clear out all day long and THEN, the next day do the main things all day long, for instance.

5. I make monthly and weekly plans from the global plan for the 3 months.

6. In a good and active small group, in various online courses and clubs there and here I turn to the plan regularly, I report, measure, share ideas, help others, I am helped, think with the group, make decisions faster, think about any new ideas, talk about what I am afraid, ask support, see what others just go and do - and get inspiration

7. If after a short time (after the first 1-2 weeks) I see that the main thing is not in process - I think about what the difficulty is, why I do not comply, I think what else to optimize, to work out the conflicting systems, what to throw out, redo. Or I correct the plan.

It's simple.

I have a clear plan. I take it and do it, take it and do it. I check the map. And think about what's in the way. And I'm also stirring up the fire in myself.

Which of these points are you missing right now?
There are people who seem to be really, nice or try to show themselves so, but I will not communicate with them further.

Because they are too focused on themselves.

And this is felt so strongly, in particular, in various manifestations of inadequacy, that it's hard to be with them. I feel resistance at the thought of meeting or working with them again. And it comes from their inner personality settings.

And they will never understand what drives people away from them unless they study the theory on this subject. And yes, they feel at times or on a daily basis that "something is wrong here".

I always say that immature people are often not bad people. But they can be hard, boring, or unpleasant to others.

If they work on themselves, everything will change.

I've been working on my personality settings for years, cleaning up my inadequacy, heaviness and immaturity. And now I already clearly see every manifestation of it, and it is unpleasant for me. And it is unpleasant for people, too.
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Have you listened to " It's my life" for a long time? ))

It's good to relieve fears in the moment.

Life is so short )

- Do you still think that you'll live forever and you'll have 100500 attempts to do something?

- Really, do you think you'll still be as young and active in 10-20 years?

- Really, are you afraid of your classmates, of difficulties, of unsuccessful clients, of the opinions of strangers - so that you don't even try what you really want to do?

- Do you really think you'll still have the opportunity to live YOUR life? At 80 years old?

I'm 43, and about 3 years ago I faced the fact that after many months of hard work on the computer courses, my vision began to fail. It became cloudy in the distance, then cloudy closer, then my eyes began to get tired and painful.

It happened then for the first time in my life, despite the fact that I had worked hard at the computer for 20 years. My vision always was 100%, everything was fine, my eyes had never got tired.

Therefore, I was in a kind of shock.

I went to a good specialized clinic and they told me it was just my age. That everyone has something like this at around 35-45. Just here are your drops (Taurine and moisturizer), glasses and do exercises.

I was working on my eyes for a year first, everything became much better.

But still a year later one eye began to hurt. I went back to the clinic, they prescribed more serious drops.

Everything restored. But I decided to understand things even more thoroughly. I began to read, study, and test a lot of things.

And I have changed my situation very much.

Overall, my eyes are now always fine for the past six months.

But (!) only as long as I maintain pauses.

Once I think that I am more powerful than I really am and can work without pauses - my eyes overstretch, hurt, get very tired.

I've adapted and gotten used to the constant pauses.

Considering how much I do during pauses around the house and with my body, this is one of my best discovery, and what I call a self-replicating system. "Magic pauses".

I'm preparing for you now the list of the most helping activities, will post it tomorrow.

1. 2-3 long pauses a day (preferably 40-60 minutes, no less) without computer, gadgets and in daylight preferably.

We often drive a lot on purpose with my son before and after school. We do it specially for long pauses in the daylight for him and me. Plus I try to do extra pause during the day.

I try to do 2-3 such pauses a day now (although more often it is 2, but the eyes are much better when there are 3 long pauses).

During pauses I stare into the distance and blink a lot.

Being in daylight is really IMPORTANT. No matter how bright it is at home (and I have a lot of extra lights now, it's all not so good).

2. Short pauses - 5-10 minutes every 30-40 minutes.

Helps the program Workrave, which locks the screen of the computer, if you put in the settings "Do not show the "Postpone" button".

During pauses I try to do palming (it is easy to find on the Internet), every possible rotation of eyes (as in any gymnastics, by William Bates, etc.) - i.e. I draw the alphabet with eyes, bring them in all directions, circles in different directions, diagonally, etc.

At least 1-2 times a day I do exercises, I want to accustom myself to do each pause at least for 1 minute.

3. I started to blink more often - fast, long, hard - different kinds.

4. Sometimes I practice solarization - I look at the sun for 1-2 seconds (no longer) or I look longer with eyes closed at a sun, lamp or a candle.

5. I bathe my eyes - they like it very much.

I bought a new clean good bowl and put clean water in it with propolis non-alcoholic extract and honey, put my head down and keep eyes open for as long as I can. My doctor said it is good.

6. From time to time I put drops of Taurine (try to find with no preservatives) and moisturizing drops.

7. I regularly take supplements, balms. Like blueberry, eyebright, lutein, zeaxanthin, astaxanthin, collagen, taurine, various other things good and important for eyes. I'll write you sometime later, which ones I liked.

All these routines became full automatic. I have been working hard for 3 or 4 months until it was fixed.

In the beginning, yes, it was taking so much time to do it all. But it was definitely worth it. My eyes are the only ones I have. The results are good.

My TOP of what gives the strongest or fastest effect are pauses (both - long and short), baths and drops.

And I advise you to get your eyes better as early as possible. Today we strain them too much, burn them out.

And I teach my child to do pauses, palming, exercises, I organize him pauses in the daylight, I give him something else - like drops or suited supplements.

And I go to the ophthalmologist every year from the age of 35. To check if everything is all right with the retina, eyeballs, eye fundus pressure, and so on.

No, of course, there are many reasons to be sad. There really are. Many people have quite good reasons to be sad and upset.

But still, most people get upset every day because of the comparison!

The comparison HUNDREDS of times a day tears you apart.

- comparing ourselves to our ideal.
- comparing with our WANTED.
- comparing with other people.
- comparing with the way we used to be in the past.

STOP THAT. Stop this destructive comparison.

Unhook yourself from comparing it to how you would like it to be. Learn to accept things as if they are always good enough for you to be in a positive mood.

Think only of what to optimize, what to improve in it.

And also, get rid of those social networks that are tearing you apart, like Instagram )
"I don't need other people's "bugs" in my house, I have enough of my own"

I'm trying to figure out a new concept these days, how to quickly banish something negative, hate, that came to you from other people. I've encountered some new negative opinions in the last few days.

You don't have to take someone else's, THEIRS to yourself.

Especially since you have plenty to do with your life )

Get busy with yourself, with your own affairs, problems, and mistakes. Not someone else's mistakes or fixing their experiences, points of view, their desires in life and requests for you (even if the request is to assert themselves), their complexes and bugs.

Rescuer, save yourself!

Don't teach the teacher, don't save the rescuer (it's been a year since I came up with this concept and have been working on it).

Another option is this. To tell yourself:

"I haven't been interested in this (someone else's negative opinions) for a long time". And make yourself believe it )
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Just stop it!

Sometimes it just has to be like this )

Just stop yelling at your child.
Just stop staying up too late in the evening and go get ready for bed early.
Just stop forgetting to write clear plans for tomorrow.
Just stop doing that thing over and over again.
I don't like going to bed )

I guess the only thing I don't really like is going to bed and the process of falling asleep.

It's such a waste of time for me... Lying down for half an hour, trying to fall asleep... there are so many interesting things to do in that half an hour )) I have so many plans, thoughts, ideas, contacts, opportunities, so much stuff.

Maybe it's my Capricorn thing ) Maybe it's my potential pressing in on me.

But my son yesterday also says - I do not like to sleep.

Told him about the benefits of sleep, how it cleanses, restores, heals everything. Including our eyes. Of course, sleep is very important. I quite calmly allow myself to sleep as much as necessary, which is up to 9 hours of sleep often - as long as the body needs.

But I really want to find out how to fall asleep on the flick )) I think I need to work more physically in a day - add more sports, exercise, walking, breathing. I'll gradually add to it.

How is your relationship with sleep and falling asleep? )
Why do we need to pump up (work on) the areas of life?

If you've worked well on your Health
- you are always sure that you are generally fine. If you catch a virus or something else happens - you won't collapse, you will recover quickly, the body, immunity is strong enough.

It's when you have a lot of energy every day, no exhaustion and chronic fatigue.

It's when you wake up in the morning with pleasure, having slept well.

A well-pumped area of life "Job" is when:

1) your job is beloved
2) you are an in-demand professional in your field.

When you have all the necessary skills (not only the main ones, but also additional, and soft skills) to feel confident in the job you have now and at any time it is easy to find another part-time job or even a better one.

Well-worked on Finances is when you have enough reserves and income exceeds expenses.

When there are no debts, no credits, when there are some investments and conscious consumption.

When you know that even if a serious force majeure occurs, you have a high margin of safety, and there is development and growth.

A well-pumped Image (Appearance and Сommunication) - when you are always confident in everything. In your hair, your face, your figure, your clothes, your makeup, your communication. You're good at every moment, you always have something to wear, for every occasion. People always like you and you always like yourself.

It's always about confidence, serenity, and support.

You HAVE WHAT TO LEAN ON when you're well pumped in different areas of life, especially the basic ones - the first three above.
How do you build an eternal generator of happiness and energy?

1) You need "Your Goal" (or goals) - Your purpose, theme or several themes, which turn your life into a holiday, when you are engaged in them, and you would like to grow in them forever (or at least for some time).

2) And then you move through "Your Doors" - that is, Your ways, means, processes, which are also pleasant and interesting to do, that ignite, please you.
Working at the cafe again today, with music.

Need to speed up )

I once spent a year every day at a cafe at sea, pulling out some of my best online-courses and theories. Among other things I was inspired by how the musicians boldly express themselves, as they feel and want to. In general, I work to rock or alternative quite often.

Now I'm starting to go to cafes and work to music more often again - there's so much to do. In particular, this week I have to finish editing the book and things are moving very slowly at the moment.

In general, I don't work that much. I sleep about 9 hours, I have 3 blocks of rest that I spend on myself, plus time for my son, something else - that's at least another 5 hours. Workouts, meetings, other things to do.

Total for work is 6-9 hours.

And there are a lot of other things.

So in my case right now the only thing I'm betting on is The Power Time of the day.

I keep track of how much of it I have, how early it starts, how I amplify it, expand it, add pleasure to it, and what I use it for.

I have a lot of Power Time enhancers. Most often I use at least 5, sometimes more.

But proper music and "not at home" are probably the two strongest enhancers.

Sometimes the same thing can be said in a very different way (formulated differently), and it makes a big difference.

Your complaint, a dissatisfaction with something can be said in the form of:

- clarification
- polite question
- suggestion
- you can simply keep silent
- You can skip it and still find something good to say.

In most cases it makes sense to do this.

Especially if you care about the relationship with that person.

And not only will you feel better about yourself, the other person will also feel much better, so also others who are watching this will not internally dismiss you as someone they wouldn't want to deal with.

When I'm having a hard time, when I'm tired of something - for example, to work for a long time on something difficult that doesn't give me quick feedback, I turn internally to, let's say, fraternities )

To the fraternity (sorority) of writers.
The fraternity of any creative people - especially when I'm working to the music of some brave interesting musician.
To the brotherhood (sisterhood) of bloggers.
To the brotherhood of the strong and brave.
To the brotherhood of those who want to help our world become better and generally survive.
To the brotherhood of those who want more out of themselves and their lives.

And immediately all the puzzles are put together, and the hard things become easy and interesting, you want something much more. Higher, stronger, bolder, faster.

I want to do more. I want to be useful. I want to do things faster.

That's where I draw strength and remember my Moon.

"Shoot for the Moon. Even if you miss you'll land among the stars." (C)
😀 How are you this morning?
I have an amazing friend, a very warm and strong-minded person. We met here, in Vietnam.

Once in her youth, by coincidence, she was infected with HIV, then there was cancer and tuberculosis. There was a period when it all happened at the same time. Can you imagine what it was like? She went on solely on strength of character. Her young friend died of cancer, no one believed in her.

Many times she failed and pulled herself out again in the belief that she could cope. It was a long, very difficult cure story.

And now she has been in remission for many years for all of her illnesses. She lives a happy life and travels. It's a pity I can't show her picture, she is great.

Whenever I would tell her about my problems or whatever, she would always say the same thing: "Baby, you can do it!" ))

Ever since then, I've had this thing inside of me: "Baby girl, you can do it!"

And I immediately remember that compared to her situations, it was nothing. I'm definitely going to make it, what else?
No, not all people have to be "I can do it!" all the time and in everything.

In general, this is a rather strong manifestation of the HERO (the Warrior) archetype in some people. It's when there is the tendency to take pleasure in setting oneself serious, difficult tasks, overcoming oneself on the way to them.

We are all very different.

But there are universal situations that everyone faces, and these are skills that everyone should master.

For example, the reality is that life presents us with difficult and even daunting tasks on its own, without even waiting for us to set them for ourselves.

That's why it's very helpful to sync up with some mature HERO, who feels good about his life.

And it's great when when that person has the Sage, the Explorer (the Seeker) in addition to the Hero.

So that he would not just like to say "Hey, come on, you can do it!", but would would be able to explain everything, systematize, and give tasks - how exactly to do it, why, and if he can't?

Have you heard about 12 archetypes in people? )