Special Kherson Cat 🐈🇺🇦 (Twitter)

Trump threw himself a birthday parade under the clever disguise of “celebrating the Army’s 250th anniversary.” Classic move—when you want a giant party but don’t want to look too self-absorbed.

But somehow, he forgot the most crucial step in planning this kind of event: forcing people to actually show up. Rookie mistake!

See, real pros in this business know the secret—you don’t just invite people to these parades, you politely force them. You bus in schoolchildren, “strongly encourage” government employees, and remind budget workers that bonuses can be very... flexible.

Dictators have an entire playbook for this stuff. Honestly, Trump could’ve just asked Putin during one of their calls—he’d be more than happy to help a friend out and share some expert tips on how to fill a square. Trump really missed an opportunity to flex those attendance numbers.

Necro Mancer (Twitter)

Большой и дружный уроженец Будажаповича и Нацуковны, комвзвода #1472мсп, старлей-чмобик Юролтуев Юрий Владимирович из села Мурочи 15/02/25 жизнерадостно выполнил свою задачу и 29/05/25 собрал всех в кафе "Чайный путь"
vk.com/wall766155944_65 #всрф #потерьнет #груз200

IgorGirkin (Twitter)

Debris situation probably https://twitter.com/GirkinGirkin/status/1934136024164110563#m