Afraid of losing myself if I have sex


I’m almost 30 and still a virgin because I’ve never met anyone I trust. I’ve always felt asexual, but I worry that if I have sex and like it, I’ll become addicted to it. Even experimenting with masturbation scares me because of my religious upbringing, so I barely do it.

Dating is hard — people always want to know my sex history, and when I tell them I’m a virgin, they don’t believe me and pressure me. Most conversations just turn into talk about sex, and it makes me shut down. Can I get some dating tips please?

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Alfredo my father and I made
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I thought y’all would appreciate this bumper sticker
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How do ya’ll navigate relationships? 🤔 Have you found the one?

I’ve accepted that I’ll remain a single cat lady for the rest of my life cause the dating world would be so complicated. I’ve never dated anyone as a 23F because I know it would be a waste of time in a hyper sexual, STI plagued society. I also hate how love/ lust messes with my brain; can I stop thinking of you? I don’t even want to be with you! So for those who are actively trying to find the one, how has that been? I’d love to hear your stories of how you’ve navigated relationships and the comprises you’ve had to make.

A bit about me: I’ve identified as ace for a while because the most ideal relationship would be one where you’re just roommates that are attracted to each other but aren’t sexually intimate. Similar to the companionship of a pet. You’ll risk your life for it and it’s clear you’ll never have sex with it… unless you’ve got problems. But you’ll kiss it to death and want cuddles, buy all the toys to make it happy and give it a great life. it’s a shame the same principle can’t be applied to humans.

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Lazy WIP I made for last day(for me) of ace week
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Am I the only one who says this.

I'm grey asexual and I know most people say grey-ace or greysexual or something along those lines, but it always seemed like a mouthful when I was explaining it to people so I just found myself saying Grey-ce (pronounced like grace). Just felt like sharing that.

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A gentle question for asexual men who don’t want romantic or sexual relationships 🧑🧍

Hey everyone 💜

I’m an asexual woman and also a sociology student.
Lately I’ve been really curious about how asexual men experience life — especially those who genuinely don’t want romantic or sexual relationships at all.

I’m not here to debate or analyze anything, just to listen and understand.
I know how hard it can be to explain this part of yourself to others, so I really appreciate anyone who’s open to share.

— Do you feel peaceful or fulfilled living without a relationship?
— How do you feel when people talk about dating, marriage, or intimacy?
— Do you ever get tired of being misunderstood for not wanting those things?

You can share as much or as little as you like — I just want to hear real thoughts and experiences from you.

Please only answer if you identify as male and asexual.

Thank you for reading 🌸

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Asexual with high libido?

Hey everyone, any asexuals with high libidos? I feel like this is really contradictory but hear me out. Basically I have a pretty high libido and enjoy viewing nsfw content (vids, audio, writing ect) and while sometimes I will imagine myself in scenarios, it’s more of a third person POV thing. I also find women and men physically attractive. HOWEVER I have zero desire to actually have sexual experiences irl. I honestly have never met anyone irl that I have thought about/desired sexually, and I’ve only felt romantic attraction once in my life, and even then it wasn’t enough for me to desire that person sexually. Even kissing, hand holding and cuddling feels really uncomfortable for me. Sometimes it feels like a weird combination, enjoying the idea of sex but never wanting to actually go out and seek it. I’m not sure if asexual is the right label, so I would usually say I’m on the ace spectrum. Anyone else have a similar experience?

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Asexuals be like
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Am I Asexual?

If you are questioning whether or not you are asexual (including all microlabels), reply to this post with what made you start questioning, and why.

If you are too shy to post a reply, then you can scroll through the responses for the advice you may be searching for.

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Garlic bread or cake? How abouttt........

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It do be like that sometimes.

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dating as an insecure ftm asexual.

I’ve seen a couple questions similar to this but nothing quite like what I’m looking for so I figured I’d ask! So, I’m super sex-repulsed, and I know that regardless of the reason, a lack of sexual attraction is what asexuality is! However, I can’t really figure out if I’m asexual because that’s how I was born or if I’m asexual because of my insecurities with being trans as well as past trauma surrounding sexual happenings. I know that I am still asexual, but I wonder if I wouldn’t be if I was more comfortable in my body. My biggest question is: how do yall navigate relationships with such complicated feelings!? I’d be open to dating but it feels almost not worth it with all these complicated feelings, and unfair to a potential partner to be so unsure about my own boundaries and sexuality.

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Go f*k myself I guess

I am 28 (F), my boyfriend of 7 years is also 28.

We don't live together. Complications.

I rarely see him, when we do, it's hard because I'm dealing with depression.

I spent the last 3 days in my bed. Between those days, I've eaten at least 400 calories. I feel like shit.

Our date today, which was a walk to the park, should have been relaxing until he started talking about eating me out. Yes. He's been wanting to since the first time. I hated it the first time. I hate it now. But I digress. The issue is that I spent all my energy getting prepared for that park date and it was ruined just by that. He even played a song about a dude whose girlfriend wouldn't touch him naked (and only when she's drunk). That's so fucking unfair to me right now. I can't even FATHOM sex in my current state. I'm pissed off because the people in my life have been nothing a bunch of assholes that can't do anything right--all bark and no bite. Always breaking promises. Like my boyfriend is supposed to help me with my intern hours but I've only done maybe 8 in real life. (I don't have a car. I don't have a job. I only have that internship which is suppose to jumpstart my career and I can't even fucking do that.) I had to lie about the rest of the hours because we just haven't gone recently. I get it, he has shit too. But I feel so fucking dishonest. I don't feel like myself. I don't even like myself. I'm down because I have no control in my life right now. And after, what, 5 weeks of not seeing my boyfriend--he talks about eating me out.

Fuck off.

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Love this art.

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Homie just sent this
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