Making some prehistoric pride dinosaur again, currently still finishing them up and adding ones that have been requested for a while now (Aro-Ace especially) :D Can you guess what is what?
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From the asexuality community on Reddit: Making some prehistoric pride dinosaur again, currently still finishing them up and adding…
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My Parents Wish I Was Straight
My (he/him) parents don’t want me to tell people I’m ace, they want me to say “I’m not interested in girls right now!” When I objected, my dad said, “Why not? It’s true, isn’t it?”
The way they said it was so infuriating to me. They sounded so chipper and innocent, but I knew what was really going on. They wanted me to act as if I were or could be straight, just so they don’t have to acknowledge that their son isn’t into girls.
…
Truth be told, this was a couple of years ago, but I still get upset about it sometimes. I haven’t really had any good people I could talk to about it, though. Any kind words would be appreciated.
Y’all remember to love yourselves. 💜
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My (he/him) parents don’t want me to tell people I’m ace, they want me to say “I’m not interested in girls right now!” When I objected, my dad said, “Why not? It’s true, isn’t it?”
The way they said it was so infuriating to me. They sounded so chipper and innocent, but I knew what was really going on. They wanted me to act as if I were or could be straight, just so they don’t have to acknowledge that their son isn’t into girls.
…
Truth be told, this was a couple of years ago, but I still get upset about it sometimes. I haven’t really had any good people I could talk to about it, though. Any kind words would be appreciated.
Y’all remember to love yourselves. 💜
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Excitement towards myself
There are times when I get turned on, not by someone, but by myself. I even have fantasies about myself alone, whether it's about provocative expressions or clothing. Is it normal for me to get turned on by myself as an aroace?
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There are times when I get turned on, not by someone, but by myself. I even have fantasies about myself alone, whether it's about provocative expressions or clothing. Is it normal for me to get turned on by myself as an aroace?
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¿Soy asexual con indiferencia al sexo o solo demisexual?
¡Hola! vengo aquí con una inquietud bastante compleja de responder y que considero compleja de responder, les pongo en contexto:
desde que tengo 15 años me he identificado de manera clara como asexual, esto debido a que nunca tuve la intención de ver a los demás de manera sexual ni sentir este tipo de atracción por ellos (entendiendo que me atraen todo tipo de personas románticamente) y desde ese momento hasta ahora que estoy en mis 20 y tantos se ha mantenido así.
el tema es que hace poco conocí a una chica que me atrae bastante de manera romántica, y de la nada comencé a desarrollar otro tipo de sentimientos por ella asociado principalmente a que si me imagino manteniendo un vínculo sexual con ella, esto jamás me había pasado con otra persona. Estuve investigando por mi cuenta y resulta que hay personas asexuales que tienen sexo regularmente con propósitos de no atracción (principalmente para satisfacer a sus parejas y demás) pero no creo que esa vision encaje conmigo.
por otro lado, he descubierto la etiqueta de la demisexualidad como una manera de identificarme, sin embargo, me he identificado como asexual tanto tiempo que ya todo mi círculo cercano me ve de esa forma y tengo miedo de que esta chica me juzgue por mi manera de expresar mi sexualidad ¿qué debería hacer en este sentido? ¿elegir una nueva etiqueta o mantenerme con la que ya tengo?
pd: publico esto aquí ya que me interesa conocer otras perspectivas de vida y sobre todo del espectro de la asexualidad.
https://redd.it/1n69d60
@asexualityonreddit
¡Hola! vengo aquí con una inquietud bastante compleja de responder y que considero compleja de responder, les pongo en contexto:
desde que tengo 15 años me he identificado de manera clara como asexual, esto debido a que nunca tuve la intención de ver a los demás de manera sexual ni sentir este tipo de atracción por ellos (entendiendo que me atraen todo tipo de personas románticamente) y desde ese momento hasta ahora que estoy en mis 20 y tantos se ha mantenido así.
el tema es que hace poco conocí a una chica que me atrae bastante de manera romántica, y de la nada comencé a desarrollar otro tipo de sentimientos por ella asociado principalmente a que si me imagino manteniendo un vínculo sexual con ella, esto jamás me había pasado con otra persona. Estuve investigando por mi cuenta y resulta que hay personas asexuales que tienen sexo regularmente con propósitos de no atracción (principalmente para satisfacer a sus parejas y demás) pero no creo que esa vision encaje conmigo.
por otro lado, he descubierto la etiqueta de la demisexualidad como una manera de identificarme, sin embargo, me he identificado como asexual tanto tiempo que ya todo mi círculo cercano me ve de esa forma y tengo miedo de que esta chica me juzgue por mi manera de expresar mi sexualidad ¿qué debería hacer en este sentido? ¿elegir una nueva etiqueta o mantenerme con la que ya tengo?
pd: publico esto aquí ya que me interesa conocer otras perspectivas de vida y sobre todo del espectro de la asexualidad.
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Am I somewhere on the spectrum?
Been feeling confused for a long while and am hoping that even if the answer is no y'all's insights might point me in the right direction. 26M.
To preface- I feel sexual attraction quite frequently. I masturbate relatively regularly. I fantasize about people I know/ significant others. I watch porn and read erotica.
But the thing is... sex itself REALLY doesn't do it for me. Ever since my first time it's repeatedly been a huge let down, and I've tried with enough women that at this point I'm pretty confident sex just isn't for me. It's been enough of a letdown that I've never achieved climax during sex, which has, without fail, inflicted psychic damage on the women I've been with. It just leaves me and them feeling awful, and means I tend to get a lot of breakup texts after one attempt.
I've even been to a urologist about it, who tested my testosterone levels and then just kinda shrugged when it came back above normal. I've even tried to find a therapist who specializes in sex but none have ever returned my calls/emails.
Anyway, I know this doesn't align with most (if not all) asexuals. But if anyone has had a similar experience, or has heard of something that sounds like it fits, I'm all ears. I'm just tired of feeling confused.
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Been feeling confused for a long while and am hoping that even if the answer is no y'all's insights might point me in the right direction. 26M.
To preface- I feel sexual attraction quite frequently. I masturbate relatively regularly. I fantasize about people I know/ significant others. I watch porn and read erotica.
But the thing is... sex itself REALLY doesn't do it for me. Ever since my first time it's repeatedly been a huge let down, and I've tried with enough women that at this point I'm pretty confident sex just isn't for me. It's been enough of a letdown that I've never achieved climax during sex, which has, without fail, inflicted psychic damage on the women I've been with. It just leaves me and them feeling awful, and means I tend to get a lot of breakup texts after one attempt.
I've even been to a urologist about it, who tested my testosterone levels and then just kinda shrugged when it came back above normal. I've even tried to find a therapist who specializes in sex but none have ever returned my calls/emails.
Anyway, I know this doesn't align with most (if not all) asexuals. But if anyone has had a similar experience, or has heard of something that sounds like it fits, I'm all ears. I'm just tired of feeling confused.
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I had sex and now I’m confused.
I, 25m, am or was bi.
I’ve done the deed with a guy before (once like 10 years ago) but this was my first time with a girl.
I had… performance issues to say the least, like she was very, very pretty but the bells did not toll for me.
I tried it, didn’t like it, and now I’m sat questioning myself.
Like, what am I? I feel somewhat hollow, I feel sexual attraction but I don’t think I want to have sex again. Am I asexual? Am I demisexual?
help me pls
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I, 25m, am or was bi.
I’ve done the deed with a guy before (once like 10 years ago) but this was my first time with a girl.
I had… performance issues to say the least, like she was very, very pretty but the bells did not toll for me.
I tried it, didn’t like it, and now I’m sat questioning myself.
Like, what am I? I feel somewhat hollow, I feel sexual attraction but I don’t think I want to have sex again. Am I asexual? Am I demisexual?
help me pls
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Do you view Sex pragmatically?
Often when asked as an Ace (and Aro) person, I’m asked how I view sex as a concept. And frankly it’s a shrug. Nothing wigs me out much, except stomach acid for some weird reason.
Anyway, it often baffles me why so many people put sex acts on a pedestal. Yes they are a form of intimacy for partners, still it’s treated as sacred and somehow also abhorrent.
You want to talk about it, but also not. You want to explore it, but also not. Allo people in general seem to love the idea of sex but the act of speaking it out loud makes them spout things like purity culture and so many rules that differ from person to person. (As in the ‘correct’ way to do sex or talk about it or even think about it)
To me Sex is just something we as animals do. As all animals do. We all feel arousal, whether we want to or not, some of us just don’t have a need to act on said arousal and some of us do (badly). It’s puzzling to me why people find this so weird, or even find sex in media or in conversations repugnant.
Like yes I know time and place. Yet even when it’s okay to talk about it, people act like they should whisper.
Sorry if this incoherent rambling isn’t as straight forward. I guess I’m wondering if anyone else thinks this way. Or am I weird for shrugging my shoulder when a friend wants to talk about nsfw with me, because it literally is nothing?
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Often when asked as an Ace (and Aro) person, I’m asked how I view sex as a concept. And frankly it’s a shrug. Nothing wigs me out much, except stomach acid for some weird reason.
Anyway, it often baffles me why so many people put sex acts on a pedestal. Yes they are a form of intimacy for partners, still it’s treated as sacred and somehow also abhorrent.
You want to talk about it, but also not. You want to explore it, but also not. Allo people in general seem to love the idea of sex but the act of speaking it out loud makes them spout things like purity culture and so many rules that differ from person to person. (As in the ‘correct’ way to do sex or talk about it or even think about it)
To me Sex is just something we as animals do. As all animals do. We all feel arousal, whether we want to or not, some of us just don’t have a need to act on said arousal and some of us do (badly). It’s puzzling to me why people find this so weird, or even find sex in media or in conversations repugnant.
Like yes I know time and place. Yet even when it’s okay to talk about it, people act like they should whisper.
Sorry if this incoherent rambling isn’t as straight forward. I guess I’m wondering if anyone else thinks this way. Or am I weird for shrugging my shoulder when a friend wants to talk about nsfw with me, because it literally is nothing?
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Posting my place at its messiest (It’s usually VERY clean and organized so once I’m able to clean everything up I’ll make another post)
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From the roomdetective community on Reddit: Posting my place at its messiest (It’s usually VERY clean and organized so once I’m…
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Is this an asexual thing or am i crazy??
Whenever someone is interested in me it ABSOLUTELY FREAKS ME OUT. Like i get an unreasonably immense anxiety, stress, fear, you name it. The feeling is like being hunted (literally), all i want to do is run away, hide and never ever see this person ever again which is so stupid because this applies even for people that i generally like and are my friends. Seriously i feel like an antelope that's being prayed on and it's ridiculousss and unfortunately sometimes it has ruined friendships for me. Anyone relate?
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Whenever someone is interested in me it ABSOLUTELY FREAKS ME OUT. Like i get an unreasonably immense anxiety, stress, fear, you name it. The feeling is like being hunted (literally), all i want to do is run away, hide and never ever see this person ever again which is so stupid because this applies even for people that i generally like and are my friends. Seriously i feel like an antelope that's being prayed on and it's ridiculousss and unfortunately sometimes it has ruined friendships for me. Anyone relate?
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How do I explain how I feel attraction to my allosexual partner?
I've known that I am Asexual and alloromantic since 2022. I feel proud for finding a big part of my identity, even if at times I am still figuring it out myself.
My partner of over a year is allosexual and alloromantic. He has known that I am Asexual since before we started dating, and I know that a lot of people aren't very educated on asexuality like I have educated myself, but I feel like he doesn't quite understand in what way I am attracted to him nor do I know how to explain to him in a way that is understandable.
I find him pretty. I find many people aesthetically pleasing. And often I might describe them as hot or pretty to relate better to allosexual people. Do I find him attractive in the sexual way? No! That's in the sexuality silly! I'll crack sex jokes and try to flirt with them because I find it fun. I'm not sex repulsed, but I'm not entirely sex favorable either.
Anyway. He seems to get upset if I imply that I'm not sexually attracted to him. I don't mean it in a malicious way, and I only implied it once or twice, but that was sort of a given when he got into a relationship with me, no? Am I being oblivious to something? I know it might hurt a bit, but that's an entire part of my sexuality being that I feel little to no sexual attraction. Surely there's some kind of awareness after over a year??
How do I explain it? How do I educate?
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I've known that I am Asexual and alloromantic since 2022. I feel proud for finding a big part of my identity, even if at times I am still figuring it out myself.
My partner of over a year is allosexual and alloromantic. He has known that I am Asexual since before we started dating, and I know that a lot of people aren't very educated on asexuality like I have educated myself, but I feel like he doesn't quite understand in what way I am attracted to him nor do I know how to explain to him in a way that is understandable.
I find him pretty. I find many people aesthetically pleasing. And often I might describe them as hot or pretty to relate better to allosexual people. Do I find him attractive in the sexual way? No! That's in the sexuality silly! I'll crack sex jokes and try to flirt with them because I find it fun. I'm not sex repulsed, but I'm not entirely sex favorable either.
Anyway. He seems to get upset if I imply that I'm not sexually attracted to him. I don't mean it in a malicious way, and I only implied it once or twice, but that was sort of a given when he got into a relationship with me, no? Am I being oblivious to something? I know it might hurt a bit, but that's an entire part of my sexuality being that I feel little to no sexual attraction. Surely there's some kind of awareness after over a year??
How do I explain it? How do I educate?
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What is a romantic, sex-free relationship called?
Sorry if this is an extremely obvious question but: What is it called if a relationship is romantic or has romantic elements but is intentionally not a sexual relationship?
It feels weird to just call it a romantic relationship because I think most people will just assume that means it’s also a sexual relationship or used to be one or could be one in the future. QPR also seems wrong because the word platonic is literally in the name but I guess some QPRs can have romantic or romance-coded elements…
Also: Alloaces/ aro-spec aces, what do you call your romantic relationships?
Thx!
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Sorry if this is an extremely obvious question but: What is it called if a relationship is romantic or has romantic elements but is intentionally not a sexual relationship?
It feels weird to just call it a romantic relationship because I think most people will just assume that means it’s also a sexual relationship or used to be one or could be one in the future. QPR also seems wrong because the word platonic is literally in the name but I guess some QPRs can have romantic or romance-coded elements…
Also: Alloaces/ aro-spec aces, what do you call your romantic relationships?
Thx!
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