Making something for my QPR wife !
Technically she is my gf but we like husband and wife more to call one another. We have known one another for two years, going on three and have been dating for around six months. This year is our final year together of school and I am making a scrap book/journal for her to keep.
Best part is that she doesn't know about it and I will only give it to here after the school year ends. Also, it will have at least one entry for everyday when I see, text, or talk to her.
She is the kindest, sweetest, smartest, most beautiful person I have ever met. She doesn't force me into doing anything I don't want to, helps me when I need it, always there for an intellectual conversation, and keeps me going. There is nothing more I could ask for.
Her wits drew me in, and the more I got to know her, the more I realized my love was in front of me this whole time.
I would love to marry her someday, but since we are still in school, I don't want to rush it. Maybe after we finish college and after I get to know her family more and vice versa.
Just thinking about her makes me so happy and at ease. I had to share this with someone because I don't want any of my friends to know and my family wouldn't understand because they don't think I'm queer.
I will probably rant about her more here since I am ace and I want others to know that someone out there will love you no matter if you are ace or not.
Have a good day/night my fellowed asexuals!
https://redd.it/1msaheb
@asexualityonreddit
Technically she is my gf but we like husband and wife more to call one another. We have known one another for two years, going on three and have been dating for around six months. This year is our final year together of school and I am making a scrap book/journal for her to keep.
Best part is that she doesn't know about it and I will only give it to here after the school year ends. Also, it will have at least one entry for everyday when I see, text, or talk to her.
She is the kindest, sweetest, smartest, most beautiful person I have ever met. She doesn't force me into doing anything I don't want to, helps me when I need it, always there for an intellectual conversation, and keeps me going. There is nothing more I could ask for.
Her wits drew me in, and the more I got to know her, the more I realized my love was in front of me this whole time.
I would love to marry her someday, but since we are still in school, I don't want to rush it. Maybe after we finish college and after I get to know her family more and vice versa.
Just thinking about her makes me so happy and at ease. I had to share this with someone because I don't want any of my friends to know and my family wouldn't understand because they don't think I'm queer.
I will probably rant about her more here since I am ace and I want others to know that someone out there will love you no matter if you are ace or not.
Have a good day/night my fellowed asexuals!
https://redd.it/1msaheb
@asexualityonreddit
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Partner thinks I should contact doctor for medicine to make me "perform."
I (31 M) have recently started dating again. I'm new to finding out I am asexual. It has made me overjoyed to find out I'm not alone in my feelings.
I don't know the right words, but I don't feel sexual and have difficulty getting aroused at all. The person I'm seeing to now said I should ask my doctor for ED medicine so we can have sex. I wouldn't mind this i guess, but I kind of feel uncomfortable.
I don't have ED problems. I get random erections and get them routinely in my sleep. I don't have any health problems that would contribute to ED. I'm pretty healthy overall. This has caused my partner to assume I do not love her, no matter the reassurances or my ability to try to fulfill her desires in other ways than PIV.
I would like someone to weigh in. Should I talk to my doctor about getting medicine and is it even possible to get medicine to force an erection? I just want to make my partner happy and she is very adamant that I perform.
Sorry if I have made a mistake in asking here or any discrepancies on the post. I don't post online much and I am a little embarrassed to ask about such private matters to a community.
https://redd.it/1ms75kq
@asexualityonreddit
I (31 M) have recently started dating again. I'm new to finding out I am asexual. It has made me overjoyed to find out I'm not alone in my feelings.
I don't know the right words, but I don't feel sexual and have difficulty getting aroused at all. The person I'm seeing to now said I should ask my doctor for ED medicine so we can have sex. I wouldn't mind this i guess, but I kind of feel uncomfortable.
I don't have ED problems. I get random erections and get them routinely in my sleep. I don't have any health problems that would contribute to ED. I'm pretty healthy overall. This has caused my partner to assume I do not love her, no matter the reassurances or my ability to try to fulfill her desires in other ways than PIV.
I would like someone to weigh in. Should I talk to my doctor about getting medicine and is it even possible to get medicine to force an erection? I just want to make my partner happy and she is very adamant that I perform.
Sorry if I have made a mistake in asking here or any discrepancies on the post. I don't post online much and I am a little embarrassed to ask about such private matters to a community.
https://redd.it/1ms75kq
@asexualityonreddit
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What to do when you figure out you're not asexual?
I'm not sure if this is a good place for this, but it's a difficult topic and perhaps someone here has dealt with it or knows someone who dealt with something similar. I'm in my mid 30's.
I found out about and started identifying as asexual when I was in university, maybe 20 or 21? I really identified with everything I read about asexuality and have greatly benefited from the support and community. I've also been on the birth control pill since I was 15 for severe period cramps.
A couple years ago, for various reasons (primarily financial) I stopped taking the birth control pill. After some months when my periods came back and stabilized... I suddenly felt attracted to people. At first it was just a couple people so I thought "oh, maybe I'm actually graysexual or something" but then now it's like. Many people. I feel now I'm probably allosexual.
I want to emphasize that, even though in my case I believe I felt I was asexual because of some hormonal thing, I don't think this is true for the majority of asexuals AND I really appreciate and value the community and people I met when I identified as asexual. Regardless of the reason, not feeling sexual attraction in an allosexual world was very isolating, and support from the asexual community was so valuable.
I suppose that's something that makes it difficult to talk about with people. I don't want to be held up as a "See! Asexuality is fake! Look at this person!" Because I don't think that's true, my case is probably rare and uncommon and most people who identify with asexuality are just innately asexual.
But I'm also feeling some amount of grief or struggle in some ways. Yes, I guess I'm allosexual, which means I can "fit in" with social expectations about relationships now or whatever, but I was a part of the asexual community for over 10 years. It feels very difficult to have had something that gave me community and something in common and a point of connection with other asexuals I knew, but then now... I don't. Of course we still have shared history and I'm still friends with people but it's different. I don't regret at all the time I identified as asexual and feel it's just a part of my life and a part of my story, and gave me an understanding of the world from a different perspective.
But also, I'm different. Feeling attraction affects a lot of things about how I interact with the world and other people. I'm feeling a lot of feelings I haven't before, only now I'm in my 30's rather than a teenager. It's also kind of isolating and difficult, and it's hard to find others who have had a similar experience. I don't know, does anyone know someone who identified as asexual for some period of time and then stopped for some reason? Or felt their sexuality changed over time? Again, I apologize if this isn't a good place for this. The asexual community has been a place I could go for support for such a long time, most of my adult life. Now, I'm not sure where to go or who to talk to, other than of course IRL friends who are happy to listen to me but don't necessarily understand. Anyway, thank you for reading 🙏
Edit: My paragraphing didn't work before so I added them again
https://redd.it/1msfbcb
@asexualityonreddit
I'm not sure if this is a good place for this, but it's a difficult topic and perhaps someone here has dealt with it or knows someone who dealt with something similar. I'm in my mid 30's.
I found out about and started identifying as asexual when I was in university, maybe 20 or 21? I really identified with everything I read about asexuality and have greatly benefited from the support and community. I've also been on the birth control pill since I was 15 for severe period cramps.
A couple years ago, for various reasons (primarily financial) I stopped taking the birth control pill. After some months when my periods came back and stabilized... I suddenly felt attracted to people. At first it was just a couple people so I thought "oh, maybe I'm actually graysexual or something" but then now it's like. Many people. I feel now I'm probably allosexual.
I want to emphasize that, even though in my case I believe I felt I was asexual because of some hormonal thing, I don't think this is true for the majority of asexuals AND I really appreciate and value the community and people I met when I identified as asexual. Regardless of the reason, not feeling sexual attraction in an allosexual world was very isolating, and support from the asexual community was so valuable.
I suppose that's something that makes it difficult to talk about with people. I don't want to be held up as a "See! Asexuality is fake! Look at this person!" Because I don't think that's true, my case is probably rare and uncommon and most people who identify with asexuality are just innately asexual.
But I'm also feeling some amount of grief or struggle in some ways. Yes, I guess I'm allosexual, which means I can "fit in" with social expectations about relationships now or whatever, but I was a part of the asexual community for over 10 years. It feels very difficult to have had something that gave me community and something in common and a point of connection with other asexuals I knew, but then now... I don't. Of course we still have shared history and I'm still friends with people but it's different. I don't regret at all the time I identified as asexual and feel it's just a part of my life and a part of my story, and gave me an understanding of the world from a different perspective.
But also, I'm different. Feeling attraction affects a lot of things about how I interact with the world and other people. I'm feeling a lot of feelings I haven't before, only now I'm in my 30's rather than a teenager. It's also kind of isolating and difficult, and it's hard to find others who have had a similar experience. I don't know, does anyone know someone who identified as asexual for some period of time and then stopped for some reason? Or felt their sexuality changed over time? Again, I apologize if this isn't a good place for this. The asexual community has been a place I could go for support for such a long time, most of my adult life. Now, I'm not sure where to go or who to talk to, other than of course IRL friends who are happy to listen to me but don't necessarily understand. Anyway, thank you for reading 🙏
Edit: My paragraphing didn't work before so I added them again
https://redd.it/1msfbcb
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Autism and asexuality? Grey-ace?
I’ve confidently identified as aromantic for about a year now, but I’m starting to realise I’m probably ace as well. It’s taken me a long time to realise any of this though, because I do enjoy having romantic/sexual relationships.
One of the reasons that I’m so comfortable in my aromantic-ness is directly related to being autistic. I have a hard time with interoception (recognising my own feelings and emotions) and I’ve realised for a long time I was mislabeling a lot of feelings as romantic because that’s what I think I’m ‘supposed’ to be feeling in certain situations. Of course the same thing applies to sexual attraction, too.
I’m pretty certain I do genuinely experience some amount of sexual attraction, but I think a lot of what I’ve been calling sexual attraction for most of my life is actually sensual attraction, or a general desire for affection. Precisely because of those feelings, though, sex is still something I find desirable in relationships… but it’s not really something that I can’t do without.
I guess my question here is if I can even call myself ace when I do experience sexual attraction, to a degree. I know vaguely of ace people who do so, but all the ace friends I have irl (which is a decent few) are sex-repulsed, or otherwise entirely uninterested in sex, and comparing my experiences to theirs… it just feels stupid to use the same label for myself. Sex is something I think is very valuable in relationships, and it feels like I’m missing out on something to go without it. I’m hesitant to even talk to any of my friends about this, because I feel like I’m imposing myself into somewhere I don’t belong.
I like the term grey-ace a lot, but I can’t help but feel it wasn’t really made for me. I’ve always related a lot more to how ace people describe and explain attraction, but that might just be because I’m aromantic and the two are quite similar.
At the end of the day, my experiences are rooted in autism more than anything else- maybe it’s more accurate to just say I’m autisic, and so I’m a bit weird about these things? But it’s also true that I seem to have much less interest in and desire for sex than your average allosexual- is that enough to make me ace?
https://redd.it/1msan61
@asexualityonreddit
I’ve confidently identified as aromantic for about a year now, but I’m starting to realise I’m probably ace as well. It’s taken me a long time to realise any of this though, because I do enjoy having romantic/sexual relationships.
One of the reasons that I’m so comfortable in my aromantic-ness is directly related to being autistic. I have a hard time with interoception (recognising my own feelings and emotions) and I’ve realised for a long time I was mislabeling a lot of feelings as romantic because that’s what I think I’m ‘supposed’ to be feeling in certain situations. Of course the same thing applies to sexual attraction, too.
I’m pretty certain I do genuinely experience some amount of sexual attraction, but I think a lot of what I’ve been calling sexual attraction for most of my life is actually sensual attraction, or a general desire for affection. Precisely because of those feelings, though, sex is still something I find desirable in relationships… but it’s not really something that I can’t do without.
I guess my question here is if I can even call myself ace when I do experience sexual attraction, to a degree. I know vaguely of ace people who do so, but all the ace friends I have irl (which is a decent few) are sex-repulsed, or otherwise entirely uninterested in sex, and comparing my experiences to theirs… it just feels stupid to use the same label for myself. Sex is something I think is very valuable in relationships, and it feels like I’m missing out on something to go without it. I’m hesitant to even talk to any of my friends about this, because I feel like I’m imposing myself into somewhere I don’t belong.
I like the term grey-ace a lot, but I can’t help but feel it wasn’t really made for me. I’ve always related a lot more to how ace people describe and explain attraction, but that might just be because I’m aromantic and the two are quite similar.
At the end of the day, my experiences are rooted in autism more than anything else- maybe it’s more accurate to just say I’m autisic, and so I’m a bit weird about these things? But it’s also true that I seem to have much less interest in and desire for sex than your average allosexual- is that enough to make me ace?
https://redd.it/1msan61
@asexualityonreddit
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Does anybody starts masturbating late?
I'm 17 ace and never masturbated. I was wondering if there are some of you that started later in life like 17/18+ and why did you started. Cause sometimes i feel the urge but don't act on it (the most precise i can describe it). (sorry for my english it's my second language)
https://redd.it/1msnskd
@asexualityonreddit
I'm 17 ace and never masturbated. I was wondering if there are some of you that started later in life like 17/18+ and why did you started. Cause sometimes i feel the urge but don't act on it (the most precise i can describe it). (sorry for my english it's my second language)
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Loneliness
Does anyone else swing from being: I don't need a relationship I am happy as I am. To longing for a connection deeper than your regular friendship.
If so how do you deal with it?
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@asexualityonreddit
Does anyone else swing from being: I don't need a relationship I am happy as I am. To longing for a connection deeper than your regular friendship.
If so how do you deal with it?
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I'm scared becasuse of who i am
I'm scared that i will always be alone because of my asexuality (im men). I still want to have gf and do all of that romantic things, but i'm indifferent to sex, i dont feel a need to do it. I think i could still do it when she would want to, but i dont know how she would feel about it. Also all of my friends are anti LGBTQ+ community and if they find out i think i would be bullied.
https://redd.it/1msqqpi
@asexualityonreddit
I'm scared that i will always be alone because of my asexuality (im men). I still want to have gf and do all of that romantic things, but i'm indifferent to sex, i dont feel a need to do it. I think i could still do it when she would want to, but i dont know how she would feel about it. Also all of my friends are anti LGBTQ+ community and if they find out i think i would be bullied.
https://redd.it/1msqqpi
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Asexual men: Did people assume you were gay growing up?
It seems that the only valid sexualities for a man are either fully gay or fully straight.
https://redd.it/1mspx3y
@asexualityonreddit
It seems that the only valid sexualities for a man are either fully gay or fully straight.
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A group observation
For an asexual group there's a lot of sex talk in here.
I understand people are trying to see if they fit the boxes of asexual but it's ironic.
I'm not interested in sex or sex talk so I have never engaged in this group until now.
https://redd.it/1msurea
@asexualityonreddit
For an asexual group there's a lot of sex talk in here.
I understand people are trying to see if they fit the boxes of asexual but it's ironic.
I'm not interested in sex or sex talk so I have never engaged in this group until now.
https://redd.it/1msurea
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What does this mean?
I started talking to this guy and I do enjoy talking to him. But for some reason when I think about dating him I feel disgusted with myself 😅 Not about my body or personality, but just the idea of dating him. I mean I enjoy romance stuff and watching/reading the genre but idk. It just feels weird. I'm not nervous or anxious either
https://redd.it/1msybit
@asexualityonreddit
I started talking to this guy and I do enjoy talking to him. But for some reason when I think about dating him I feel disgusted with myself 😅 Not about my body or personality, but just the idea of dating him. I mean I enjoy romance stuff and watching/reading the genre but idk. It just feels weird. I'm not nervous or anxious either
https://redd.it/1msybit
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Putting 100 asexual flags in Denmark on Wplace (managed to put two flags today)
https://redd.it/1msv0mw
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I made a new Apathromantic flag (because I didn't have enough beads to do the orginal)
https://redd.it/1mt3896
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https://redd.it/1mt3896
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From the Aromanticism community on Reddit: I made a new Apathromantic flag (because I didn't have enough beads to do the orginal)
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