I have a partner and I just discovered that I am asexual
There is something that has been on my mind since I finally accepted my asexuality and it is "how is my partner going to take it?"
You see I have been with my partner for more than 3 years and from the beginning, he always wanted to be intimate with me, normally we had regular sex and I agreed because I thought that being my partner I should please him so that everything goes well in the relationship, (but honestly I have never felt a deep sexual connection when I did it to him). I liked seeing him happy and that our relationship was good so I kept doing it, but lately I've been thinking about what I really feel and I realized that I don't like sex as much as he wants to.
I was looking for meanings and I discovered that I was asexual, since I said I love him, I don't feel the need to have relationships to feel good with him (I have always liked to talk and play board games)
When I discovered it, I told my partner, which he didn't take very well and consequently asked me to choose between my sexuality or him.
I don't know exactly what to do in these situations because I really love him and I know he loves me (because of all the things we've been through together all this time), but the truth is that I can't choose to "leave" my sexuality because it's part of who I am.
I don't know if what I'm saying is nonsense, but this is something new for me and it's hard to think about leaving someone you love for something you just realized.
I've been thinking about my future and it's not a priority for me to have sex, but I really want it and if I let it I wouldn't find someone as compatible with me.
He himself has told me that he feels disappointed and that now it's my turn to decide.
Has something similar happened to anyone? Give me your advice, please 😓
https://redd.it/1l2x193
@asexualityonreddit
There is something that has been on my mind since I finally accepted my asexuality and it is "how is my partner going to take it?"
You see I have been with my partner for more than 3 years and from the beginning, he always wanted to be intimate with me, normally we had regular sex and I agreed because I thought that being my partner I should please him so that everything goes well in the relationship, (but honestly I have never felt a deep sexual connection when I did it to him). I liked seeing him happy and that our relationship was good so I kept doing it, but lately I've been thinking about what I really feel and I realized that I don't like sex as much as he wants to.
I was looking for meanings and I discovered that I was asexual, since I said I love him, I don't feel the need to have relationships to feel good with him (I have always liked to talk and play board games)
When I discovered it, I told my partner, which he didn't take very well and consequently asked me to choose between my sexuality or him.
I don't know exactly what to do in these situations because I really love him and I know he loves me (because of all the things we've been through together all this time), but the truth is that I can't choose to "leave" my sexuality because it's part of who I am.
I don't know if what I'm saying is nonsense, but this is something new for me and it's hard to think about leaving someone you love for something you just realized.
I've been thinking about my future and it's not a priority for me to have sex, but I really want it and if I let it I wouldn't find someone as compatible with me.
He himself has told me that he feels disappointed and that now it's my turn to decide.
Has something similar happened to anyone? Give me your advice, please 😓
https://redd.it/1l2x193
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit
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am i asexual?
im pretty confused on what asexuality is.
personally, i definitely feel romantic attraction and all. I also find people physically attractive (but usually only celebrities who are REALLY attractive). i know im Bi because i feel both of those things for men and women. HOWEVER, when i see an attractive person i feel it in my soul and im not like sexually aroused by it at all (for a long time i didnt know anyone could be sexually aroused by someones appearance).
i dont know how to explain it but if i see a hot person i cant look away and it makes me smile, and i have this really weird feeling, and the more of their personality i see the more attracted to them i am. but i dont want to have sex with anyone i find attractive. I feel like if there was a real person in front of me that was really hot id want to kiss them but nothing else at all. AT. ALL. i have 0 desire to have sex ever again.
ive done it before and i found it boring and kind of gross every time.
so is this asexuality? or is it just sex repulsed
https://redd.it/1l2zz0m
@asexualityonreddit
im pretty confused on what asexuality is.
personally, i definitely feel romantic attraction and all. I also find people physically attractive (but usually only celebrities who are REALLY attractive). i know im Bi because i feel both of those things for men and women. HOWEVER, when i see an attractive person i feel it in my soul and im not like sexually aroused by it at all (for a long time i didnt know anyone could be sexually aroused by someones appearance).
i dont know how to explain it but if i see a hot person i cant look away and it makes me smile, and i have this really weird feeling, and the more of their personality i see the more attracted to them i am. but i dont want to have sex with anyone i find attractive. I feel like if there was a real person in front of me that was really hot id want to kiss them but nothing else at all. AT. ALL. i have 0 desire to have sex ever again.
ive done it before and i found it boring and kind of gross every time.
so is this asexuality? or is it just sex repulsed
https://redd.it/1l2zz0m
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit
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My latest asexual pin creation is ready! 🥰 asexual garlic bread of course..
https://redd.it/1l347un
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/1l347un
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit: My latest asexual pin creation is ready! 🥰 asexual garlic bread of course..
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Is there a label for this?
I think I've always been on the aromantic spectrum, but might have been able to feel at least some romantic attraction in the past, though I'm not entirely sure about that either. Anyway, if what I felt has been romantic attraction then the last time I've experienced it was almost three years ago. Around that time I got out of a toxic/emotionally abusive relationship and not much later someone tried pressuring me into a romantic relationship with them, reacting with abuse when I rejected them. That had happened to me before even before my relationship, but as it had now happened three times that people who have been romantically attracted to me have manipulated and abused me I've developed a strong aversion to romance and think it might have taken a way the little bit of romantic attraction I had left in me.
The closest label I've found is caedoromantic, but that one is defined as having been alloromantic in the past and becoming aromantic due to trauma, but I don't think I've ever been alloro since even before all that happened to me I'd only occasionally develop small crushes on people I was either already friends with or were unavailable (so I might have been a mix of demi- and lithoromantic in the past).
https://redd.it/1l36mu7
@asexualityonreddit
I think I've always been on the aromantic spectrum, but might have been able to feel at least some romantic attraction in the past, though I'm not entirely sure about that either. Anyway, if what I felt has been romantic attraction then the last time I've experienced it was almost three years ago. Around that time I got out of a toxic/emotionally abusive relationship and not much later someone tried pressuring me into a romantic relationship with them, reacting with abuse when I rejected them. That had happened to me before even before my relationship, but as it had now happened three times that people who have been romantically attracted to me have manipulated and abused me I've developed a strong aversion to romance and think it might have taken a way the little bit of romantic attraction I had left in me.
The closest label I've found is caedoromantic, but that one is defined as having been alloromantic in the past and becoming aromantic due to trauma, but I don't think I've ever been alloro since even before all that happened to me I'd only occasionally develop small crushes on people I was either already friends with or were unavailable (so I might have been a mix of demi- and lithoromantic in the past).
https://redd.it/1l36mu7
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Aromanticism community on Reddit
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Are You Aro (Advice)?
**Hi everyone!**
Welcome to our weekly Advice post about Aromanticism! Aromantic people experience little to no romantic attraction.
**Do any of these resonate with you?**
\* You rarely (if ever) experience crushes on others.
\* You find the idea of a romantic relationship unappealing, and prefer strong platonic bonds.
\* You've been in romantic relationships but felt like you were going through the motions.
\* You've researched what crushes are "supposed" to feel like, but can't relate.
These are just a few signs you might be Aromantic. Aromanticism is a spectrum, and every person's experience is unique.
\*\*Have questions about aromanticism or your own identity?\*\* Ask away in the comments below, and we'll and your fellow Aro’s will do the best to help!
* [**More signs that you are Aro**](https://aromanticguide.com/am-i-aro)
* [**Honeymoon Phase**](https://health.clevelandclinic.org/what-is-the-honeymoon-phase)
* [**Types of attraction (might be incomplete)**](https://types-of-attraction.carrd.co/)
https://redd.it/1l3gynv
@asexualityonreddit
**Hi everyone!**
Welcome to our weekly Advice post about Aromanticism! Aromantic people experience little to no romantic attraction.
**Do any of these resonate with you?**
\* You rarely (if ever) experience crushes on others.
\* You find the idea of a romantic relationship unappealing, and prefer strong platonic bonds.
\* You've been in romantic relationships but felt like you were going through the motions.
\* You've researched what crushes are "supposed" to feel like, but can't relate.
These are just a few signs you might be Aromantic. Aromanticism is a spectrum, and every person's experience is unique.
\*\*Have questions about aromanticism or your own identity?\*\* Ask away in the comments below, and we'll and your fellow Aro’s will do the best to help!
* [**More signs that you are Aro**](https://aromanticguide.com/am-i-aro)
* [**Honeymoon Phase**](https://health.clevelandclinic.org/what-is-the-honeymoon-phase)
* [**Types of attraction (might be incomplete)**](https://types-of-attraction.carrd.co/)
https://redd.it/1l3gynv
@asexualityonreddit