Sexualition of male spaces
I've been noticing, and I'm sure many of you have, that male spaces, especially online ones, are overly sexualized. Reddit as a whole is mostly male, and subs like TIFU and AskReddit are good examples of places where sexualized content gets a disproportionate amount of attention. However, it's especially true for dedicated male spaces, like AskMen.
As a demisexual man I find it really frustrating and tiring. Seeing so much sexualized content, seeing men constantly talking about the way they want women to look, how much they like sex, and so on.
I can admit that sex is an important part of life for most people, and I'm not sex-repulsed. I can imagine this is even tougher for those of you who are. But even so, much of this conversation does repulse me, because it's all so hollow - very few are talking about anything with much nuance, like their experiences in a matter-of-fact light, ways to engage healthily, or being respectful. Much of it seems to really reduce sex to a feeling, and reduce the women to agents subjected to sex rather than active participants in it.
This frustrates me on a few levels - I'm frustrated for the women who are reduced to this, for the perpetuation of this culture that shows no signs of slowing down. I'm frustrated about feeling excluded, unwelcome, and like an outsider even though it's not a practice I want to be part of. I'm frustrated for the men who get dragged into it, never seeing how the reductivism harms their views of sex and especially of women.
Anyways, I'm just posting this because I really felt alone about it, and didn't know where else I could talk about it. I wish there was a way to filter NSFW posts from specific subreddits out of my feed, maybe I'll have to unsubscribe from them entirely.
https://redd.it/qb22z0
@asexualityonreddit
I've been noticing, and I'm sure many of you have, that male spaces, especially online ones, are overly sexualized. Reddit as a whole is mostly male, and subs like TIFU and AskReddit are good examples of places where sexualized content gets a disproportionate amount of attention. However, it's especially true for dedicated male spaces, like AskMen.
As a demisexual man I find it really frustrating and tiring. Seeing so much sexualized content, seeing men constantly talking about the way they want women to look, how much they like sex, and so on.
I can admit that sex is an important part of life for most people, and I'm not sex-repulsed. I can imagine this is even tougher for those of you who are. But even so, much of this conversation does repulse me, because it's all so hollow - very few are talking about anything with much nuance, like their experiences in a matter-of-fact light, ways to engage healthily, or being respectful. Much of it seems to really reduce sex to a feeling, and reduce the women to agents subjected to sex rather than active participants in it.
This frustrates me on a few levels - I'm frustrated for the women who are reduced to this, for the perpetuation of this culture that shows no signs of slowing down. I'm frustrated about feeling excluded, unwelcome, and like an outsider even though it's not a practice I want to be part of. I'm frustrated for the men who get dragged into it, never seeing how the reductivism harms their views of sex and especially of women.
Anyways, I'm just posting this because I really felt alone about it, and didn't know where else I could talk about it. I wish there was a way to filter NSFW posts from specific subreddits out of my feed, maybe I'll have to unsubscribe from them entirely.
https://redd.it/qb22z0
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
Sexualition of male spaces
I've been noticing, and I'm sure many of you have, that male spaces, especially online ones, are overly sexualized. Reddit as a whole is mostly...
Got my ace pin today! Just in time for Halloween-going to sneak up on all my friends! 😁
https://redd.it/qauewn
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/qauewn
@asexualityonreddit
Is anyone else’s mental health affected by allosexual people?
It’s entirely illogical and I completely respect that allosexuals have their own needs, but I get depressed as hell whenever I hear about somebody having sex on a regular basis. I also get a icky feeling when sex is glorified in a certain way. Im usually sex-indifferent, but there are moments where sex-repulsion starts to creep in. Idk if it’s insecurity or what, and I’m not sure what’s going on psychologically when these feelings happen, but it feels awful. Does anyone else have this experience?
https://redd.it/qb3bfk
@asexualityonreddit
It’s entirely illogical and I completely respect that allosexuals have their own needs, but I get depressed as hell whenever I hear about somebody having sex on a regular basis. I also get a icky feeling when sex is glorified in a certain way. Im usually sex-indifferent, but there are moments where sex-repulsion starts to creep in. Idk if it’s insecurity or what, and I’m not sure what’s going on psychologically when these feelings happen, but it feels awful. Does anyone else have this experience?
https://redd.it/qb3bfk
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
Is anyone else’s mental health affected by allosexual people?
It’s entirely illogical and I completely respect that allosexuals have their own needs, but I get depressed as hell whenever I hear about somebody...
Do any asexual’s enjoy massages?
I’m completely sex and romantically repulsed. However I’m very sensual and I love massages. Does anyone else feel the same way ?
https://redd.it/qb9rqd
@asexualityonreddit
I’m completely sex and romantically repulsed. However I’m very sensual and I love massages. Does anyone else feel the same way ?
https://redd.it/qb9rqd
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
Do any asexual’s enjoy massages?
I’m completely sex and romantically repulsed. However I’m very sensual and I love massages. Does anyone else feel the same way ?
35 is a terrible time to realize I’m Ace.
I’ve always been adverse to touch, but the past 4 years it’s gotten progressively worse.
I don’t crave intimacy AT ALL. I don’t miss it a bit.
I love my bubble! My skin absolutely prickles if I’m touched.
The problem is - I’m married.
I spent so much of my life trying to follow norms, so I met a guy and made a family … but now that I’m comfortable enough to not mask, he’s touch starved and I’m starting to see him as needy.
Today he literally lunged at me trying to get a kiss and I reeled back.
It wasn’t a great moment and it left us both exposed.
I’m sure everyone can see where this is going. I’m terrified and sad, but I’m not willing and he’s trying to wear me down.
He’s a fantastic human and I want to stress it really is ME and not him. I might come off cold here but I truly am a good partner - I just can’t fathom doing this dance anymore.
He deserves way better, and I guess I deserve my bubble :/
(I want to stress that I think we have a great partnership, and but for the physical aspect we have a pretty perfect marriage - but like most folks that part is important to him. He deserves the relationship he wants to have, not what I’m comfortable with. I’m just sad to be this way and that it’s affecting my life so much.)
https://redd.it/qbbrsw
@asexualityonreddit
I’ve always been adverse to touch, but the past 4 years it’s gotten progressively worse.
I don’t crave intimacy AT ALL. I don’t miss it a bit.
I love my bubble! My skin absolutely prickles if I’m touched.
The problem is - I’m married.
I spent so much of my life trying to follow norms, so I met a guy and made a family … but now that I’m comfortable enough to not mask, he’s touch starved and I’m starting to see him as needy.
Today he literally lunged at me trying to get a kiss and I reeled back.
It wasn’t a great moment and it left us both exposed.
I’m sure everyone can see where this is going. I’m terrified and sad, but I’m not willing and he’s trying to wear me down.
He’s a fantastic human and I want to stress it really is ME and not him. I might come off cold here but I truly am a good partner - I just can’t fathom doing this dance anymore.
He deserves way better, and I guess I deserve my bubble :/
(I want to stress that I think we have a great partnership, and but for the physical aspect we have a pretty perfect marriage - but like most folks that part is important to him. He deserves the relationship he wants to have, not what I’m comfortable with. I’m just sad to be this way and that it’s affecting my life so much.)
https://redd.it/qbbrsw
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
35 is a terrible time to realize I’m Ace.
I’ve always been adverse to touch, but the past 4 years it’s gotten progressively worse. I don’t crave intimacy AT ALL. I don’t miss it a bit....
Found these rings at Walmart. 💜🤍🖤💚 They came in a 5 silicone ring pack and immediately grabbed some. I've always wanted some rings.
https://redd.it/qbeoq2
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/qbeoq2
@asexualityonreddit
This place feels like home
I’ve been aromantic and asexual for 6 years since I was 15, however living in a hyper sexual world I sometimes feel like an alien as offensive as that sounds . Sometimes I wish I wasn’t AroAce however whenever I feel alone I just come here and everything feels better. This subreddit is my favourite place in the world and it’s thanks to each and everyone of you. If anyone needs a friend please feel free to message me .
I hope everyone reading this is having an amazing day please remember the world is a better place for you being in it 😀
https://redd.it/qbc3h7
@asexualityonreddit
I’ve been aromantic and asexual for 6 years since I was 15, however living in a hyper sexual world I sometimes feel like an alien as offensive as that sounds . Sometimes I wish I wasn’t AroAce however whenever I feel alone I just come here and everything feels better. This subreddit is my favourite place in the world and it’s thanks to each and everyone of you. If anyone needs a friend please feel free to message me .
I hope everyone reading this is having an amazing day please remember the world is a better place for you being in it 😀
https://redd.it/qbc3h7
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
This place feels like home
I’ve been aromantic and asexual for 6 years since I was 15, however living in a hyper sexual world I sometimes feel like an alien as offensive as...
I don't want people touching my junk, that doesn't mean I can't like "sexy" things
I swear, I'm getting so frustrated at my friend. She's been poking at the fact that I come across sexual even though I'm not, which she finds funny/strange because she's the actual wild one.
Like I am really aroace. But I like dressing hot. I've worked at a strip club and liked it. I have an ass tattoo and like twerking. I like feeling beautiful and being seen as it. IT DOESNT MEAN I WANT PEOPLE TOUCHING MY JUNK!!!
but if I bring up anything in the realm of sexuality she starts up with the "mmmm...are we sure?" And I'm just like ffs, I'm ace not a child. It's just so frustrating, she's supportive but makes me feel invalidated the moment I express myself.
https://redd.it/qbieee
@asexualityonreddit
I swear, I'm getting so frustrated at my friend. She's been poking at the fact that I come across sexual even though I'm not, which she finds funny/strange because she's the actual wild one.
Like I am really aroace. But I like dressing hot. I've worked at a strip club and liked it. I have an ass tattoo and like twerking. I like feeling beautiful and being seen as it. IT DOESNT MEAN I WANT PEOPLE TOUCHING MY JUNK!!!
but if I bring up anything in the realm of sexuality she starts up with the "mmmm...are we sure?" And I'm just like ffs, I'm ace not a child. It's just so frustrating, she's supportive but makes me feel invalidated the moment I express myself.
https://redd.it/qbieee
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
I don't want people touching my junk, that doesn't mean I can't...
I swear, I'm getting so frustrated at my friend. She's been poking at the fact that I come across sexual even though I'm not, which she finds...
I just saw someone in my class with a black ring but i'm scared to ask
https://redd.it/qbm4ua
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/qbm4ua
@asexualityonreddit
Bad experience with my own therapist
i have already told her i'm asexual. and for some reason she treats it like its a phase.
i explain over and over again i am this way, no it isn't going to change and no i don't have any sex trauma, I JUST AM ASEXUAL! it makes me so frustrated.
anyone else deals with that kind of things?
https://redd.it/qboj9e
@asexualityonreddit
i have already told her i'm asexual. and for some reason she treats it like its a phase.
i explain over and over again i am this way, no it isn't going to change and no i don't have any sex trauma, I JUST AM ASEXUAL! it makes me so frustrated.
anyone else deals with that kind of things?
https://redd.it/qboj9e
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
Bad experience with my own therapist
i have already told her i'm asexual. and for some reason she treats it like its a phase. i explain over and over again i am this way, no it isn't...