My school's lgbt club starts tomorrow and I'm hesitant to go

I'm aroace, my school has a club for lgbt people run by my painting teacher. I have no idea how it works , and what we'd do there. I want to go so bad, but I'm a bit worried. Do I really want to be out to so many people? I don't know. Maybe I'll go and see how it is, If it's not my thing that's ok.

https://redd.it/pevy9r
@asexualityonreddit

apparently my asexuality is a "total buzzkill"

I need to rant. not sure if I'm overreacting, but I'm still a little upset about this.

a while ago my roommate had a small birthday party at our place. two of her friends hit it off and went into the bathroom to do the doodle, which I didn't mind.

unfortunately shortly after I realized that I had to pee really, REALLY badly, so I knocked and asked them to clear the bathroom. there were plenty of other rooms but they chose the only room everyone needed to enter.

I was being direct but still nice and discrete and did my best not to make them feel like they're being shamed or anything. they got noticeably uncomfortable anyway and the guy started joking about how my asexuality just spreads over everyone and kills all the fun. I was really offended by that. I always show respect for other people's sexuality and I don't like being painted as a prude buzzkill in return. I told him that I don't give a flying fuck about anyone having sex here but I'm not going to take my ass outside to pee because he chose to get some in my bathroom. like dude, not my problem.

I ranted about this to my roommate and all she had to say was something along the lines of "well what did you expect? you talk about being asexual all the time, how are people supposed to take that?"

that pissed me off even more. I talk about my sexuality just like allos do. when I'm with friends and the topic comes up, I participate. I don't understand how that counts as "talking about it all the time", like what am I supposed to do? just exclude myself? how would that be fair? I want to be allowed in those spaces just like allos are. if my friends don't want me there, they shouldn't bring it up in my presence.

idk, this whole situation still annoys me and I feel like what my friends said was pretty mean.

https://redd.it/pf34mk
@asexualityonreddit

Ace ppl are cool :D
https://redd.it/pf3qgz
@asexualityonreddit

Why is it so hard to understand?
https://redd.it/pf3ujl
@asexualityonreddit

Yeah. Don't think so
https://redd.it/pf4hyg
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Strong ace vibes
https://redd.it/pf4lty
@asexualityonreddit

Happiness noises
https://redd.it/pf3u92
@asexualityonreddit

WHY EVEN SAY YOU SLEPT WITH SOMEONE WHEN YOU DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING SLEEP
https://redd.it/pf8dih
@asexualityonreddit

My therapist congratulated me on my Asexuality on our last therapy session yesterday

So I've been in therapy with this wonderful godsend of a therapist for about 2 years, and at the beginning of the therapy I had to fill out a lot of questionnaires, and one of the questions was "what is your current sexual drive" with answers
-I'm interested in sex
-I'm not as interested as I used to be
-I'm more interested than I used to be
- I have no interest in sex at all

But the test is quite old and takes lack of sexual drive as a sign of depression. When I started therapy I was severely depressed, and didn't have any interest in sex, like its been for as long as I can remember, so I crossed the last box.

Then during our sessions, we talked a lot about sexuality, my fears, my real needs, and last year I discovered that what really described myself was Asexuality, and she helped me a lot to get to that realisation and showed me some communities and forums to find like minded people, and it's been a life changer for me.

And now yesterday, we had our last session. And as part of the final comparisons and my progress, I filled out the questionnaire again, ticked the same box as two years ago and added a happy smiley face.

And when we went through the results, she smiled at the happy face and counted it as 0 points, so a healthy answer, and told me she is rarely that happy about a before and after answer having the same result, and that she's proud of me :)

She also gifted me a rock as a final parting gift, it looks like a tiny universe and it reminded her of me and I should always remember the progress I made and my life is as limitless as my little universe rock.

It's been a really emotional goodbye for me and I couldn't really share it with anyone, so I just had to let someone know :)

Thank you guys for being here, I'm happy I joined the crew

https://redd.it/pf8ht6
@asexualityonreddit

Another invitation to the ace Planet discord is up now , link in comments . As always hope you enjoy !
https://redd.it/pf9d3a
@asexualityonreddit

Sex positive aces are aces too!

I've been seeing a lot of posts here recently that heavily imply that everyone here is sex repulsed and that hating sex is a given thing here and I just want to say sex positive aces are real and valid too! They are out there and they are beautiful, so we should stop the implied exclusion of them (I know nobody here is deliberately excluding them, but if the trend continues, they may feel excluded nonetheless)

Anyway, hope everyone's doing well, and don't forget to love each other!

https://redd.it/pfcbwl
@asexualityonreddit

lol 💜
https://redd.it/pfcpm1
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idk why they thought this was appropriate
https://redd.it/pfdszj
@asexualityonreddit

Why do some people say sex is a “need”? instead of a “want” or “really want”?

Whenever I hear people talking about sex, they ALWAYS bring up the word “Need.” Like they be saying “Fulfill one of my needs” or “I need to have sex” and stuff like that.
Sex is not a need. If you don’t have sex, you can still be physically and emotionally happy. That may not be your first choice but it’s an option. A need is like food, water, sleep. If you don’t get it, you will die. Or emotional health like connection. There are many ways to connect with someone other then sex. People would say “but I need it to be emotionally happy or physically happy.” There are many tragic things that happen in life. Death of a loved one, Abuse, Losing a limb, these are situations where you would say a need was taken away from you. They still are able or try to find ways to be emotionally and physically healthy. So why do people make sex out to be something that if you don’t have, it’s not worth living sometimes. If you disagree it’s totally cool 😎 This is my personal opinion.

Edit: I do want to say that, as though I really do not believe in the idea of “needing” sex, I do NOT think anyone is “dumb” or “pathetic” for thinking this way. Thinking sex is a need does not mean you don’t deserve respect. You can think however you want to think on this topic. I will think how I want to also. If you do not agree with me, that is perfectly valid.

https://redd.it/pfcuaf
@asexualityonreddit

I watched this video and I feel validated by it. It also explains nicely how they perceive sex-positivity, sex-favourable and sex-repulsed to be. I hope this will help some of y'all!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MUUDzDRLRDI

https://redd.it/pfeu7e
@asexualityonreddit

Just found this virgin-shaming post on Tumblr

And the "lame" made me so angry I felt the need to share it here. I used in the "aphobia" flair just in case, but if wrong, I'll change it.

Honestly, what's wrong or lame about not having sex or being a virgin, for Christ's sake? Sorry, I'm going to scream in a pillow now.

https://preview.redd.it/gwy03gpwbqk71.jpg?width=301&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6ea0c5121ebbff65932aee41c36750d2d2e4288f

https://redd.it/pfapjp
@asexualityonreddit

Partner Recently Came Out to Me

The other day me partner and I were on a video call (we're long-distance). They've known that I'm on the asexual spectrum since before we got together, and we've been together for over a year now.

While we were talking about stuff they said, "I've been talking to my housemate, and I think I'm asexual." They got more into the details about it and I was so happy for them figuring this out about themself. From the get-to they said that they're not a very sexual person, so they were chill with my asexuality. Little did they know they were also ace!

After they told me this I realized that we're such a mirror. Both of us are trans-masc/nonbinary, biromantic, and asexual. We both have a type and it's ourselves apparently. 😂

https://redd.it/pfg7aq
@asexualityonreddit

I have an amazing bff who got me this for my birthday ^_^
https://redd.it/pfjki1
@asexualityonreddit

Anyone else?
https://redd.it/pffeeh
@asexualityonreddit

Getting Cozy With Labeling as Ace ☺️

Before I found I out I was aroace, I bounced around between a couple different labels a lot and would get all excited thinking “yes. Finally, I know how to describe the way I feel.” However, no label truly encompassed my experiences, so I always felt uneasy calling myself bi, queer, pan, etc.

Now, I’ve been identifying as ace for 4 months and aro for a little less than 2 and it’s a completely different experience!

I observe the things that kinda alienate me from my allo peers and realize with a smile that it’s because I’m ace. Even just hearing the word is a warm embrace full of love and assurance. It’s something that’s wiggled into my heart, seeped into my bones, and truly feels like home.

It’s become more than just a label but my IDENTITY as well.

https://redd.it/pfl8ku
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