Asexual boyfriend decided explore his sexual side
(CW sex stuff mentioned)
Hi, I’d really appreciate some advice about my situation. In short, my asexual boyfriend decided he wants to slowly explore his own sexuality, and we’re both trying to find ways to do that.
A bit of backstory — we met about a year and a half ago. Right at the beginning, he told me he’s asexual, he’s never had any sexual experience and didn’t plan to. On the other hand, he’s very into BDSM (just like me), and as a stone-top dominant he’s always been able to satisfy all my sexual and kinky needs. Sexual activities with toys or scenes where he touches my intimate areas don’t bother him — he even enjoys them, as long as he himself isn’t involved physically or using his intimate parts. Because of that, we’ve both been extremely happy in the relationship.
Recently something happened during our usual skin-on-skin cuddles (always non-sexual for us) — he got an erection and asked if I wanted to touch him there. I was shocked, but I did, and we had a few sexually intimate minutes until he became overstimulated and decided it was time for morning coffee (lol).
While we were drinking coffee, I brought up what happened because I wanted to know how he felt about it. He said it was surprisingly pleasant and stimulating, and he’d maybe like to slowly build some sexual intimacy from his side too — but really slowly.
My question is: do you have any ideas how to explore sexual intimacy from asexual side when you are non-sex repulsive asexual? (I don’t know how else to phrase it lol.)
Of course we communicate about this and we’re trying to figure it out together, but we both are clueless and don't know even in which way to think. 😭
https://redd.it/1pakbqe
@asexualityonreddit
(CW sex stuff mentioned)
Hi, I’d really appreciate some advice about my situation. In short, my asexual boyfriend decided he wants to slowly explore his own sexuality, and we’re both trying to find ways to do that.
A bit of backstory — we met about a year and a half ago. Right at the beginning, he told me he’s asexual, he’s never had any sexual experience and didn’t plan to. On the other hand, he’s very into BDSM (just like me), and as a stone-top dominant he’s always been able to satisfy all my sexual and kinky needs. Sexual activities with toys or scenes where he touches my intimate areas don’t bother him — he even enjoys them, as long as he himself isn’t involved physically or using his intimate parts. Because of that, we’ve both been extremely happy in the relationship.
Recently something happened during our usual skin-on-skin cuddles (always non-sexual for us) — he got an erection and asked if I wanted to touch him there. I was shocked, but I did, and we had a few sexually intimate minutes until he became overstimulated and decided it was time for morning coffee (lol).
While we were drinking coffee, I brought up what happened because I wanted to know how he felt about it. He said it was surprisingly pleasant and stimulating, and he’d maybe like to slowly build some sexual intimacy from his side too — but really slowly.
My question is: do you have any ideas how to explore sexual intimacy from asexual side when you are non-sex repulsive asexual? (I don’t know how else to phrase it lol.)
Of course we communicate about this and we’re trying to figure it out together, but we both are clueless and don't know even in which way to think. 😭
https://redd.it/1pakbqe
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
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Hard time seeing the connection between love and sex
Maybe it's trauma based since I did experience unpleasant things against my will in that department when I was a child
But I just can't wrap my head around the fact that people have sex because they love each other. I always understood it for reasons of reproduction since babies don't grow on trees hahah yknow? And I do kinda try to get that people do it because it's supposed to feel good, even though I can't relate to that since i still find it gross. But it just feels wrong to think that you do it out of love? I mean if you love that person why the hell do you need/want to stick your genitals in them or need/want someone to stick into you, like what?? 😅
https://redd.it/1panyjx
@asexualityonreddit
Maybe it's trauma based since I did experience unpleasant things against my will in that department when I was a child
But I just can't wrap my head around the fact that people have sex because they love each other. I always understood it for reasons of reproduction since babies don't grow on trees hahah yknow? And I do kinda try to get that people do it because it's supposed to feel good, even though I can't relate to that since i still find it gross. But it just feels wrong to think that you do it out of love? I mean if you love that person why the hell do you need/want to stick your genitals in them or need/want someone to stick into you, like what?? 😅
https://redd.it/1panyjx
@asexualityonreddit
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Is it just me?
Is it an ace thing to have less of a problem being naked in front of others or is it just me?
https://redd.it/1paqrl5
@asexualityonreddit
Is it an ace thing to have less of a problem being naked in front of others or is it just me?
https://redd.it/1paqrl5
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the asexuality community on Reddit
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