asexuality and Joan of Arc (my reflection)
https://redd.it/1p2e3a5
@asexualityonreddit

I am doing great today! ( sexuality OCD vent sorry if it is a long post)
https://redd.it/1p2flph
@asexualityonreddit

Peferctly Put 😙🤌
https://redd.it/1p2jvxn
@asexualityonreddit

Peferctly Put 😙🤌(Wasn't sure what flair to use)
https://redd.it/1p2jxpf
@asexualityonreddit

What asexual dating platforms are out there?

Just curious if there's anything else besides acespace

https://redd.it/1p2mc18
@asexualityonreddit

Is asexuality part of the queer community?

So I (23f) am bisexual and definitely on the asexuality spectrum, and think of myself as queer. The issue is that I don’t want to say that I am if being asexual is not included in the queer terminology. Anyway idk if that made sense lol and any advice would be greatly appreciated!



https://redd.it/1p2nb1k
@asexualityonreddit

Confused if I am ace or not

Hi, I(25F) am trying to understand where I fall on the sexual orientation spectrum, and I’m confused about whether I might be asexual or trauma-averse to sex. I’ve never felt sexual attraction to anyone, even though I can recognize when someone is attractive like seeing a painting, I mean I get the techniques and strokes but I don't want to disrupt with the painting. I’ve only felt romantic attraction toward men. I enjoy the idea of cuddling, hand-holding, cheek kisses, and emotional closeness, but sexual activity, being naked with someone, or even lip-kissing makes me uncomfortable or nauseous. I have libido during ovulation, but it feels purely physical like being hungry or thirsty. Also, I have a history of sexual abuse (a female relative in childhood for 7 years and assault by a guy when I was 23), so I’m trying to untangle that too. When I told my close friend I might be ace, she said not to label myself because “sexual attraction will come naturally in a serious relationship,” which only confused me more. I want companionship and a long-term partner, but I don’t know where I fit or how to label this. And I feel like getting into a relationship just to see if I am ace or not seems highly unfair to my future partner.

I cannot stop thinking about this and I am highly confused. I live in a pretty conservative place so talking about this openly isn't a viable option. This is kind of gnawing me from inside out so some feedback or advice would be highly appreciated, please.

https://redd.it/1p2vqhi
@asexualityonreddit

'Asexuality isn’t about a lack of intimacy, it’s about redefining it'
https://www.gaytimes.com/community/asexuality-isnt-about-a-lack-of-intimacy-its-about-redefining-it/

https://redd.it/1p2ty0p
@asexualityonreddit

Fork you Shayy [tw: aphobic SA and the like]
https://redd.it/1p2z4o2
@asexualityonreddit

Is it bad for me as someone who isn’t ace to seek dating asexual people?

I don’t like the constant pressure for sex that comes with relationships. It makes me feel uncomfortable and like my body isn’t mine. I do like sex and feel aroused, but usually not as often as the people I’m dating once the newness wears off. I would be fine if I never had it again. It turns into a chore that I constantly have to think about maintaining, and I really don’t want to live my life that way anymore. I want a partner who I wouldn’t be being “cruel” to if I never wanted to have sex again and I want a relationship where sex isn’t the most important thing for a connection. I feel some might say “just find someone like you” but a relationship where I either don’t care about sex or never wanna have sex again is considered cruel and unusual for most people who engage in it. I just wanna know some thoughts on this.

https://redd.it/1p2ykng
@asexualityonreddit

What's your platonic orientation?

...

https://redd.it/1p2xx7s
@asexualityonreddit

Why are people like this? Why do people treat asexuals like they can't be romantically attracted to people because they are ace?

16F here. I think I honestly need some uplifting right now.

Recently I came out to my mom as lesbian ace, and she's been freaking out about it. She keeps yelling about how "it isn't possible to want romance without sex", and "that's all romance is" (its not). My mom can't separate in her head romantic and sexual attraction, and she's driving me insane with all her comments. She keeps saying stuff like: "so you like this girl?", "how do you know you won't ever be attracted to boys? maybe you haven't found the right guy yet!', "so you want to eat girls vaginas?" (cuz apparently that's how lesbians have sex), "maybe its just a girl crush, and you want to be her friend.", "I know your body better than you."

Yes I have a crush on a girl, no I don't want to fuck around with her. I want to hug her, and cuddle, and hold hands, and I want her to call me a "good girl" (don't ask), and maybe kiss her sometimes, and no I still don't want to fuck her. The thought of it disgusts me, it's absolutely repulsive. And its the same with men. I don't wanna fuck around with them either. No disrespect to heteronis, because you are free to like whomever you wish, but the idea of even being with a man repulses me, let alone fucking around with them. I could never imagine myself with a guy in the future, like ever. I always used to imagine myself living with my girl best friend, or not imagining anything at all. People used to even mentioned the idea of marrying a guy, or having a boyfriend, and I would be like "ewwwwww no." Like, I remember when I thought I was gonna end up living in an apartment with my friend after HS, and my mom said "well what are your boyfriends going to think of that?", and I was just confused and was like: "what boyfriend?", and then the conversation I mentioned prior took place.

And the frustrating thing is, that I have had some of those thoughts, and I overcame them (mostly), and she's just yelling them back at me like I'm broken, and that I don't understand myself, and I know she's scared and doesn't understand, but she's not even trying to. She think's I'm obsessed and confused, and that just because "I didn't talk about anything like this before", that these feelings are new, a product of brainwashing, when I've been very clear that I've done extensive research, and that I've literally always felt this way, and now I just have a word for it. She always just brushed me off, calling me "immature", and saying "you don't know what you're talking about, you don't know what you want." I've felt this way since I was fucking ten woman. If my opinion hasn't changed in the past six years of my life, I don't think it's ever going to, but I'm open to the change, if it ever happens. Yuck. It's not a fucking "hormone imbalance", or me being "scared", it's literally me being repulsed and asexual. I don't look at people ever and think "I'd love to get in their pants." I don't masturbate, and was surprised and disgusted when I learn that was a thing. Who wants to touch their privates for fun? And I definitely don't find the idea of sex appealing.

Sorry this is so long but how do I get this to stop? It's become so bad that it's starting to affect my mental health, and it's distracting me from all the other things going on in my life. It's starting to be that whenever I even romanticize about my crush, her negative thoughts enter my mind. I know she's just scared for me, and I just want to help her understand that I'm not broken. Please help.

https://redd.it/1p34dku
@asexualityonreddit

manifesting this love finds me
https://redd.it/1p35gnl
@asexualityonreddit

Found at goodwill
https://redd.it/1p38qqm
@asexualityonreddit

Films/series/books recommandations


Hi. I'm reading a book who talked about asexuality, it's 'Loveless' by Alice Oseman ( not finished it yet but find it interesting ) and i was wondering if someone have some recommandations for movies, series and/or books who talked about asexuality too.
It's recent that i'm thinking about being ace and for now i find it difficult to find some characters to identify with :/ .

https://redd.it/1p3ajdl
@asexualityonreddit

I just really need to vent rn

I'm sorry, but I need to get a few things off my chest somwhere.

I cannot let go of this feeling. This feeling of uselessness. Of not ever having accomplished anything useful. I cannot let go of this fear that everyone around me is just waiting for me to disappear.

I'm a nobody in a world where you need to be a somebody to make it. Whatever I do, it never feels like I'm enough. And I cannot even engage in the probably most important thing of society. (Yes, talking about being ace) And while thats the only thing I'm really proud of in myself, it's still rough sometimes in a society like this.

In my current mind, every person's life is nothing but a chess board. And with every day that passes I feel more and more like I'm nothing but a pawn in everyone else's game. I'm a spare. They only look at me when they cannot do anything else. And as soon as they've reached far enough, they simple swap me out for a better piece. While in my own chess board, I dont even feel like the king.
Dont get me wrong, I've made quite a few friends in my path, but I cannot shake the fear that they'll eventually leave me too.

I've been working so much on myself but I cannot stop thinking "Why do I even bother?"
In the end, all I need is a f*cking hug.

https://redd.it/1p3d0vs
@asexualityonreddit

Kinda vent abt having children

I really want to have children but the thought of marriage disgusts me. I never want a partner never ever, but I really want to have children. I know there are other ways but I was friends with a girl who was born from a donor and she has a lot of anger and confusion on never knowing her full history and I don’t want to put my children through that. I looked into adoption but it’s a lot harder when you’re not married. I don’t know if there is a solution to this so I’m just posting this as a vent but it just makes me sad. I do sometimes wish I was able to be ok with marriage but I’m really not. It doesn’t really feel fair.

https://redd.it/1p3dve4
@asexualityonreddit

Nope.

I don't like men or women. I don't like men or women I like and love myself and that's it!

https://redd.it/1p3fvys
@asexualityonreddit

People genuinely don't understand asexuality

https://redd.it/1p3htvj
@asexualityonreddit