Thinking of coming out
So for context I am 15 and turn 16 in less than half a year. My parents are conservative and a little bit queerphobic and antiLGBTQ+ but this mostly stems from strong religious belief(The church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) I share their religious belief and the church itself is surprisingly accepting of people of all sexualities(Do some research and come to your own conclusions but please don't argue with me about it[If you do decide to research then make sure to use the correct sources 😁\]) although does have some doctrine that some people interpret as such and such LGBTQ+ thing is bad, my parents included, they don't actively hate LGBTQ+ people and they tried to be supportive of my nonbinary sibling(until they started being a jerk) but my church doesn't have ANY doctrine about asexuality whatsoever so I'm honestly not sure how they would react and don't know if I should. Sorry for the unnecessarily long message. TIA!!!!!
https://redd.it/1p1k85i
@asexualityonreddit
So for context I am 15 and turn 16 in less than half a year. My parents are conservative and a little bit queerphobic and antiLGBTQ+ but this mostly stems from strong religious belief(The church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) I share their religious belief and the church itself is surprisingly accepting of people of all sexualities(Do some research and come to your own conclusions but please don't argue with me about it[If you do decide to research then make sure to use the correct sources 😁\]) although does have some doctrine that some people interpret as such and such LGBTQ+ thing is bad, my parents included, they don't actively hate LGBTQ+ people and they tried to be supportive of my nonbinary sibling(until they started being a jerk) but my church doesn't have ANY doctrine about asexuality whatsoever so I'm honestly not sure how they would react and don't know if I should. Sorry for the unnecessarily long message. TIA!!!!!
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Heard rumors
Apparently some people just see attractive people and think; I would like to bang that (eventually, if not immediately). Is this true??? Or like if its a celeb theyll fantasize about it? <-- Im not sure about this one. Is this real?
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Apparently some people just see attractive people and think; I would like to bang that (eventually, if not immediately). Is this true??? Or like if its a celeb theyll fantasize about it? <-- Im not sure about this one. Is this real?
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My partner doesn’t want intimacy “ace mode”
Throwaway account as my partner knows my main and I don’t wanna make them feel uncomfortable.
My partner is trans masc and non binary, this is my first relationship with someone who’s trans and NB as well as my first relationship I feel genuinely safe and comfortable in, I’m doing my damn hardest to learn about it and support them.
Typically our lives are electric, good times had in the bedroom and endless cuddles/kisses, but lately things have been kinda quiet the last few weeks on that front, not a problem - while I have a high drive and can easily out run my partner on the sexual side of things I’m fine sorting myself out. But i have questioned it as it’s not like them to not initiate cuddles.
They told me cuddles are making them feel weird at the moment, like it’s super intimate and it’s sending uncomfortable feelings down their spine, same with sex mentally they want to but physically they’re just not feeling it. They called it their “ace mode” to them cuddles is an aftercare thing. (Even tho we cuddle outside of sex anyway especially before sleeping)
They’ve assured me it’s not me, that mentally they want me and want to pleasure me but their body gets the ick at the idea of performing those actions? They’ve also assured me it’s temporary
I’m not sure how to feel about it, I get it, I think but I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t triggering abandonment issues of mine as well as other things.
I’d appreciate someone else’s thoughts on this/ just an ear so I can vent
https://redd.it/1p1tjph
@asexualityonreddit
Throwaway account as my partner knows my main and I don’t wanna make them feel uncomfortable.
My partner is trans masc and non binary, this is my first relationship with someone who’s trans and NB as well as my first relationship I feel genuinely safe and comfortable in, I’m doing my damn hardest to learn about it and support them.
Typically our lives are electric, good times had in the bedroom and endless cuddles/kisses, but lately things have been kinda quiet the last few weeks on that front, not a problem - while I have a high drive and can easily out run my partner on the sexual side of things I’m fine sorting myself out. But i have questioned it as it’s not like them to not initiate cuddles.
They told me cuddles are making them feel weird at the moment, like it’s super intimate and it’s sending uncomfortable feelings down their spine, same with sex mentally they want to but physically they’re just not feeling it. They called it their “ace mode” to them cuddles is an aftercare thing. (Even tho we cuddle outside of sex anyway especially before sleeping)
They’ve assured me it’s not me, that mentally they want me and want to pleasure me but their body gets the ick at the idea of performing those actions? They’ve also assured me it’s temporary
I’m not sure how to feel about it, I get it, I think but I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t triggering abandonment issues of mine as well as other things.
I’d appreciate someone else’s thoughts on this/ just an ear so I can vent
https://redd.it/1p1tjph
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First time “feeling” like this.
Hello all,
I’m hoping this is okay (first time poster). I didn’t feel comfortable posting this on my main Reddit account so I made this one to log into when needed.
Anyway, I’m not sure how to process what I’m feeling. I’ve been friends with a woman I’ll refer to as “H” for her. We have been friends for many years now. I know I am asexual. I won’t share “H”s sexuality, as that feels disrespectful to share information that she obviously cannot consent to me sharing. I will share thought that we are both females and near the same age as each other.
I’m unsure of what I’m feeling towards her though. Being asexual I’ve never felt genuine romantic or sexual attraction towards someone to know what it feels like. I’m not sure I’m smart enough for the “you just know” recognition, like I’m sure everyone has heard said before. What i have noticed these last few months is that I just always want to be with her. I maintain the same level of stress and anxiety whether I’m with her or not, but when I am around her life feels much easier to mentally cope with. When I’m not around her though I am constantly worried about her. I’m not worried about my place in her life or how she feels about me. I just worry about if she’s doing okay, if she’s safe, if she’s taking care of herself, etc.. I think I have this longing feeling for some kind of contact with her that I never have with others, but not in a NSFW way. Sometimes I think I just want to hold her or be held by her, maybe some light tickles like on our backs or arms, a kiss on the cheek or forehead at the most. Prior to these random feelings, I’ve never liked the idea of participating in any kind of “relationship” activities of the sorts.
It’s unlikely that I would ever confess these feelings to her. I can imagine how uncomfortable I would be if a friend confessed that they might have feelings for me that go beyond a normal friendship. I also would not want to cut contact either because she is my best friend. I’m afraid though. I’m afraid that one day I’ll ruin the best friendship I’ve ever had for feelings I don’t even understand. I’m also afraid that I feel like I suddenly don’t know myself. It took so long to understand and accept the fact that I was asexual. Being that different felt broken, but then it became a new type of comfort and felt like a bunch of weight was off my shoulders. I also feel like I’m too old to be having these school girl type crushes. It feels silly but normal and scary all at once.
Have others gone through a similar situation? For those who didn’t pursue further, was it easy to let those feelings fizzle out? Did you find out more about yourself?
Even if no one has any advice, it was nice to get this off my chest. Thanks in advance to whoever takes the time to read this.
https://redd.it/1p1sxrh
@asexualityonreddit
Hello all,
I’m hoping this is okay (first time poster). I didn’t feel comfortable posting this on my main Reddit account so I made this one to log into when needed.
Anyway, I’m not sure how to process what I’m feeling. I’ve been friends with a woman I’ll refer to as “H” for her. We have been friends for many years now. I know I am asexual. I won’t share “H”s sexuality, as that feels disrespectful to share information that she obviously cannot consent to me sharing. I will share thought that we are both females and near the same age as each other.
I’m unsure of what I’m feeling towards her though. Being asexual I’ve never felt genuine romantic or sexual attraction towards someone to know what it feels like. I’m not sure I’m smart enough for the “you just know” recognition, like I’m sure everyone has heard said before. What i have noticed these last few months is that I just always want to be with her. I maintain the same level of stress and anxiety whether I’m with her or not, but when I am around her life feels much easier to mentally cope with. When I’m not around her though I am constantly worried about her. I’m not worried about my place in her life or how she feels about me. I just worry about if she’s doing okay, if she’s safe, if she’s taking care of herself, etc.. I think I have this longing feeling for some kind of contact with her that I never have with others, but not in a NSFW way. Sometimes I think I just want to hold her or be held by her, maybe some light tickles like on our backs or arms, a kiss on the cheek or forehead at the most. Prior to these random feelings, I’ve never liked the idea of participating in any kind of “relationship” activities of the sorts.
It’s unlikely that I would ever confess these feelings to her. I can imagine how uncomfortable I would be if a friend confessed that they might have feelings for me that go beyond a normal friendship. I also would not want to cut contact either because she is my best friend. I’m afraid though. I’m afraid that one day I’ll ruin the best friendship I’ve ever had for feelings I don’t even understand. I’m also afraid that I feel like I suddenly don’t know myself. It took so long to understand and accept the fact that I was asexual. Being that different felt broken, but then it became a new type of comfort and felt like a bunch of weight was off my shoulders. I also feel like I’m too old to be having these school girl type crushes. It feels silly but normal and scary all at once.
Have others gone through a similar situation? For those who didn’t pursue further, was it easy to let those feelings fizzle out? Did you find out more about yourself?
Even if no one has any advice, it was nice to get this off my chest. Thanks in advance to whoever takes the time to read this.
https://redd.it/1p1sxrh
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I love the asexual community
I love you guys. You make me feel okay. I get so excited when I find out someone is also asexual. I feel like theres an understanding that I can have with you guys that I can’t with allos… that’s nothing against allos, I just think that I feel a camaraderie with a fellow ace in a certain way. And that feeling is something that really brings me joy. Thank you all.
Sorry if this is weird.. Im feeling heartfelt
https://redd.it/1p1uabb
@asexualityonreddit
I love you guys. You make me feel okay. I get so excited when I find out someone is also asexual. I feel like theres an understanding that I can have with you guys that I can’t with allos… that’s nothing against allos, I just think that I feel a camaraderie with a fellow ace in a certain way. And that feeling is something that really brings me joy. Thank you all.
Sorry if this is weird.. Im feeling heartfelt
https://redd.it/1p1uabb
@asexualityonreddit
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