Uncertain of myself
Ok, where do I start. This might be a little long-winded, so buckle up.
I considered posting this with a throwaway account in case someone irl found my account, but here I am. I’ve been going back and forth about posting this for the past few months.
Ok, so I think I might be asexual. It’s 50/50, I go back and forth about it all the time. I’m 99% sure that I’m aromantic, but I’ll get into that later.
I’ll start by saying, Ive never once experienced any form of romantic attraction in any form. Ever. I am active in the aromantic community and have known the at I am probably aromantic for about 1.25 years. I have never once been interested in being in a romantic relationship; growing up, I dreaded the day when I would first experience romantic attraction, but that day fortunately never came. I’m not sure whether I’m asexual, though; that’s what this post is about.
Ok, I really don’t feel comfortable talking about this, even to a bunch of strangers on the internet who I’ll (probably) never meet in real life (hopefully not, that would be a little concerning if I did). Mods, I don’t know if this requires an NSFW tag, but if it does, feel free to add one.
Ok, I’ll just get right into it. When I was a pre-teenager, I saw renaissance-era paintings of naked people of the opposite sex and liked the image of them, although I wasn’t “attracted” to them per se. When I was 14, I accidentally discovered masturbation, and I continued to do this over the next few years until I became addicted to it. (I have since recovered from this addiction, although I still occasionally do it from time to time. However, I never looked at any pornography, real or fictional, while I was doing it. I sometimes thought of the images I had seen while I did it, and later on I thought of other people doing you know what while I masturbated, and in the rare instances where it was me I was thinking of doing you know what while masturbating, it was always with a faceless person, never anyone I actually knew.
Anyways, despite this, I never actually became attracted to anyone, online or in person. However, near the end of my senior year in high school, I saw someone who I legitimately thought to be pretty, the first time I had ever thought that about someone. It was a person of the opposite sex. However, this didn’t come with any uncomfortableness around the person or any desire to be with them. It went away after a few weeks. I was scared that I actually wasn’t aroace, although I now think this may be linked to my repulsion to romance. A few months ago, I saw a person of the same sex who I thought to be aesthetically attractive; it was a similar feeling to the one I got in high school, so I came the the conclusion that I am simply aegosexual.
However, I have doubts. Is my lack of sexual attraction to people linked to the fact that I only ever looked at fictional, idealized images of people? If so, is my aromanticism because of that as well? I really hope not on this point, but I’m 99% sure that this isn’t linked.
This post is just a combination of needing to get this off my chest and being so uncertain about myself, which is not a feeling I particularly like. I realize this would be more appropriate on r/TooAfraidToAskLGBT, but I want opinions from people who are exclusively experienced in this field, and anyways that sub isn’t quite as active.
https://redd.it/1osw52b
@asexualityonreddit
Ok, where do I start. This might be a little long-winded, so buckle up.
I considered posting this with a throwaway account in case someone irl found my account, but here I am. I’ve been going back and forth about posting this for the past few months.
Ok, so I think I might be asexual. It’s 50/50, I go back and forth about it all the time. I’m 99% sure that I’m aromantic, but I’ll get into that later.
I’ll start by saying, Ive never once experienced any form of romantic attraction in any form. Ever. I am active in the aromantic community and have known the at I am probably aromantic for about 1.25 years. I have never once been interested in being in a romantic relationship; growing up, I dreaded the day when I would first experience romantic attraction, but that day fortunately never came. I’m not sure whether I’m asexual, though; that’s what this post is about.
Ok, I really don’t feel comfortable talking about this, even to a bunch of strangers on the internet who I’ll (probably) never meet in real life (hopefully not, that would be a little concerning if I did). Mods, I don’t know if this requires an NSFW tag, but if it does, feel free to add one.
Ok, I’ll just get right into it. When I was a pre-teenager, I saw renaissance-era paintings of naked people of the opposite sex and liked the image of them, although I wasn’t “attracted” to them per se. When I was 14, I accidentally discovered masturbation, and I continued to do this over the next few years until I became addicted to it. (I have since recovered from this addiction, although I still occasionally do it from time to time. However, I never looked at any pornography, real or fictional, while I was doing it. I sometimes thought of the images I had seen while I did it, and later on I thought of other people doing you know what while I masturbated, and in the rare instances where it was me I was thinking of doing you know what while masturbating, it was always with a faceless person, never anyone I actually knew.
Anyways, despite this, I never actually became attracted to anyone, online or in person. However, near the end of my senior year in high school, I saw someone who I legitimately thought to be pretty, the first time I had ever thought that about someone. It was a person of the opposite sex. However, this didn’t come with any uncomfortableness around the person or any desire to be with them. It went away after a few weeks. I was scared that I actually wasn’t aroace, although I now think this may be linked to my repulsion to romance. A few months ago, I saw a person of the same sex who I thought to be aesthetically attractive; it was a similar feeling to the one I got in high school, so I came the the conclusion that I am simply aegosexual.
However, I have doubts. Is my lack of sexual attraction to people linked to the fact that I only ever looked at fictional, idealized images of people? If so, is my aromanticism because of that as well? I really hope not on this point, but I’m 99% sure that this isn’t linked.
This post is just a combination of needing to get this off my chest and being so uncertain about myself, which is not a feeling I particularly like. I realize this would be more appropriate on r/TooAfraidToAskLGBT, but I want opinions from people who are exclusively experienced in this field, and anyways that sub isn’t quite as active.
https://redd.it/1osw52b
@asexualityonreddit
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My freinds reaction to me telling her I am asexual
I told my freind "I thought i might be ace "and she said
" I can't believe that any one cant feel attraction are you sure you arent attracted to dogs or something "
So yea I am not freinds with that person anymore lol
https://redd.it/1osw9g5
@asexualityonreddit
I told my freind "I thought i might be ace "and she said
" I can't believe that any one cant feel attraction are you sure you arent attracted to dogs or something "
So yea I am not freinds with that person anymore lol
https://redd.it/1osw9g5
@asexualityonreddit
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How do you respond to why you don’t want to date?
I’m running out of responses to explain. I’m not aromantic, I just don’t want to date. Never started and don’t plan to rn. Last time I had this convo w/a friend, I said, “I understand the benefits/why, I love to see a healthy couple, but I’m not interested in it myself.”
They couldn’t understand it until they said, “… is it like loving shoes, but not wanting to make shoes?”
I said, “… yeahhhh” lmao they got the spirit though
https://redd.it/1ot2sc7
@asexualityonreddit
I’m running out of responses to explain. I’m not aromantic, I just don’t want to date. Never started and don’t plan to rn. Last time I had this convo w/a friend, I said, “I understand the benefits/why, I love to see a healthy couple, but I’m not interested in it myself.”
They couldn’t understand it until they said, “… is it like loving shoes, but not wanting to make shoes?”
I said, “… yeahhhh” lmao they got the spirit though
https://redd.it/1ot2sc7
@asexualityonreddit
Reddit
From the Asexual community on Reddit
Explore this post and more from the Asexual community