damn okay.
https://redd.it/1oqefnz
@asexualityonreddit

The amount of invasive questions and disregard for folks on the ace spectrum is crazy

I just wanted to vent about this. Every time I'm open about my sexuality, it seems like people feel the need to have free reign to ask deeply personal and invasive questions about what it looks like--or disregard my identity completely. It's so frustrating to me. Especially because I have friends in my life that do this too. I can tell they don't "believe me." I hate it.

Questions like
-Well, do you enjoy sex?
-How can you be asexual if you have sex?
-You know normal people dont want to hook up with everyone they see either, right?

On and on. I just want to fire back with "well, how do you know you're straight? How do you know you're gay?"

Like, you just know. You figure it out. I've spent years agonizing that I felt like a piece of me was missing because I didnt experience the same sexual attraction everyone else does. I hate being dog piled and dismissed even by members of a community that are supposed to accept non-traditional sexualities.

That's all. Just wanted to vent.

https://redd.it/1oqb5sc
@asexualityonreddit

Sex and Sexuality

https://preview.redd.it/0voyyininqzf1.png?width=1545&format=png&auto=webp&s=76af33614580cb4e2b44e36f21bb9feeba853989

Hi there,

Im looking to get more participants for my groups and I research study. We’re conducting our research study on if sexual identity has an influence on sexual pleasures. The more participants the better- would highly appreciate the participation!

https://calstatela.co1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_6eOrEbBCp3g9KGa

https://redd.it/1oqhdki
@asexualityonreddit

I just came out. So relieved.

I had a total meltdown post therapy with my brother (we live together). Explained that I loved my bf but didnt care about sex and didnt know what to do. My brother was entirely calm and told me ' I feel the exact same way'

I thought i was insane for feeling like sex was just a side. Turns out my brother felt the same way this whole time.

https://redd.it/1oqfk9m
@asexualityonreddit

I feel ashamed of my desire for only cuddling and not sex


I (37M) separated from my partner (35M) of nine years a few months ago.

Reflecting on the relationship and my own feelings since separating, it has become clear to me that I am asexual.

After dipping my toe back into the dating pool for the first time this week, I raised my lack of interest in sex with my therapist. She started to “reassure” me that my interest in sex would return as I heal from the separation, find a new partner, etc.

I had to clarify that there isn’t anything to “return”. Sex has always been something I’ve done because it was the expectation, not because I ever wanted it.

I’ve known that about myself for a while. What I’m realizing now, however, is that I still have physical desires.

I want to cuddle. I want to kiss. I want to touch. I want skin contact. I want to rest my head on someone’s lap and feel his hands running through my hair.

I feel embarrassed by this. These feel like the kinds of things a child wants, not a gay man pushing 40.

How do you handle the fact that you don’t have “grown up” desires?

How do you communicate this to other people without feeling embarrassed?

https://redd.it/1oqgxp8
@asexualityonreddit