Assexual with high libido?

Basically, as the title suggests

I usually have a high libido but self pleasure is enough for me. Have tried sex in many different ways and honestly can't even get it up most of the times with other people. Never understood my friends who "had to f*ck" and would go out with any tinder date just for it.

Even when I'm in a relationship I prefer self pleasure instead of pursuing my partner.

Does this make me ace? Honestly the only thing I "miss" about sex is the idea of intimacy. Which in itself kind of shows I'm not "pleased" by sex? If the only thing I miss is the idealized intimacy of the situation.

I've always been kind, considerate in my past relationships, did surprise dates, flowers, communication, just an overall healthy relationship . But all of them have ended due to sex related issues. I'm not "bad" in bed, I simply never pursued them sexually because I wasn't interested in that, and they didn't feel "desired".

I'm curious if any assexuals here have a similar experience of having a high libido but no interest in sex. Therapy hasn't helped much and I'm curious if I'm ace or just have some sort of blockage with sex (maybe not feeling comfortable with others, don't like feeling vulnerable, etc)

https://redd.it/1ogegcu
@asexualityonreddit

how do aces date allos?

I'm ace and I would definitely prefer an asexual partner because I feel like I'd feel almost uncomfortable(?) with a sexual partner, but ik that's pretty uncommon (to find aces). For those who are dating allos, how do they idk manage their libido(?) without hooking up or having sex w you?

https://redd.it/1og9jqk
@asexualityonreddit

Made this small "bracelet" of the asexual flag (Might change flair)
https://redd.it/1ogimpd
@asexualityonreddit

Made garlic bread to celebrate Ace Week yesterday! Plus my outfits from the week and a lanyard and some dice I made

https://redd.it/1oghzmi
@asexualityonreddit

Made this "bracelet" of the Asexual flag
https://redd.it/1ogiu7m
@asexualityonreddit

I hadn't known that the word "cake" was used as an euphemism for ass or butt until recently. It's kind of ironic? that there are many memes about asexual loving cakes
https://redd.it/1ogkp5d
@asexualityonreddit

Am I an Asexual if I yearn for it but cannot feel it or I just havent met the right person?

My experience with asexuality is full of doubt. That's a given, of course, since that's how you figure it out. But the weird thing I experienced was how that doubt was fueled by the partners I've had.

At first, I genuinely believed that I would like intimacy since I've consumed so much content around it. But when I experienced my first interaction with intimacy, I did not feel any arousal at all. I convinced myself that I'll like it eventually, but it did not happen. The worst part was that my partner would encourage me to spice things up, but I could not fake what I felt anymore.

Then I thought maybe it was the person I was with, but it went the same direction with the next two partners I had.

They all said the same thing, "Oh, what if you try this and you'll like it," and I just want to pull my hair out because I tried, and the answer is no. Sometimes I envy other couples; I also want to feel pleasure.

In recent years, I'm still filled with doubt. How many years do I have to figure it out and doubt myself? I wish I knew the answer.

Your thoughts?

https://redd.it/1ogljhj
@asexualityonreddit