Advice needed - What surgery am I supposed to get if I’m not going to reproduce?

Hi, r/asexuality! I’ve been thinking a lot about this recently and I wasn’t sure if this was the appropriate place to ask- so if it’s not please redirect me to where it is- but what kind of surgery am I supposed to get if I’m not going to reproduce?

For a little more context, I have a uterus and I have a period every month. Since I’m never going to have sex with anyone, nor will I (obviously) ever try for a pregnancy, is it really necessary for me to have a period?

Is there some kind of surgery I can get to make the periods stop and make me unable to reproduce?



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are dragon tattoos a symbol of asexuality?

CONTEXT i am an allosexual, but i thought i’d ask people on the ace spectrum about this. i’ve always wanted a dragon tattoo and one of my special interests are dragons. i love mythology and all that. but it’s come to my attention that the ace community has an affinity for them, and a lot of people get dragon tattoos to symbolize that.

i don’t want to be mistaken for being ace. not that there’s anything wrong with it, because there absolutely isn’t, but if i’m going out with a potential partner i don’t want them to get the wrong idea. or worse, they stop interacting/persuing anything because they think i’m ace. is this (getting a dragon tattoo) a genuine thing i should reconsider to avoid confusion? or am i just chronically online and it doesn’t matter?

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Married for 5 years and I think im ace

Hello I have been married to a ma for 5 years and after having a child(3) with this man I feel like I may have been ace all along because I hate sex. To have a bit of back story growing up I never thought about sex, hated talking about sex and only did it because I thought it was the right thing to do. I got married to a guy and at first we had sex quite often agian I thought it was just what people did and did not want to seem weird. I was a very sheltered kid and am still trying to find out who I really am at 28. My mom was a narcissist and basically told me no to anything that interested me but that's a totally diffrent story just take from that I have a very hard time speaking my mind and boundaries are an issue. So I married this man and had a kid with him in 2021 because that what I was "supposed" to do in my head & my parents never shut up about wanting a grandkids Now not only am I afraid to get pregnant again by accident, I just hate sex in general.

I have tried telling my husband that I just don't think about sex, like it's never on my radar even. His response was that he has needs too and he didn't sign up for this when we got married.
I am just so confused because I feel like I have to lie to myself about who I really am. I don't know what to do.

Sorry if this post doesn't belong in this forum, if you think it would be better somewhere else please let me know

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How my asexuality has protected me

I never knew there was a term for what I was until three years ago. I'm 23 now.

Back in high school, there was no pining after boys, no distractions pulling me away from my studies, and none of the usual teenage drama. Instead, I was quiet, alone, and thriving in solitude—losing myself in books, finishing the Harry Potter series multiple times, and earning top grades. Sitting by myself at lunch never bothered me. Being the butt of jokes for not having romantic interests didn't faze me either because I genuinely didn't understand the humor behind it. I simply didn’t grasp why people thought something was wrong with a smart, pretty girl who wasn’t interested in romance or seeking male attention,(or female amorous attention either)

I want to be clear: I don’t mean to shame or insult the natural desires people have. Being a teenager with raging hormones is tough, and what I observed around me was just normal teenage behaviour.

But I was protected all the same—from gossip, abusive language, backstabbing friends, and vicious girls fighting over the same boy. I was spared from the drama of breakups, the jealousy-fueled fights, and the toxic relationships that many of my peers experienced. I was protected from the emotional turmoil of unrequited love, the pressure to conform to romantic expectations, and the heartache of betrayal. High school parties, where bad decisions often lead to regrettable consequences, were not part of my world. I was sheltered from the anxieties of trying to fit in, the fears of rejection, and the constant search for validation through others. My asexuality became an unseen shield, guarding me against the chaos that so often entangles young lives.

Now,I am in university.

Now,I will spend years and years,fighting to get the one and ONLY career path I want

And the advantages remain with me because of what I am

I’m not preoccupied with the so-called "ticking clock" of my childbearing years,or my "peak fertility" coming to an end in my twenties. The societal pressure to hurry up and find a mate, to get married, and to settle down simply doesn’t affect me. I find myself free from the anxiety that comes with searching for "the one." I'm not running around on dating apps, lamenting the supposed shortage of good men, nor am I caught up in the exhausting cycle of dating and heartbreak.

I’m not making devastating, impulsive, life-altering decisions that I see so many young people around me making—decisions driven by the fear of being alone or the need to meet societal milestones. Instead, I’m focused on my own path, unhindered by the distractions and pressures that come with seeking romantic fulfillment. This freedom allows me to invest fully in my passions, my growth, and my future, without the constant worry of whether I’m on track with someone else’s timeline.

(Really, Sarah? You’re 24, in nursing school, with a bright future ahead of you! Why on earth are you dropping out to marry a guy with failing grades? A guy who only now decided to pursue a relationship with you after all the nonsense he’s been pulling with countless other young women,some of them not even of legal age? And you want to have a kid with him? Seriously?! Do you think that will make him love you more? Newsflash: being the mother of his child won’t magically turn him into a devoted partner. Being a "young mom" isn’t some fairytale—it’s a lifelong responsibility, not a cute Instagram post. WHY? WHY? WHY? For the love of all that is holy, WHY? Are you really doing this for love? For sex? He doesn’t love you, Sarah. He’ll leave you when you hit 40, with a bunch of his children in tow, because boys like him never grow up. I’ve seen it happen, over and over again. It’s inevitable—like watching a train wreck in slow motion, knowing there’s nothing you can do to stop it. I’ve seen it up close, happen to two good and decent women.)

(Someone, please, make it make sense. Why do people do this to themselves? Am I the only one screaming internally at the sheer lack of sense in the people around me?)

On a

darker note, I realize that my asexuality has provided me with a degree of protection from male violence. I am somewhat shielded from the inherent misogyny that so many men bring into their romantic relationships—the jealousy, the narcissism, the need to control. I’m protected from the devastating effects of financial abuse, where a partner can strip away your independence and leave you trapped. I’m insulated from the horrors of physical abuse, from the terror and trauma of sexual abuse, and from the risks of sexually transmitted infections. I’m not vulnerable to being manipulated or controlled, to having my life’s potential stifled by someone who doesn’t truly love me but pretends to for their own gain.

In a patriarchal society that often leaves women at the mercy of men, I find myself standing outside that dynamic, untouched by its most harmful aspects. I’m not at risk of having decades of my life stolen by a man who would use me, drain me, and discard me when I’m no longer convenient for him.

I didn’t realize it at the time, but by simply living as I am, I was "decentering" men—removing them from the core of my life and my decisions. I wasn’t intentionally aligning myself with any particular feminist ideology, like the "4B movement" that seeks to reject male-centered societal norms. It just happened naturally, as a result of who I am. In a world where so many women are pressured to prioritize men’s desires and needs, I unknowingly carved out a space where I could exist on my own terms, free from those constraints.

I exist,only for me.Only to provide kindness and compassion to the human beings around me in the life path that I know I want.

I PROUDLY embrace my asexuality.I OWN it.I am not ashamed of it

I Thank God for it

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I came out to my boyfriend as ace

We've only been together for 2 months, and i knew i would need to tell him eventually but i didn't know when. It kinda randomly came up in one of our convos, and i was honestly a nervous wreck. He was really understanding and nice and told me to tell him if he ever does something that makes me uncomfortable and he'd stop. I was really suprised and im so bad with words, but im so happy. An old friend would tell me all the time that no one would date me because im asexual, and i really internalized that, but i guess its not true.

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Ace bc "maybe my hormones are off"??

I (16) had a Dr's appointment earlier today for a well visit and med check, and we were waiting for awhile so my mom asked to read these two pages of questions I'd filled out

One of those questions was like "are you attracted to boys/girls/both/none (circle one)" and I circled none. I've come out to her several times as asexual lol bc the first time she thought I'd outgrow it

Anyway here's the convo when she read that (not 100% word for word bc it's been over two hours)

Mom: you're really not attracted to anyone? Guys, or girls?...

Me: no

Mom: maybe you should get bloodwork done, maybe there's something wrong with your hormones

Me: Literally starts laughing bc its such a classic line but also one I've never heard before personally

Mom: I'm serious

Me: what hormones would they be checking though exactly? What would be the problem?

I dont remember exactly what she said after that but she didn't rlly have an answer, I pretty much said "I don't need bloodwork," and the Dr came in soon after that

Anyway I get to mark another square off on the ace bingo card lolll

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Why are people like that?
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As a Latin student I hate the word aphobia

Friends, Romans, Country men lend me your ears. I hate the word aphobia as when taken apart it’s the prefix a which means not or without and phobia means an extreme or irrational fear of or aversion to something. So when they are put together it would mean they don’t have any phobia yet every time I’ve seen it used it’s supposed to mean phobia to asexuality. I propose we use the word acephobic instead.

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A Deck of Aces
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With all do respect to allosexuals..

There are allosexual who use sexuality as thier persona and it BOILS my blood. I go places with my ace of spades card necklace and one guy said to me "you know it's an upside down heart , just like ass" I'm already repulsed by sex , why T_T

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Asexuals who do have sex…

What do you think about while having it? I’m (23F) asexual with a partner (26f) who isn’t. She’s accepted me and my boundaries, and I’m indifferent to sex so I still pleasure her.

I was wondering what other sex indifferent/favorable asexuals think about? Personally, my head plays the Pokemon Gen 3 music, and I’ve associated it with her because it’s my comfort game and she’s my comfort person. Would love to hear anyone else’s thoughts too!

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Garlic bread.
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What the fuck over my song lyrics
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Asexuals who do have sex…

What do you think about while having it? I’m (23F) asexual with a partner (26f) who isn’t. She’s accepted me and my boundaries, and I’m indifferent to sex so I still pleasure her.

I was wondering what other sex indifferent/favorable asexuals think about? Personally, my head plays the Pokemon Gen 3 music, and I’ve associated it with her because it’s my comfort game and she’s my comfort person. Would love to hear anyone else’s thoughts too!

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Garlic bread.
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Had sex with my girlfriend who is asexual while we were both high on mushrooms and now it’s really fucking awkward to talk to her what should I do?

So basically we both took 3.5 g and a few hours later we were snuggling and we just kept getting closer and then you know it happened. It was really nice. She enjoyed it in the moment but after we got sober, it was like what the fuck.
Sorry for any poor grammar I’m smoking weed and using voice to text

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I owned The Liberals With Facts And Logic
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reddit / any social media makes me feel confused and it's unenjoyable

for some reason i get a lot of posts recommended to me with the title "am I attractive?" or "rate me". i genuinely don't experience any sexual attraction or attraction to appearance (also, too add on, i do not experience romantic attraction either). no, i can't rate you! no one is attractive to me!
so much posts on the internet are related to looks or porn or so on and i do not fit in.

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Are there any EMS/EMTs/doctors/nurses here that are sex repulsed?

Sex repulsed ace here, mostly bc I really don't like the human body with all its ick factor fluids and whatever. But for some reason I'm thinking I want to be and EMT or EMS except I just can't think in my mind that I would be able to tolerate that ick factor.

So I wanted to know, are there any aces here that feel similarly but are grossed out by this kinda stuff? Did you need to do anything to overcome it? Advice much appreciated, I keep going back and forth about this and I want to just jump the gun and decide if it's something I should do.

Tia

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