A+ response
https://redd.it/1ewh48g
@asexualityonreddit

What do you think about my current pfp?
https://redd.it/1ewhiw6
@asexualityonreddit

Where else would a drink go?
https://redd.it/1ewjsyh
@asexualityonreddit

It’s so frustrating. We as a society could agree that homophobia is bad. But aphobia is still the norm. Why?

It’s so frustrating to still have to deal with it on a daily basis. On another app I was downvoted to hell for reporting a guy that said to an asexual girl that her „perceived“ asexuality is just a blockade stemming from her childhood trauma. I reported it as discrimination which of course wasn’t blocked and while complaining about it one guy called me snowflake and that it was just an opinion and I should get over it while being downvoted to hell. Not a single person stepped up, everyone was against me and this girl was also alone. The worst thing, the guy that called me snowflake and downplayed it as opinion said that he’s gay. We don’t even have the back of other non allos. It’s so sickening and frustrating that everyone can just freely be aphobic and no one will held them accountable.

https://redd.it/1ewqlod
@asexualityonreddit

Prescription: Sex

Hey guys

I'm in the process of getting tested for endometriosis, and the best scan is a deep infiltrating one. I called up to make an appointment and they said they don't do it for people who are still virgins. I vary between sex repulsed and indifferent. I don't know what to do because I don't want to have sex, and I don't have a partner anyway, but my periods are really bad. There's only the one chain of places that do the scan I need, and they won't do it.

Any ideas?

https://redd.it/1ewmu7c
@asexualityonreddit

it's a kind of magic 🎵
https://redd.it/1ewqkcp
@asexualityonreddit

Do you ever get paranoid you’re not really ace and you’re lying to yourself?

I have mental illness and get paranoia about a lot of things. I get paranoid that I want to m*ruder people for fun even though I don’t. Intrusive thoughts that I try to block out. I get paranoid that I don’t really love my mom even tho she’s my everything. One of the paranoias is that I’m not being my genuine self. That I’m faking so much and lying to everyone. Even tho im not. Have any of you experienced this?

https://redd.it/1ewoe3i
@asexualityonreddit

Are you a top or a bottom?
https://redd.it/1ewuqio
@asexualityonreddit

I'm a 28 yo virgin and, despite not wanting sex, I feel ashamed for not having it. Have others felt the same/overcome this?

Im 28f and have never had sex. Up until about a year ago, it never actually occured to me to care about that. I wasn't bothered and didnt care to pursue sex as I wasn't interested and honestly am kind of averse/repulsed (not sure which term fits me better) by the idea of having sex. It wasn't until I started thinking about dating that I realized how uncommon being a virgin at my age was. I fell down an internet wormhole, reading posts about how being a virgin in late twenties is a red flag and not worth dating. Im not really sure I even want romance. All I want is to not be alone and being in a couple seems like the most reliable way to do that. I was in a dark place for a bit and my therapist has been a great help. She has suggested that I should focus on accepting my asexuality rather than trying to change it. I've been reading and watching videos about others asexual experiences and have met other ace people in my town. I still feel like an outsider tho. The ace friends I've made have all had sex and romantic relationships. Even if they are completely unattached and abstinent now, I can't get over how they had similar hang ups to me but we're still able e to make sex and dating work for a time. Anytime I came close to dating or having sex I bailed so fast. Everything in my body was telling me to run. I wish I didn't feel so ashamed of not pursuing something I don't even want but I do. I wish i could stand face to face with another person like me.

https://redd.it/1ewszq3
@asexualityonreddit

Thyroid's issues fixed, still aroace

On may I had surgery and my thyroid was removed. Long story short, it turn out I had a never diagnosed chronic lymphocytic thyroiditis, and that was probably the reason of a lot of health issues I had during my life. The surgeon told me that in a couple of months my health was going to improve and added: "I bet you'll be no more asexual by then."
Four months later, I'm still aroace with no libido.
Of course I'm taking my meds, and get checked every month. My blood tests show a perfect ormonal balance, my vitamin D levels are in range, I've lost weight, so my health issues are all fixed.
I bet the surgeon will be disappointed at our next appointment.

https://redd.it/1eww5d6
@asexualityonreddit

never thought I was ace till I had sex

I (24f) started having sex with my boyfriend (28m) last year, I lost my virginity with him. Ever since I was little and discovered sex I never was repulsed by it. I think I had a higher libido then (still low by standars) than now . I always thought of sex as something I wanted to had with someone I loved, I never searched for it though. Thought that eventually I'd met someone and it would be magical, like in the movies. It took 6 months of dating to lose my virginity with my boyfriend, and after it was done I thought: That was it?? Ever since I had lots of conversations with him about our poor frequency of intimacy. Our last fight was the worst, that's when I started researching asexuality and felt identified by a lot of things regarding sex. For example: him always starting it and me avoiding it.
I thought maybe I didn't like him that way, but after thinking it a lot, I realized that I really didn't care about having sex (it's more trouble that it's worth), which is funny since I am aegosexual and read a lot of smutty stuff. But sometimes I doubt myself, what if I idealize sex too much and thats why I don't enjoy it?
Since I told him I might be ace, he's been hopeful (because he doesn't want to end the relationship before trying to work it out) but also he's been struggling. I think he's sad that I am not sexually attracted to him, and I don't know how to handle it...

https://redd.it/1ewx1rh
@asexualityonreddit

Out of curiosity, how many people discovered they were ace through Reddit?

I am currently working on my MA dissertation, looking at the interplay between Reddit and ace identity and am wondering: How many of you realized you were ace because of this or other ace subreddits?

I did. I had come across AVEN years before, but the info there didn't really resonate with me at the time, I feel like maybe because of how it was phrased. The descriptions of the ace experience felt kind of sterile to me (no shade, just my personal impression). Not knowing anything about asexuality then, I conflated sexual attraction with attraction as a whole, and I thought "Well, I can acknowledge if someone is attractive", so quickly discarded the idea that I might be ace without bothering to look much deeper.
It was only years later on Reddit that I saw some more varied personal descriptions of how people experienced their aceness that I realized that asexuality can take on lots of different forms and that I related to many of those stories.

Has anyone had a similar experience? Or maybe an opposite one? :)


https://redd.it/1ex06i5
@asexualityonreddit

Anybody else struggle with wanting to viewed as attractive but also disgusted by the idea of being sexualized with no control.

But then again, I feel like if I had no control then I could finally relax.

https://redd.it/1ex4x5p
@asexualityonreddit

what is sleep bro
https://redd.it/1ex4gap
@asexualityonreddit

Folks, I present to you: a video of all of us

https://redd.it/1ex8iaf
@asexualityonreddit

Great conversation

https://redd.it/1ex9dgy
@asexualityonreddit

Need i say more?
https://redd.it/1ex8u2s
@asexualityonreddit

would it be okay to ask my bf this?

i’m ace and my partner is not. it’s been suggested that we open the relationship for sexual encounters so that he as an allo can still get his needs met. however i was wondering if it would be acceptable for me to say that it would work both ways (i.e if he can sleep with others then so can i) i doubt i’d even want to do so but for some reason having it go both ways makes me feel more comfortable with it for some reason?

https://redd.it/1excou1
@asexualityonreddit

Has a man ever wanted to ask you some questions and then proceeded to ask you 50 million sexual ones?

My male friend hasn't talked to me in what seems like 2 days then all of a sudden tonight he messages asking if he can ask me some questions. I said yes thinking nothing of it then he starts asking me all these sexual questions. Asking if I've played with myself, if I've cum, what I'm wearing, the size of my chest, Etc. He then starts asking questions like if we were married would you give me head if we were married would you do this if we were married would you do that. Also something I found a little creepy and a little weird was that when he asked if I ever touched myself and how old I was.

We have never talked about dating or even expressed to each other that we like each other in that way which I do not. So I don't know where all these questions are coming from and not only that he's polyamorous and told me the reason is because he can't find a lifelong partner. Which to me doesn't make any sense as the reason so if someone can make sense of that could you let me know.

But my question is why are men like this and why do they feel the need to ask us all these personal intimate questions when we're just friends. Now I can't speak for every asexual out there but why is it when men hear the word asexual they got to ask all these weird questions and intimate ones at that like I guess that they're curious but come on now.

https://redd.it/1exgcia
@asexualityonreddit

I’m now officially in a gay asexual relationship and I’ve never felt so happy 🥹🥹

We’re both homoromantic male asexuals. We actually met on Tinder of all places 💀 After talking the entire summer and having a few dates along the way, I witnessed the northern lights for the first time ever. Witnessing them alone, I gradually realized that I truly felt that I loved this man and wanted him to be my boyfriend. I caught myself wishing he was there with me. When I saw a shooting star go through the lights, my first unconscious thought was a wish that he and I would be together soon. I then wished I had his warm body to cuddle up against as it got colder. When I stood up to leave, I felt a way emotionally that I had never felt before thats hard to describe; I basically felt content and secure, like I knew he was the one, and it was my time to make things official.


I planned another date with him as soon as I could. He lives a couple hours away, so it wasnt until a week later. Regardless, the feelings I felt that night never left. I took him out to to restaurant that meant a lot to me, got ice cream, showed him around my campus, and then took him to a really romantic spot in the forest on campus after the sun had just gone down, and asked him if he wanted to be my boyfriend. And well, as the title reads, he said yes yall :) (we both got very emotional)

He’s so very much my type, both personality and looks-wise, and it’s insane how much we have in common. I’d attach a picture of us, but I don’t fully feel comfortable doing so on here lol. Again, we’re both homoromantic male aces, so we feel very comfortable around each other and our expectations in a relationship. So yeah. Dubs for the gay male aces, we exist, and relationships like ours are possible!!!! I’m just so glad to call him my boyfriend :))))

https://redd.it/1exgvjs
@asexualityonreddit