The nightly question. Also, they're beautiful, but, like, "I want to look at you for hours" beautiful, not "I want to stick my dick in you" beautiful. Y'know?
https://redd.it/q6qdby
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/q6qdby
@asexualityonreddit
Feel like I’m drowning
I’m allosexual, and have been dating my Ace girlfriend since freshmen year of high school (we’re college freshmen now). I’m a sexual person, I’m not going to lie. But I’ve always been willing to put that off the table for her. But lately I’ve just been overwhelmed, not by the lack of sex, but by the lack of any physical intimacy at all. I feel completely touch starved. And more than that, I feel emotionally neglected to a certain extent. I mean I know she loves me, and I try to speak her love languages, but I’m just not getting admissions of love in mine. I just want to be fucking held man. I love her to death, and I know she loves me too. I feel like she’s not only sex repulsed, but touch repulsed too, even though she’s said many times that she likes cuddling and the like. I’m scared I’m going to start resenting her or something. Especially given the fact that I don’t think I can be celibate all my life. I’m willing to keep trying, but I feel as though I’m missing something important. I don’t want just the orgasms, I want to make love to a woman that I love. I completely respect her sexuality, and I would never make her do something she doesn’t want to do. I just don’t know what to do. Sorry for the mess, I’m not with it enough right now to properly write out my emotions/thoughts. I have a much more detailed post in my post history, if anyone’s curious enough to go read that. Any thoughts/advice would be welcome.
https://redd.it/q6xf1p
@asexualityonreddit
I’m allosexual, and have been dating my Ace girlfriend since freshmen year of high school (we’re college freshmen now). I’m a sexual person, I’m not going to lie. But I’ve always been willing to put that off the table for her. But lately I’ve just been overwhelmed, not by the lack of sex, but by the lack of any physical intimacy at all. I feel completely touch starved. And more than that, I feel emotionally neglected to a certain extent. I mean I know she loves me, and I try to speak her love languages, but I’m just not getting admissions of love in mine. I just want to be fucking held man. I love her to death, and I know she loves me too. I feel like she’s not only sex repulsed, but touch repulsed too, even though she’s said many times that she likes cuddling and the like. I’m scared I’m going to start resenting her or something. Especially given the fact that I don’t think I can be celibate all my life. I’m willing to keep trying, but I feel as though I’m missing something important. I don’t want just the orgasms, I want to make love to a woman that I love. I completely respect her sexuality, and I would never make her do something she doesn’t want to do. I just don’t know what to do. Sorry for the mess, I’m not with it enough right now to properly write out my emotions/thoughts. I have a much more detailed post in my post history, if anyone’s curious enough to go read that. Any thoughts/advice would be welcome.
https://redd.it/q6xf1p
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
Feel like I’m drowning
I’m allosexual, and have been dating my Ace girlfriend since freshmen year of high school (we’re college freshmen now). I’m a sexual person, I’m...
Is it normal to be repulsed by the idea of having sex with the opposite gender but somewhere between neutral and mildly repulsed by the same gender?
https://redd.it/q6zm4x
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/q6zm4x
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
Is it normal to be repulsed by the idea of having sex with the...
Posted in r/asexuality by u/ThePipYay • 97 points and 12 comments
I get it but it’s tiring
All these posts from allos talking about how miserable they are dating asexuals is really doing a number on my confidence tbh
I get that this is a good place to get advice, but there’s just been so many recently and it just makes me feel kinda hopeless
It feels like there’s a new post every day with the exact same story about how they love their partner but they’re fundamentally incompatible
I wish I had the self-confidence not to get mopey over a couple of failed relationships, but it just seems to reaffirm my fears that my identity is fundamentally a burden
https://redd.it/q78ra4
@asexualityonreddit
All these posts from allos talking about how miserable they are dating asexuals is really doing a number on my confidence tbh
I get that this is a good place to get advice, but there’s just been so many recently and it just makes me feel kinda hopeless
It feels like there’s a new post every day with the exact same story about how they love their partner but they’re fundamentally incompatible
I wish I had the self-confidence not to get mopey over a couple of failed relationships, but it just seems to reaffirm my fears that my identity is fundamentally a burden
https://redd.it/q78ra4
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
I get it but it’s tiring
All these posts from allos talking about how miserable they are dating asexuals is really doing a number on my confidence tbh I get that this is...
Ace representation in the German Hygiene Museum in Dresden in their sexuality exhibit. Was kinda nice to see this
https://redd.it/q7aceg
@asexualityonreddit
https://redd.it/q7aceg
@asexualityonreddit
Ignoring your asexuality can be harmful to your mental AND physical health.
I commented this on another post, but I thought it was important to share more widely, because I don't think people—asexual and not—consider the dangers asexual people face specifically.
Trust your feelings, stand up for yourself, and never settle on a partner who doesn't get it.
When I was \~15, I came out to my friends as asexual. They told me I was just being immature. Believing them, I tried to "not be asexual." I found a boyfriend who loved sex; when we would meet, he wanted it several times a day. I convinced myself I liked it, because my body did the "right" things—lubricated, sometimes O'ed...
But in my head, the asexuality never went away. I didn't realise until a couple years ago that coercion was a thing and that 99% of my sexual encounters were non-consensual. I had to be convinced almost every single time. And boy, did that explain a lot. Though I gave in to sex on the outside, my body did not, and in the background, my mind was secretly tucking away a bunch of trauma.
In fact, my reluctance led to vaginismus (pelvic floor dysfunction) that caused pain upon insertion amongst other symptoms that I deal with daily and have been told I will have to handle for life. This led to even more trauma to the point I now physically shake any time anyone—including doctors—approach that part of me. I said to my ex that I thought I was asexual, and he just said "No you're not, you're just scared. You'll love it once you're fixed." That ex turned out to be abusive, anyway 🤷♀️
Basically, friends and partners ignoring your sexuality can actually be very harmful, so it's important to find someone who respects you.
https://redd.it/q7cid1
@asexualityonreddit
I commented this on another post, but I thought it was important to share more widely, because I don't think people—asexual and not—consider the dangers asexual people face specifically.
Trust your feelings, stand up for yourself, and never settle on a partner who doesn't get it.
When I was \~15, I came out to my friends as asexual. They told me I was just being immature. Believing them, I tried to "not be asexual." I found a boyfriend who loved sex; when we would meet, he wanted it several times a day. I convinced myself I liked it, because my body did the "right" things—lubricated, sometimes O'ed...
But in my head, the asexuality never went away. I didn't realise until a couple years ago that coercion was a thing and that 99% of my sexual encounters were non-consensual. I had to be convinced almost every single time. And boy, did that explain a lot. Though I gave in to sex on the outside, my body did not, and in the background, my mind was secretly tucking away a bunch of trauma.
In fact, my reluctance led to vaginismus (pelvic floor dysfunction) that caused pain upon insertion amongst other symptoms that I deal with daily and have been told I will have to handle for life. This led to even more trauma to the point I now physically shake any time anyone—including doctors—approach that part of me. I said to my ex that I thought I was asexual, and he just said "No you're not, you're just scared. You'll love it once you're fixed." That ex turned out to be abusive, anyway 🤷♀️
Basically, friends and partners ignoring your sexuality can actually be very harmful, so it's important to find someone who respects you.
https://redd.it/q7cid1
@asexualityonreddit
reddit
Ignoring your asexuality can be harmful to your mental AND...
I commented this on another post, but I thought it was important to share more widely, because I don't think people—asexual and not—consider the...