Why is it so difficult to date as an asexual?

I don’t know if it’s just the people I have dated or met, but a lot of people assume being asexual means they don’t date at all, like sure that is true for some folks but you can’t assume that. And I’ve dated an asexual before but they definitely weren’t actually asexual (no offence). But it’s so difficult to date as an asexual, because people I’ve dated clearly want sexual things while I rarely ever want that. Like why can’t I just have a normal relationship with love in it, I crave that so fucking much!

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Scaredy Cat
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It be so funny if we banned ppl with this mindset from breeding.
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im so confused any advice?

for years ive been toying w the idea i might be asexual but i just dont know, i have been assaulted multiple times throughout my childhood and im sure that has a huge effect on how i view intimacy but i just genuinely do not care abt it, i could life 100 lives and not care abt having sex, if my gf asked me to be intimate w her i probably would but it genuinely slips my mind so much that i forget that its something other people enjoy, ontop of this i have always absolutely hated being naked or anyone seeing me “below the belt”, i could chalk this up to lack of experience or childhood trauma but none of it really feels true, im also scared to talk to anyone ik abt it because me and my gf share the same friend group and i honestly dont know if she would stay with me if she thought i was 100% against sex, i dont mind it i just dont enjoy it, is this normal😓

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I wish I could turn into this
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Name something non sexual that you find very pleasurable?
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Currently reading
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I swear being ageoseuxal is hard to explain to others. And confusing

definition for what ageosexuality is for people who might not know it: individuals who may experience sexual arousal, enjoy sexual content, masturbation, or sexual fantasies, but do not desire sexual activity with another person or wish to form sexual relationships with others.


I’m happy to be aegosexual because for the longest time i thought I was a fake asexual, i thought I wasn’t asexual because I enjoy nsfw content. But I never wanted to actually do it in real life and the moment I found this label my gosh my life has been so much easier.


But trying to actually explain my sexuality is difficult, it’s so easy to but people tend to question me because I’m such a sexual person, I like to make sex jokes, I like to talk about my favorite characters engaging in that activity,

It’s possible I may be hypersexual because I was exposed to such content multiple times when I was young, but I always hated the idea of me ever being involved in the said activity. Often I get people saying. “Wait, aren’t you asexual?” And I had to explain again my sexuality.


Part of me sometimes believe that people don’t believe I’m asexual due to this.

But my sexuality is weird, like I’m 100% repulsed by the idea of ever doing it, I hate even thinking about it but I do like sex when it doesn’t involve me at all. I like watching other people, I like being aroused I don’t want to ever do it though.

But is that reasoning valid to call myself sex repulsed?

This post doesn’t make much sense I’m sure but I needed to get some of these feelings out.

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I have an ace flag hung up in my room and my little cousin painted a heart shaped magnet with the flag on it (by memory) because he loves me 🥹
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Does this count as asexuality?

Super confused here 🫠

So I came out as pansexual as a teen, because I'm romantically attracted to any and all genders. I'm also sexually attracted to any and all genders - BUT, I never ever want to have sex. I have in the past, and each time it's just solidified it more and more for me.

Does asexuality mean lack of attraction and desire? Or just attraction?

I'm a big reader, romances are my favourite, and I don't mind if they get spicy, I'm not repulsed or anything like that, sometimes I even enjoy it. But again, I don't want to have sex with literally anyone? It never crosses my mind when I meet new people either.

I do have a history of trauma so honestly don't know if that impacts things, but basically I'm wanting to know:

Is there a term for experiencing romantic attraction, sexual attraction rarely, but never wanting to act on it? Or is celibate the only real word for it?

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When life hits hard
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Hello

Hello everyone. I just wanted to introduce myself. I'm a 30 y.o. I'm Heteromantic Asexual. Nice to meet you all.

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When life hits hard
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JokeSeriously guys, we aren't at war. You can chill out.
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showering with your partner isnt sexual

i dont know if this is the corrct sub for this, but as an asexual every time i say that showering with your partner is more romantic then sexual i get weird looks and i need to know what you'll think, so let my explain:

showering puts you in a very vulnerable position, because it's your alone time you are standing there naked, and showers can also put you in a vulnerable mental state so letting some in to the shower with you is like saying that you are so comfortable with them that you are ok with them being there in your most vulnerable state (also washing my hair is a sacred actvity for me. so letting someone wash my hair or washing someones hair is a big deal for me)

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I fixed the ace flag /j
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Anyone Else Feel Like A Fake ACE Because You Are Sex Positive-ish

I'm fairly confident I'm asexual, as I've never felt sexual attraction. I don't care for porn, but I can appreciate lude and nude pictures from an artistic stand point. I also like to pose for them. What I think sets me apart from other ace people is that I like to fool around with people online. I don't want to get graphic or anything but I have very strong preferences. Part of me would like to try stuff IRL, but I also don't know. I have a hard time seeing my self in a sexual position, but it also feels kinda liberating. LIke haha purity culture I got laid. And Thematically it seems like the perfect touch to a romantic relationship.

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WIN: My new therapist says that there's nothing "wrong" with me and that my celibacy is actually HEALTHY!

I haven't quite accepted the asexuality label for myself yet, but I have reason to believe that I'm on some level of the asexuality spectrum. I've been voluntarily celibate for seven years. I'm always told by society that something is "wrong" with me to the point that I've believed it! After all, I'm a straight woman who is repulsed, and I mean REPULSED to the point where it borders on a phobia, by male genitalia. People always ask me all sorts of inappropriate questions, like if I'm gay (and not believing me when I say I'm not), and asking me if I have sexual trauma. Who asks a stranger that!!!!! I always thought this was something I would "get over," but over time it has not gotten "better." It's just how I am.


I'm seeing a new therapist and this came up way quicker with her than it has with any other therapist because I'm done feeling shame about it. She said that it's actually really healthy to know what I do and do not like and to make boundaries with my body!! I thought she was going to say there was something wrong with me just like society says. It was incredibly relieving.

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No one seems to get it

Every single time I've admitted to being ace to my parents I'm either told I'm too young, have to try it first, or I'm just insecure.

Today the topic of sex came up in conversation between me, my sister, father, and stepmom and when I said that I hope I never have sex my stepmother piped up saying that not having sex is cruel and unusual punishment that she wouldn't wish on anyone.

She also claims that she wouldn't be happy and fulfilled without it, that she knows she can't live without it. I just wish that she would actually listen to me for once instead of projecting her addiction onto me.

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I don't think I've ever been on a date that's been objectively better than pizza

if people tell me we're going out to eat pizza, or better yet, someone else is driving to pick up pizza and i can just watch tv while we wait, i think that, for me, is peak. I like to hang out with people and bond or watch movies or something like that. go see a show. idk. probably just talk about life a lot. maybe just chill.

but at the end of the day, no matter how much cool stuff we've done together or what museum we went to, i probably would've preferred to stay in, watch tv, and have pizza while my friend plays an interesting video game on the tv.

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"So like, never?"

Yes never. I said celibate. No, you're not special. No, I don't want to fuck you. Does no one know what celibate means anymore?

I'm tired.

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